Community Chat

[Buck-i-Nana]

On 1/14/2014 Suzie said:

I went to get a restraining order- basically had a judge laugh in my face- I told him when they found me dead he'd be laughing out the other side of his face- threatened me with contempt.. this was back in the late 70's... idiot judge..

My first husband was abusive. He was quite charming when people were around and had a particularly soothing almost entrancing voice. During my divorce, even my own attorney didn't really believe me and just thought I was claiming it for advantage. A year after the divorce, I had to take the ex back to court because he was in violation of the divorce agreement, a scheme concocted by he and his attorney regarding health insurance. Thankfully, MY attorney was smarter and had entered the specific coverages, not just saying maintain current coverage.

When the court found him in contempt, he finally showed his true self to everyone in the chambers. He stood up, threw the table from in front of him and came after me. He was physically restrained by his own lawyer and the bailiff as my lawyer hustled me out of the room and he immediately went to file a restraining order. Of course, those orders don't mean a whole lot, and my lawyer advised me to stay with friends until the ex had time to calm down.

[biancardi]

yes and I do mean in RL. I've had cyber stalking done as well but I have been stalked twice in RL.

[sylviahomeatlast]

I was stalked by a crazy woman on my cel phone, in person, and on my house phone ---spooky

[Bjjo]

I am fortunate that I have not had a stalking experience. I can only try to imagine what some here must have felt. It definitely would be a frightening, helpless situation!

[Puzzle Piece]

On 1/14/2014 Burnsite said:

On 1/14/2014 Love Roses said:

Why can't their parents ever teach a boy to take "NO" off a female and realize she means it.

Love Roses, I almost posted a similar statement myself.

That was the crux in the stalkings I experienced, The stalker doesn't take no as an answer and there are few safeguards for women until an assault has occurred.

Sad but true. As far as getting a restraining order, the guy isn't afraid of paperwork and he knows the slow response time the police have.

[jeanlake]

Late 70s - My first professional job after college. I worked at a college and met an economics professor five years older than me; the dean's nephew. He was handsome, funny and students loved him, etc. After spending time with him I noticed he was a control freak with ice in his veins. Not at all like my first impressions. I backed off. He was relentless. My apartment lease was up and I temporarily moved in with my widowed dad because I was afraid of the professor. Restraining order issued and I it was so awkward because I worked at the same college. People loved him. While on a walk in front of my dad's home, he tried to run over me with his car. He threatened to fight my dad if I didn't talk to him. I left a job I enjoyed at the college and traded it for a job I didn't enjoy. Mr. professor's brother was a tow truck driver. I walked out of work to the parking lot and couldn't find my car. Young PhD professor arranged for my car to be towed. No proof, I just knew it. Got an attorney and a month later, my car showed up in my driveway. I seriously wondered if the car was rigged. Lucky me, professor married one of his students. That barely lasted a year. I married that cute, wonderfully sane and stable, albeit a little bit boring, guy I met in college. BTW that boring, kinda shy guy matured to be a confident, successful, interesting man. Dr. Stalker recently retired from a local university and has been married 5 times.

[JustJules]

On 1/14/2014 brewhaha said:

Once. Unfortunately it was my parole officer.

I usually find your comments funny, this isn't one of those times. Unless you are being genuine and really had an issue with your parole officer, but I am guessing not.

Took me some time to read through everyone's posts, sharing their experiences, glad you started it Pqfan. Knowledge is power, and while some of these stories are really frightening, I believe it is helpful for women to read. If they are experiencing similar things, they know they aren't alone. It also is a good reminder that we should all be aware of our surroundings and people.

[SydneyH]

On 1/14/2014 Love Roses said:

On 1/14/2014 SydneyH said:

I have, they even kidnapped my pet and held it for 'ransom'. There's no limit to what some twisted people do. The police were useless btw.......

Yes, the police were useless with me also. There has to be a dead body. I watched my pets as well. I feared for my husband as those guys will do what they can to eliminate anyone they feel is in their way - even children. Why can't their parents ever teach a boy to take "NO" off a female and realize she means it.

Loves, I was soo distraught, keep in my my stalker was a med student who also later ......wait for it, went on to become a shrink. I finally had to go to my family (the same ones he also threatened) for help, they hired a pro, not sure in what area nor do I care, and the animal was returned to me shortly and he NEVER bothered me again. Later during a background check somebody asked me about him but he was imprisioned so I felt good letting them know everything.

[rondell]

On 1/15/2014 SydneyH said:

On 1/14/2014 Love Roses said:

On 1/14/2014 SydneyH said:

I have, they even kidnapped my pet and held it for 'ransom'. There's no limit to what some twisted people do. The police were useless btw.......

Yes, the police were useless with me also. There has to be a dead body. I watched my pets as well. I feared for my husband as those guys will do what they can to eliminate anyone they feel is in their way - even children. Why can't their parents ever teach a boy to take "NO" off a female and realize she means it.

Loves, I was soo distraught, keep in my my stalker was a med student who also later ......wait for it, went on to become a shrink. I finally had to go to my family (the same ones he also threatened) for help, they hired a pro, not sure in what area nor do I care, and the animal was returned to me shortly and he NEVER bothered me again. Later during a background check somebody asked me about him but he was imprisioned so I felt good letting them know everything.

LR and Sydney, I'm so sorry this happened to you. That must've been very hard to live through. Thank God you're both here and okay.

[SydneyH]

On 1/15/2014 rondell said:

On 1/15/2014 SydneyH said:

On 1/14/2014 Love Roses said:

On 1/14/2014 SydneyH said:

I have, they even kidnapped my pet and held it for 'ransom'. There's no limit to what some twisted people do. The police were useless btw.......

Yes, the police were useless with me also. There has to be a dead body. I watched my pets as well. I feared for my husband as those guys will do what they can to eliminate anyone they feel is in their way - even children. Why can't their parents ever teach a boy to take "NO" off a female and realize she means it.

Loves, I was soo distraught, keep in my my stalker was a med student who also later ......wait for it, went on to become a shrink. I finally had to go to my family (the same ones he also threatened) for help, they hired a pro, not sure in what area nor do I care, and the animal was returned to me shortly and he NEVER bothered me again. Later during a background check somebody asked me about him but he was imprisioned so I felt good letting them know everything.

LR and Sydney, I'm so sorry this happened to you. That must've been very hard to live through. Thank God you're both here and okay.

It's all good Rondell, but it was a very dark period in my life, one I would not wish on anyone.