Community Chat

[feline groovy]

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@HappyDaze wrote:

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... @feline groovy based on what you wrote here and all the bullet points you posted about this person, how would this be a hand up instead of just a hand out? And I do NOT mean this in a rude or snarky way at all so please don't take it that way. But what I am trying to understand is how would this money help them improve their situation so that they could eventually be self-sustaining in the future? With all the issues and challenges they have , I can't see how they would/could change anything so this desperate situation doesn't occur again and they would have to turn to asking for money again in the future. I am all for helping people out to improve their situation and help them to become self-sufficient so please help me understand how this would happen with this particular person?

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@HappyDaze

Be assured that I do  understand what you mean, and that I'm the least easily-offended person LOL, which there's seems to be more and more of these days.

I've yet to see you be rude or snarky anyway, and don't think it's your natural milieu.  ;-)

But to address your comments and questions, perhaps it's just because they're a pretty decent person who might be worthy of this only-temporary assistance, so that they can continue to work towards a better life.

This temporary help just might literally save their life if it's an emergency situation, therefore giving them more time to try to achieve their dreams and keep paying things forward.

Not sure if any of that makes any sense, LOL.

I guess I think that most living beings (but especially animals & kids) are worth saving, despite the fact that I'm a born idealist and highly sensitive person who had to also become a realist. 

Even those souls who might have a lot of redeeming to do.

You're a sweetie, BTW.  

[sunshine45]

@feline groovy

one more thought if your friend does not have a facebook page. a friend can set up the fund for him or her and briefly tell the story. that friend can then share the gofundme page on their facebook page and hope that friends will contribute and/or pass it along on their own pages. i know that a couple of friends have shared these types of stories and i have given something because they are known by my friends. it isnt easy, but it could be a start.

i just remembered another friend of mine who passed away a few years ago. her family members set up a fund for her......she had a very rare fatal genetic disease that was diagnosed rather late in her life.....two children, a husband, and she was only 50 years old. even with the health insurance they went through a lot of tough times and really needed extra funds to give her a decent quality of life up to the day she died.

[tedEbear]

   Was the story about the little girl who lost her whole family in a fire and was severely burnt herself, on the threads here?  

     All she wanted for Christmas was Christmas cards.  Hallmark set up a way for that.  There was also a go fund me account set up.  She recieved wishes beyond her wishes and ended up with with thieves stealing money from her left and right from people "helping with all the mail and finances wonderful people sent her.

     In Arizona a vicious dog recieved a whole more in his gofundme account to help with his legal bills and the person mauled by the dog recieved almost nothing.  So gofund is definitely based on the giver and their views and morals.]-------tedEbear

[KarenQVC]

OP--If this is a case of life and death, it should be put into the hands of social services immediately.  Phone the emergency Adult Protective Services 24 hour line in your state.  This is a case for professionals. 

[feline groovy]

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@sunshine45 wrote:

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@feline groovy wrote:

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@sunshine45 wrote:

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@Sunshine Kate wrote:

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@feline groovy wrote:

Q community board peeps ~

I know that this is an unusual question, but here goes:

Has anyone here been forced to set up a GoFundMe account for their own  use as a total last resort, due to the lack of help elsewhere?

And if so, could you please detail your experience(s) here?

FYI BTW:  if the recipient doesn't have a bank account,  a check will be sent instead if there's any funding.

Thanks mucho for any info, tips, &/or other stuff that you've got.  

~ Feline   8-) 

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@feline groovy

Just wondering, if the recipient doesn't have a bank account and a check is mailed to them, how do they cash the check if there's no bank account?

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you can open a bank account with the check OR cash the check at the bank it is drawn on with two forms of ID, one of them should be a photo ID. they can also go to the bank with someone else and have them deposit it into their account and then that person can give them the money.

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@sunshine45

Very often banks have an issue with depositing what they call "third party checks".

The other stuff I've heard is usually OK, but I would also explore other aptions if possible.

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@feline groovy

in this instance, how would it be a third party check? if someone has a go fund me account in their own name, then i assume that the check would come to them. for example, jane smith has a go fund me account set up. the check is issued in her name. she goes to the bank and says i want to open an account. she should not have a problem as long as she has a photo id and another form of id AND the check made out to her.

the other scenario i posted was more of a "third party check." jane smith gets the funds via a check mailed to her. she doesnt want to open an account. she asks YOU to please deposit it for her. she goes to the bank with you and signs the check and shows her id. you then sign the check and deposit it into your account. then you withdraw the cash to give to her.

if the check is made out to her and drawn on a bank that is in her area.....say ABC bank. she can go to ABC bank with her two ids and cash the check there. they MAY ask her to pay a $10 check cashing fee though since she doesnt have an account there.

if those three scenarios are not what you were thinking then let me know. i hope the person in need is able to work this out and get back on his or her feet.....along with getting the chance to get some help from social services and EVERYTHING that may be available to him or her.

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Sorry, Sun45.

I should have clarified that it's not necessarily re: a crowdfunding check.

But I've heard this when the check is not drawn on an account with the bank the recipient would be opening an account with, or trying to cash just by itself, or trying to cash via a deposit into the account of a friend or family member with them.

Wow, that couldn't be any more muddled, huh?

I try to be more succinct in general, and it usually works with written communication.

At least it used to, LOL.

I love people (like you) who take the time for clarification; that's always my goal as well.

Especially since many people nowadays do things too quickly & casually, therefore not always i.e. comprehending  what they might read or actually hearing  what they might listen to.

Hey, I'm trying to be much more mindful - at all times - myself;

Your compassion and good vibes are appreciated by everyone who's in need. 8)

[HappyDaze]

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@feline groovy wrote:

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@HappyDaze wrote:

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... @feline groovy based on what you wrote here and all the bullet points you posted about this person, how would this be a hand up instead of just a hand out? And I do NOT mean this in a rude or snarky way at all so please don't take it that way. But what I am trying to understand is how would this money help them improve their situation so that they could eventually be self-sustaining in the future? With all the issues and challenges they have , I can't see how they would/could change anything so this desperate situation doesn't occur again and they would have to turn to asking for money again in the future. I am all for helping people out to improve their situation and help them to become self-sufficient so please help me understand how this would happen with this particular person?

---

@HappyDaze

Be assured that I do  understand what you mean, and that I'm the least easily-offended person LOL, which there's seems to be more and more of these days.

I've yet to see you be rude or snarky anyway, and don't think it's your natural milieu.  ;-)

But to address your comments and questions, perhaps it's just because they're a pretty decent person who might be worthy of this only-temporary assistance, so that they can continue to work towards a better life.

This temporary help just might literally save their life if it's an emergency situation, therefore giving them more time to try to achieve their dreams ad keep paying things forward.

Not sure if any of that makes any sense, LOL.

I guess I think that most living beings (but especially animals & kids) are worth saving, despite the fact that I'm a born idealist and highly sensitive person who had to also become a realist. 

Even those souls who might have a lot of redeeming to do.

You're a sweetie, BTW.  

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@feline groovyfirst off, thank you for taking my post the way it was intended and secondly, thank you for all the kind words and know that I feel the same way about you!

I understand what you mean and I do believe that most living beings are worth saving. However, I have been involved several situations with friends and family, including interventions, in which you help and help and help only to come to the realization that until that person you are helping actually works their butt off to change their situation, all the help in the world won't change their situation and the cycle continues. It doesn't mean the person is bad or not worth the effort to help, but no one can save someone from themself, if that makes sense. 

Again, I am all for helping someone in dire straits but I'd like to also see what efforts they will be putting in in order to prevent the same situation from occurring 6 months after they receive the money (or other types of help). And there are so many programs and such for people in dire situations, both government based and non-profit organizations, that should be able to help not just financially but to help them get on the right track so that this kind of situation can be prevented in the future, whether that means skill/job training, meals on wheels type programs to bring food to the person, counseling, teaching them basic organizational skills and money mangement, management of health issues, etc. Unless, of course,  this is a super remote area then these types of programs would be limited.

Good luck to you and this person. I know your heart is in the right place and hope that the person you are trying to help will be able to get their life back on track and find happiness and success (however they may define it) in their life.

[feline groovy]

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@tedEbear wrote:

...So gofund is definitely based on the giver and their views and morals.]-------tedEbear

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But hopefully always knowing that children and animals are not born "bad"; they're made.

[tessakaye]

Recently in the Chicago area, Fund Me sites have been set up for the funerals of a teenage boy killed in a car accident, and for a family of 6 killed in their home (an unresolved case).   The Fund Me for the family was to take their remains back to Mexico for burial.   The funeral sites are the ones I see most frequently.

[JeanLouiseFinch]

So, if it's true that a GoFundMe has to be linked to a person's Facebook account, if said person is so destitute, how can they afford a cellphone and/or computer to use Facebook or the GFM site, in the first place?

[CouponQueen]

Often I see family/friends setting up the GFM on Facebook..so not all of them have access to computers.

I have never given to any of them as the ones I see are often the 'hmmm' but I know you go out drinking every weekend but your son wants us to pay for your move and bills as you are both disabled and are evicted? Or the one their child is in the hospital with a illness that is not life threatening but actually psychological and you are refusing to see that..that said..you want us to give you money for expenses when I know your job has a fund for those on FMLA that gave you ten grand for this??  (distant family so you know the details..)

That said in regards to the OP question. I would think if somebody is that hard up..they could revisit the social agencies again..as it is hard to believe with all the assistance out there nobody can assist this person. Office of the Aging, United Way, Community Action agencies..Adult Protective Services ..even a local Dept of Social Services..should know which agencies can assist..there has to be some type of funding for this person's needs. There has to be somebody who knows in their area..