Do You get along with - Page 4

Trinity11 · ‎11-16-2014

@Luvtuna wrote:
Trinity11 you are very sensible. I tried to "heart" you but it just takes me to my sign in page. Anyone else have that happen?

Thank you @Luvtuna . My hearts do not always work either. I often have to try 3 or 4 times to get them to work..

goldensrbest · ‎03-10-2010

When you are alone ,husband has died,and only have one child , mine other son died in 1998, you have to depend on them , they have time to do other things they enjoy, so i feel they should help you ,we are important also, my brother who is turning 60 ,takes my mom to all her doctor appointments, comes over nearly every day,go to grocery store with her ,helps out doors ,mows yard, he works ,and is married ,his wife understands,she has a sister that needs alot of help, that is FAMILY.

When you lose some one you L~O~V~E, that Memory of them, becomes a TREASURE.

AuntG · ‎03-09-2010

I'd limit my requests to the things I really need help with. Sometimes we can appear too needy by contacting our kids for every little thing. Also, their are things I'd sooner pay for (let's say an oil change for example) even though the mechanic in the family would probably do it for me.

CelticCrafter · ‎03-09-2010

Just because he's retired doesn't mean he should be at your beck and call 24/7.

RetRN · ‎10-01-2013

If the relationship with your son hasn't been strained in the past I think the situation will resolve itself. Just remember to be kind and not pushy.

NickNack · ‎03-10-2010

@halfpint1 I'm so sorry you argued with your son. I just wanted to let you know that I used to have trouble getting the heartworm medicine on my cat, too. Now I take him in the bathroom and close the door so he can't get away. I put him in the sink after I have the medicine ready to squirt on him. Then I hold him as best as I can while squirting the medicine between his shoulders. It needs to be between the shoulders so they can't lick it off. Doing it this way has helped tremendously. I hope this is helpful.

The Bluebird Carries The Sky On His Back"
-Henry David Thoreau

1Snickers · ‎03-19-2016

I have a son who owns his own business. I drop the newspaper off there and stay a few minutes so he will know I’m okay. He likes that.

I seldom ask him to help me, I drive and have yard maintenance, etc.

I’ve asked him to move his antique car over that’s in my extra garage. (It’s been sitting there 3 years and doesn’t start). It’s hard to get Christmas items out so I bought new.

Once I called got junk and had a team take away a lot of garage items. I’m going to do that with my attic this fall because he did a bit twice and quit. Never has more than an hour. He doesn’t know where to start or what to toss even with me telling him.

I’ve learned that work, football, kids, and his dog are more important to him,( as it should be).

So, I am using his inheritance to pay for things that must be done and it doesn’t seem to bother him. It’s easier for me also!

That being said; he walked my dogs when I’ve been sick (in addition to a dog walker) and I know he will help if really needed. I will not be a burden to him.

@halfpint1 Your son like mine loves you and can’t help you when you want. We have to be patient and give them their own time and live our own life. Take care!

GenXmuse · ‎05-15-2016

Although family should help out I think it is possible to take advantage of this and it be seen as a burden.

You are lucky he lives so close and does what he can to keep you independent as much as possible. Do your best to help yourself and be more open to suggestions that would make his life easier as well.

Anonymous032819 · ‎03-29-2019

This is exactly why you need to move to senior apartments, where you will have more than just your son to turn to for help.

At the very least, you can schedule a senior care giver to come in one or two days a week for a few hours each time, and they can keep you company, and do small tasks for you.

Your son may be seeing you as a burden.

Just because he is retired, does not mean that he is at your beck and call 24-hours a day, 7 days a week.

Also, speaking as an ony child who took care of my father as his dementia worsened, he became more and more argumentitive, and difficult.

I was taking care of him in addition to working a full-time job.

You may be at a point in your life where you need more help than he knows how to give, or is even physically able to give.

I am sure that he is trying to do the best that he can, but the type of care that you need may be more than he is able to give.

The Sky looks different when you have someone you love up there.

proudlyfromNJ · ‎05-01-2010

She just asked him for help giving the cat medicine. I don’t see that as some horrible imposition. Sounds like he said he would help but didn’t say when and she just wanted know.

She doesn’t drive, is all by herself and is in her eighties. And I don’t think many assisted living units allow cats. Edited to add this is not true. They do allow cats.

I don’t see where op talked about inheritance unless I missed it.

I think she’s letting off steam. Sometimes it’s hard having no friends. Or not having them near you.