Re: Do You Remember When

Deree · ‎06-30-2018

No I can't say I was a brat or ever took anything for granted. My mom was orphaned at a young age and grew up learning the value of things and how to be self-sufficient. My dad was an immigrant and worked hard to go from the mail room to president of his own company. My parents had to work very hard for everything they provided to us so I guess I learned my parents' values of being practical, saving, and knowing the value of things. I never got an allowance and never asked for one. If there was something I really wanted I would ask for it but this hardly ever happened. Happy with what I had which was less than the other kids. I also started working in my teens during summer vacation because I wanted to. First job was at age 13. I remember having to get working papers.

Wear a mask. Social distance. Be part of the solution - not part of the problem.

SilleeMee · ‎05-22-2016

I was raised 'in the Army'...a military brat. Things were never taken for granted and us kids were reminded of that often. My mom was an immigrant from Japan where she lost everything in the war. Us kids knew at a very young age what it meant to work hard for what you need and then work even harder for the things you want.

Porcelain · ‎02-19-2014

I got quite a bit of what I wanted as a child (but never a horse, which turned out to be a good thing) and teen and did not understand much about money. I just had plenty of it and exchanged it for things I wanted and then waited for holidays and special occasions to receive the rest.

As a young teen I did not even cash all my babysitting checks because I had no pressing reason to. I enjoyed working, but I didn't care about the money. It was very much a charmed bubble existence. I wasn't a brat per se, (looking back, I was surprisingly generous, mimicking my parents, and did not demand the things I wanted) more like completely unaware.

I had a lot of learning and catching up to do once I got completely out on my own and had to support myself. A lot.

Edited to add: There was a huge downside to all this. My parents were not happy. My dad had an amazing founding position in a company, that he hated. My mom was pushed into a superficial role she hated and had to put her true talents to one side. And they both tried to shield me from all of it, but I could still sense the disconnect and dis-ease. Money wasn't a problem, but other things were.

But no one cared if I left the lights on.

When you’re accustomed to privilege, equality feels like oppression.
"Power without love is reckless and abusive, and love without power is sentimental and anemic." - Dr. Martin Luther King Jr

Witchy Woman · ‎03-15-2010

@Jordan2

I understand what you are saying. While I was never allowed to be disrespectful or bratty, I didn't have a full appreciation for my parents' sacrifices or concerns.

We were expected to help around the house and clean, and I paid a little "rent" when I started to work. But, I didn't have a deep understanding that they were week to week sometimes and, we were likely "poor" .....as were most of the families/kids in my small town. I'm thankful I didn't realize that last part until I was older.

I feel I was able to "repay" them when my husband and I built them a lovely new home adjoining ours and they moved in rent free. Although, my mother was sad to leave her home, I was able to be here for them as they aged and needed care.

ECBG · ‎01-08-2011

@Jordan2 I know exactly what you're saying. You weren't mean, you really didn't have the ability to see "the BIG picture".

Mombo1 · ‎11-02-2015

@RetRN wrote:
I also have to plead guilty. I should have been more appreciative and grateful for their sacrifices.

@RetRN My parents were always very frugal...but truthfully we never really knew it. That is just the way it was. As kids we were happy to have a bike and friends to play with. Years past and at one point..my sister and brother and I were in college at the same time. My parents paid for our education in full and none of us had college debt. So all those years of living with frugal parents was more than a blessing. I am grateful for all their sacrifices too.

SeaMaiden · ‎03-10-2010

@BLH wrote:
I wouldn't apologize to my parents for anything. They had money and constantly complained about turning off the lights and wasting hot water. I couldn't wait until I got married and I could run all the hot water I want. They wouldn't used the air conditioning in the car because it wasted gas. I put my air conditioner on full blast. They were both miserable people.

You are calling a lot of people miserable then.... I would call someone with no regard for conserving or mindful of waste "selfish". But, different strokes for different folks and one extreme or the other is not good. There is a happy medium.

Sooner · ‎03-10-2010

I grew up in a very very poor part of the country. I don't think many of us took anything for granted.

Some kids I went to school with basically had nothing. Wore the same clothes all the time, often didn't have shoes. Lived in shacks you wouldn't keep a dog in now 'cause you'd go to jail if you did.

If you never lived that way or at least grew up around it, I don't see how you could ever relate to that. There's poor than there is REALLY poor, desperate. There is a huge difference.