Divorce/custody questions - Page 5

lovesrecess · ‎03-14-2010

Custody and divorce legal statutes vary state to state....stay away from any online information as it may not be accurate. Hire an attorney that specializes in divorce/ custody fast!

I know personally from a close relative that the "father's custody"-type groups can have agendas that don't just deal with the best interests of the child....If your son was kept in the dark about the other man and two kids, there could be other stuff he hasn't been told...get an attorney fast!

lovesrecess · ‎03-14-2010

Most states do not take the child's input until the age of 12...at the youngest, that's why an attorney in your state rather than anything online is so important.

Zhills · ‎11-15-2011

All states do not have a Legal Separation status. You are either married or you are divorced.

missy1 · ‎03-10-2010

@lovesrecess wrote:
Custody and divorce legal statutes vary state to state....stay away from any online information as it may not be accurate. Hire an attorney that specializes in divorce/ custody. If you are concerned about the cost, many attorneys will do an initial consultation at a minimal cost or free....or you could contact your local legal aid association.
I know personally from a close relative that the "father's custody"-type groups can have agendas that don't just deal with the best interests of the child....tell your son to hire a bonafide attorney asap.

Your court house should have a law library, and has what court papers to get (also online documents). There is someone to help you (not with the actual legal issues of your divorce, just common stuff). Like I said if you can afford an attorney, you should. The most simplest divorce case here costs around 3,000 and can go into 5 figures. One can also fill out the papers, and have a paralegal look over them. (they also can't give legal advise) They check to see if it was filled out correctly, so the court don't reject it. If it is just a custody issue, with no assets, debt, and property it is not hard to do it yourself. When doing it yourself , you have to fill out the papers as you are an attorney, (meaning they have to be competent). One can also get a mediator between the two parties. Plus the Op's granddaughter is almost a teen.

chrystaltree · ‎05-10-2010

Divorced or not; you son should have hired a lawyer and worked out a custody arrangement 8 years ago because even if everything was hunky dory and amicable then....this type of thing was bound to happen. You son needs a REAL laywer, there is no website or online legal site that can help him. It's ridiculous of him to even that. That father's advocacy group might have a listing of local attorneys on their site. As for the mother's relationship and her children, this is 2018 and that won't be factor at all in custody unless the man she is with is danger or an abuser or something.

Group 5 minus 1 · ‎03-11-2010

I am sure your son does not want to spend the money--HE MUST!!!

chrystaltree · ‎05-10-2010

@Lindsays Grandma wrote:
@Zhills wrote:
One of my co-workers lost his children because, "even though the wife and man were not married, it was a more normal atmosphere for children.!"

Yep, that's what the Judge ruled.....unbelieveable but true!
I am stunned...your co-worker should have taken it to another court, what was decreed by that judge, in my opinion, was wrong.

I'd have to see that for myself. It's been many years since any court in this country ruled in that manner. It just happened anymore. Custody is based on what is in the best interest of the child ... period. Of course, co-habitating with someone and having children with that person is not in any wy detrimetal or a bad influence. Half the people in this country are living with someone and not married now.

Silver Lining · ‎04-16-2010

@chihuahuamom

You've received some good advice and, more importantly, excellent information from posters like @missy1 in particular. It was factual and pretty much applicable to anyone in regard to separation and divorce.

There seem to be some major gaps in the story about your son's situation which might be understandable to some degree. However, a lot of it makes no sense to me and I'm a social worker with years and years of experience in family and children cases.

Anyway, I'm wondering what you think about the responses to your questions about the issues you described and/or getting involved with an online custody advocacy group for fathers.