Dad made us promise we wouldn't put Mom in a home

Lila Belle · ‎01-24-2013

Your thoughts.

bri20 · ‎03-10-2016

I think it's none of our business.

MyGirlsMom · ‎03-09-2010

This is a very personal decision to make and only concerns those who would be her Caregivers. I wish you well in whatever you and your family decide.

Keep Your Face To The Sunshine and You Will Not See The Shadow

Mmsfoxxie · ‎06-19-2010

Since you asked @Lila Belle, my thought is that that's something your dad shouldn't ask of you. There are circumstances that happen that might make you break that promise, if made. Then you'll feel twice as bad if you can't take care of her. I don't know your circumstances so the decision is definitely yours.

“You can’t wait until life isn’t hard anymore to be happy”. (By Nightbirde, singer of the song, It’s Ok)

misscecille · ‎08-22-2010

Have you spoken to your mother? What are her wishes? I had to make the decision to put my mom into assisted living. She wasn't happy but I did it because I love her and want her to be safe.. My head said said yes, but my heart said no. She's happy but does miss her house. She's made lots of new friends and is finally eating properly. Good luck to you.

Moonchilde · ‎05-23-2010

My thoughts would be different, depending on whether this is just another hypothetical thread-starter, or whether it's an actual situation involving the OP and/or her family.

I've grown leery/weary of threads where people are piling on an OP who later comes back and states "I never said it was me, I just asked a question. You all assumed it was me. I just wanted to know what people think."

Life without Mexican food is no life at all

Lila Belle · ‎01-24-2013

My parents and grandparents have never demanded this of us.

I've seen a commercial that uses this as a heart-tugging ploy or motivation to use their aides to keep mom in her home.

QVCkitty1 · ‎05-23-2015

No one can tell you what to do, but you will know. No matter how many promises you make, sometimes the decision is taken out of your hands. My mom died after a long and brave battle with cancer. I was left with my dad who's Alzheimer's was getting worse. No matter what anyone tells you , it is almost impossible to get someone to provide any in home care. His heart condition got worse, and it broke my heart, but I could no longer care for him on my own. Before I could make arrangements for nursing home care, his heart gave out. I was spared . The fact remains we all do our best, and sometimes we can't keep our promise no matter how well meaning we are. Give yourself a break, and remember some things you just can't promise.🌺

" You are entitled to your opinion. But you are not entitled to your own facts."
Daniel Patrick Moynihan

hopi · ‎03-09-2010

@Moonchilde

@Moonchilde wrote:
My thoughts would be different, depending on whether this is just another hypothetical thread-starter, or whether it's an actual situation involving the OP and/or her family.

I've grown leery/weary of threads where people are piling on an OP who later comes back and states "I never said it was me, I just asked a question. You all assumed it was me. I just wanted to know what people think."

My goodness you hit the nail on the head

Your good

Dusty1 · ‎03-10-2010

You will do what you have to do. For you. For your life. For your Mom. I'm sorry if this is a decision that you are facing & if a promise that you made to your Dad is weighing on your heart.