Re: Controlling men?

Another new name Sue · ‎03-11-2010

I sympathize, Mima. You probably have very little if any power over this situation except sharing with parents. It makes it painful for you to be so limited.

Let's hope her parents are involved enough to see what is going on. If she's a needy girl without parental involvement....not so good.

ROMARY · ‎04-28-2010

I thought of this many years ago: Some people are so in control, they become out of control. Ironic.

'More or less', 'Right or wrong', 'In general', and 'Just thinking out loud ' (as usual).

Tinkrbl44 · ‎08-23-2010

@mima wrote:
If you have ever been in a relationship with a controlling man, what do you think made them controlling?

This does not have anything to do with my relationship, however my grandson is showing signs of being this way with his young girlfriend. I hate this. I wonder what makes them this way.

If no one else does. I hope you will step in and have a little talk with him to see if you can determine what makes him tick. If he isn't forthcoming, perhaps the least you can do is emphasize how very unattractive that behavior is and it will probably make girls run in the other direction when they see him.

MyGirlsMom · ‎03-09-2010

@mima wrote:
If you have ever been in a relationship with a controlling man, what do you think made them controlling?

This does not have anything to do with my relationship, however my grandson is showing signs of being this way with his young girlfriend. I hate this. I wonder what makes them this way.

***

Insecurity

Keep Your Face To The Sunshine and You Will Not See The Shadow

foundinlv · ‎04-20-2012

New version of "You Don't Own Me"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pi1zM-HVVEs

Original version:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CmOrWG2FTbg

ROMARY · ‎04-28-2010

I'm (just) thinking that just maybe it's their personalities......From a very young age. Very meticulous, 'in control' of this and that. Everything is fine until they live with someone else who isn't 'in line'. (their line)

'More or less', 'Right or wrong', 'In general', and 'Just thinking out loud ' (as usual).

hckynutjohn · ‎06-15-2015

My feelings on either gender controlling someone. A person cannot control you unless you allow them to do so.

My drunken father tried to control my mother by threats and beatings. He failed because she would not allow it. She had to raise 4 of us alone because she kicked him out of all of our lives and we were/are all better because of her strength to do so.

hckynut(john)

SaRina · ‎04-17-2015

@mima wrote:
She's 15 and he's 17. I don't know about anything physical (abuse wise) going on, but she has to text him between every class (his rule). She wanted to spend the weekend with a girlfriend and he told her she shouldn't want to spend one weekend with her girlfriend because they only have twenty some weekends left til school is out and they should be spent with him. He stated exactly how many weekends they had left. She is complaining about him being controlling.

It doesn't sound like much (yet) but I'm sure it will get worse if she puts up with it.

I am concerned, but I doubt he'll listen to grandma. You know, we don't know much (in their eyes) when it comes to relationships/romance. LOL

I have to disagree with you here, MIMA. IMO this behavior is a huge red flag with the potential to become physically abusive. (Sorry to be so blunt.) These are two children -- the boy is too young to even understand what he is doing and the consequences of his actions, and the girl is too young to understand that his behavior/demands are completely inappropriate and unacceptable. An intervention is sorely needed either by his parents, plus yourself and/or a professional. I'm sure there are resources in your area that can assist in the proper approach. I hope it all works out.

Penellope · ‎09-03-2012

You cannot expect such a young girl to recognize this behavior as toxic. He is probably telling her he loves her, and she is flattered by all the attention.

italia8140 · ‎10-24-2015

@Nightowlz wrote:
I don't know what makes some men like that. Probably the same thing that makes women take it. I don't need a man controlling my life. I would never put up with that. If DH was like that he would find his stuff in the front yard. LOL!!!

ITA! I would NEVER be in a relationship with a controlling man. The women who are have low self- esteem and allow themselves to be controlled.