Community Chat

[september]

I had never heard the term "catfish" until it was publicized that one of the Sister Wives got duped. 

So...no..no one in my real life has been a victim.

[SharkE]

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@missy1 wrote:

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@tansy wrote:

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@SharkE wrote:

Like Phil says "would you rather be happy, alone or miserable with a man"?

Decision, is yours.  My sister in law remarried not quite a yr. after her husband died and all she could do is sit around and whine "I don't want to be alone" boo hoo, boo hoo.

Well, she remarried and he's tighter then a tick she's still having to work at almost 75 and he makes her pay most of the household accounts and pay for the groceries all out of her babysitting money and her own SS because you see he wouldn't let her draw off of his which would had given triple benefit monthly. So now, she's getting a lousy 450 a month SS and babysitting and paying the bills.

Yep, I'd rather been alone and living in a Gov. apt that's subsidized or in my child's basement. Her daughter would had let her stay with them for free all she would had had to do is tidy up the house and help her working daughter, but, no she wanted a man and she got a lou lou.

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Your SIL doesn't need his permission to get the higher benefit.  She should contact SS to see if she qualifies for the higher benefit.

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I have a long time for S.S. How does one get a higher amount of SS, if the other spouse is not deceased or divorced (drawing from ex husband)?  

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You have to wait till he's dead and prove you were married 10 yrs. or more. Far as I know.

[SharkE]

Laws may be changed 40 times by the time you will be drawing. I look for them to change it to where a woman has to work to be able to draw any SS. She won't be able to draw off her husband, period.

[shoptilyadropagain]

Thank you for the "Catfish" explanation, @Gioiella.  I've never seen the original documentary but I've watched the MTV show from the very beginning. I had always wondered where and how that term originated but had never investigated it before.

[tansy]

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@missy1 wrote:

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@tansy wrote:

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@SharkE wrote:

Like Phil says "would you rather be happy, alone or miserable with a man"?

Decision, is yours.  My sister in law remarried not quite a yr. after her husband died and all she could do is sit around and whine "I don't want to be alone" boo hoo, boo hoo.

Well, she remarried and he's tighter then a tick she's still having to work at almost 75 and he makes her pay most of the household accounts and pay for the groceries all out of her babysitting money and her own SS because you see he wouldn't let her draw off of his which would had given triple benefit monthly. So now, she's getting a lousy 450 a month SS and babysitting and paying the bills.

Yep, I'd rather been alone and living in a Gov. apt that's subsidized or in my child's basement. Her daughter would had let her stay with them for free all she would had had to do is tidy up the house and help her working daughter, but, no she wanted a man and she got a lou lou.

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Your SIL doesn't need his permission to get the higher benefit.  She should contact SS to see if she qualifies for the higher benefit.

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I have a long time for S.S. How does one get a higher amount of SS, if the other spouse is not deceased or divorced (drawing from ex husband)?  

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@missy1, if you were married to your ex for 10 years, you can collect SS based on his earnings.  It doesn't matter how many wives he had.  

[tansy]

@missy1 Your ex does NOT need to be dead.  

[JaneMarple]

This very same argument continues to come evry year. And thank you again Tansy for explaining it. 

[Ibby114]

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@shoptilyadropagain wrote:

Thank you for the "Catfish" explanation, @Gioiella.  I've never seen the original documentary but I've watched the MTV show from the very beginning. I had always wondered where and how that term originated but had never investigated it before.

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I watch the show all the time- Nev Shulman usually mentions the origin of the word in the intro. 

[Irshgrl31201]

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@SharkE wrote:

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@missy1 wrote:

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@tansy wrote:

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@SharkE wrote:

Like Phil says "would you rather be happy, alone or miserable with a man"?

Decision, is yours.  My sister in law remarried not quite a yr. after her husband died and all she could do is sit around and whine "I don't want to be alone" boo hoo, boo hoo.

Well, she remarried and he's tighter then a tick she's still having to work at almost 75 and he makes her pay most of the household accounts and pay for the groceries all out of her babysitting money and her own SS because you see he wouldn't let her draw off of his which would had given triple benefit monthly. So now, she's getting a lousy 450 a month SS and babysitting and paying the bills.

Yep, I'd rather been alone and living in a Gov. apt that's subsidized or in my child's basement. Her daughter would had let her stay with them for free all she would had had to do is tidy up the house and help her working daughter, but, no she wanted a man and she got a lou lou.

---

Your SIL doesn't need his permission to get the higher benefit.  She should contact SS to see if she qualifies for the higher benefit.

---

I have a long time for S.S. How does one get a higher amount of SS, if the other spouse is not deceased or divorced (drawing from ex husband)?  

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You have to wait till he's dead and prove you were married 10 yrs. or more. Far as I know.

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@SharkE I was confused about this too. Above you said he wouldn't let her draw off of his which would have given her triple the amount of money. How would she draw off of his if he is still alive? Did you mean to say draw off of her husband who died? That would drive me crazy, watching a person you care about allow themselves to be walked all over. What does she tell you when you tell her she doesn't need his permission to get the higher amount? That is so crazy she wouldn't listen to you. I can't imagine being that desperate for a man. I SO would rather be by myself than with a man like that. That must be so exasperating for you!

As for Catfish, I have watched that show many times and it is so hard to believe people are actually that dumb. I don't understand why someone would continue to email or even talk to someone for so long with out ever meeting. THen when they are supposed to meet, the person has another reason for cancelling it. How are people so naive to have never met the person or never even talked to them on the phone or skype and there is always an excuse as to why that hasn't happened. I watched one episode where the guy and girl had been talking for over 10 yrs and he would never skype her, always making an excuse and every meeting they had planned he would get into a car accident or have some crazy outlandish story. How do you NOT know at that point that the person is not who they say they are. It is just unbelieveable to me that people are that stupid. 

[missy1]

The op SIL husband is ALIVE and MARRIED to each other, so how would that work? . How can the SIL collect more SS from him? SIL  gets $450 a month SS. That means she did not work/make much in  those quarters. Is her husbabd saying she can collect more from her previous spouse to get more SS?

I know about the 10 years married rule.

Also, if your spouse is now deceased.

@tansy