Re: Cash Wedding Gift - How much? - Page 11

Hoovermom · ‎03-19-2010

On 5/22/2014 sunshine45 said:
On 5/22/2014 Hoovermom said:
On 5/22/2014 Lila Belle said:
Everyone who gripes about bridezillas seem, to me, to be feeding the beast by trying to cover the cost of their tab.

Do people ever purchase from the registry ?

I try to always purchase from the registry. If the bride has gone to the trouble to compile one, I know that they want what is on it. Also, if it for an out of town wedding, make sure to have it shipped directly to them. I have never encountered a registry that had honeymoon list, sounds interesting to me. Are they asking for cash????? BTW has anyone seen Jill Duggar's registry at Walmart? It is a very down to earth registry and I think that is pretty cool. Obviously she values how she has been brought up whether anyone agrees with it. They seem like a loving family.

for example, if they are on a cruise, you can buy them a dinner in town when docked, a tour that they may want to take, drinks on board, events, etc....

Sunshine, that sounds like a great idea!!! Thanks. I will keep that in mind for the next invitation.

abbeythe 8th · ‎04-17-2010

The concept of a bridal registry has changed since we were married in 1972. Back then you registered your china, silver and crystal patterns. It was for wedding presents, not shower gifts. Color schemes were included on shower invitations. As most married couples were setting up their first home, they needed everything and anything. It was not unusual to call the MOB and ask for suggestions.

I am not familiar with the concept that your cash gift must cover the cost of dinner. To the OP, I'd probably go along with the amount you suggested.

birddrops · ‎07-16-2010

On 5/22/2014 LipstickDiva said:
On 5/22/2014 circles said:
On 5/21/2014 birddrops said:
I would say $200.00. OMG $50.00 is really cheap these days!

totally agree....I would never give such a cheap gift...

And I would never be so rude as to tell someone their gift was cheap.

I don't recall telling someone their gift was cheap. To me these days, $50.00 is really cheap. Wink

LilacTree · ‎03-25-2012

On 5/22/2014 birddrops said:
On 5/22/2014 LipstickDiva said:
On 5/22/2014 circles said:
On 5/21/2014 birddrops said:
I would say $200.00. OMG $50.00 is really cheap these days!

totally agree....I would never give such a cheap gift...

And I would never be so rude as to tell someone their gift was cheap.

I don't recall telling someone their gift was cheap. To me these days, $50.00 is really cheap.

I am about to sign off for the evening, but this caught my eye. So I haven't read the whole thread (I will tomorrow). It was probably 15 years ago and I was at my brother's son's wedding with my girls, who were still young and struggling. I gave $100, and my girls gave $50 each (which totaled $300 from my family). I'll never forget my brother saying to me, "$100 is nothing anymore." I was really offended and wanted to say "then I'll give nothing." But I didn't. However, I did say that I didn't make six figures like he did, and why was her whole family seated near the bridal table while we were seated near a very cold exit door? It was actually two rooms separated by a long bar, and we couldn't even see the bride and groom. While I've always loved my nephew, he let her family make all the decisions, so I never blamed him. I was very surprised and taken aback at what my brother said though and it took me a while to get over it.

I can't imagine what the going rate is now, but I will read it tomorrow.

Formerly Ford1224
We must always take sides. Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim. Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented. Elie Wiesel 1986

Jannabelle · ‎03-09-2010

On 5/22/2014 Ford1224 said:
On 5/22/2014 birddrops said:
On 5/22/2014 LipstickDiva said:
On 5/22/2014 circles said:
On 5/21/2014 birddrops said:
I would say $200.00. OMG $50.00 is really cheap these days!

totally agree....I would never give such a cheap gift...

And I would never be so rude as to tell someone their gift was cheap.

I don't recall telling someone their gift was cheap. To me these days, $50.00 is really cheap.

I am about to sign off for the evening, but this caught my eye. So I haven't read the whole thread (I will tomorrow). It was probably 15 years ago and I was at my brother's son's wedding with my girls, who were still young and struggling. I gave $100, and my girls gave $50 each (which totaled $300 from my family). I'll never forget my brother saying to me, "$100 is nothing anymore." I was really offended and wanted to say "then I'll give nothing." But I didn't. However, I did say that I didn't make six figures like he did, and why was her whole family seated near the bridal table while we were seated near a very cold exit door? It was actually two rooms separated by a long bar, and we couldn't even see the bride and groom. While I've always loved my nephew, he let her family make all the decisions, so I never blamed him. I was very surprised and taken aback at what my brother said though and it took me a while to get over it.

I can't imagine what the going rate is now, but I will read it tomorrow.

Wow, isn't it supposed to be the thought that counts? When did weddings become money makers, if all someone can afford is $10 that should be accepted and appreciated...you were very kind Ford, I might have said, ok then nothing it is. ${#emotions_dlg.w00t}$

RainyDayGal · ‎03-09-2010

Ford - You're so right. Not everyone makes 6 figures, I think too often people forget that. Your brother was so rude, and $100 is a lot for 15 years ago. It's a lot for TODAY.

abbeythe 8th · ‎04-17-2010

On 5/22/2014 Ford1224 said:
I am about to sign off for the evening, but this caught my eye. So I haven't read the whole thread (I will tomorrow). It was probably 15 years ago and I was at my brother's son's wedding with my girls, who were still young and struggling. I gave $100, and my girls gave $50 each (which totaled $300 from my family). I'll never forget my brother saying to me, "$100 is nothing anymore." I was really offended and wanted to say "then I'll give nothing." But I didn't. However, I did say that I didn't make six figures like he did, and why was her whole family seated near the bridal table while we were seated near a very cold exit door? It was actually two rooms separated by a long bar, and we couldn't even see the bride and groom. While I've always loved my nephew, he let her family make all the decisions, so I never blamed him. I was very surprised and taken aback at what my brother said though and it took me a while to get over it.

I can't imagine what the going rate is now, but I will read it tomorrow.

Was her family seated near the bridal table because her family paid for the wedding?

glb613 · ‎03-09-2010

Any amount should be appreciated. A wedding isn't a money maker for the bride and groom. Complaining about the amount is being ungrateful and rude.

Burnsite · ‎03-10-2010

This thread shows more reasons than ever to opt out of the Big Wedding Production. It isn't done in my immediate family.

The divorce rate is over 50%. What is it with families who book huge venues for stale wedding food (sorry, I have never had good food at a catered event--it's always old and cold)?

An intern the family knows slightly? My goodness.

There is no obligation here at all unless the invitation is accepted. Then something is in order. And if it is a burgeoning friendship, of course the figures mentioned by the OP are reasonable and and she says, "not far apart."

But I can say that I have had former interns invite me to their weddings, and I just say "no" (and give them a smaller gift) because I don't really believe in all the wedding hype.

As Jane Austen says in _Mansfield Park_, from these customs one would think "there was never such a thing as an unhappy marriage."