Re: CHRISTMAS PARTY ATTIRE - POLL - Page 11

Tinkrbl44 · ‎08-23-2010

@JaneMarple wrote:
When did we as a society become offended at being asked to dress up at a host's party? I'm not that old that I remember the days when women wore a nice dress for a PTA meeting or to go out to lunch with friends. I've been to some really large beautiful and average size homes where everyone dressed up and did not feel uncomfortable. What is wrong with dressing up?

@JaneMarple

Amen, sister! I often wonder if it's because people are self conscious because they never learned HOW to dress properly for a variety of events .... or just have little or no experience wearing dressy attire.

Years ago, I seem to recall that most women had a variety of outfits for different occasions ..... I just can't imagine that people only have one type of outfit ... jeans .... and would actually stay home if an event was a bit dressier! What is wrong with people?

DiAnne · ‎09-22-2010

I am amazed at the amount of people who state they would not go to a party if they had to dress nicely. I look forward to the invitations that require "Festive Attire". I just assume if I am invited to an event around the holidays that festive attire would be the appropriate dress and that definitely does not require a cocktail dress.

RazorSharp · ‎02-20-2016

I'm curious about the people here who are griping about having to get dressed up and saying they wouldn't attend a party where a fancier dress code is requested. What do you people wear when you go to weddings or funerals? I would think these are standard life events that everyone would have something appropriate in their closet to pull out to wear. I would say those types of outfits would be comparable to what the OP was suggesting for her party.

Moonchilde · ‎05-23-2010

@DiAnne wrote:
I am amazed at the amount of people who state they would not go to a party if they had to dress nicely. I look forward to the invitations that require "Festive Attire". I just assume if I am invited to an event around the holidays that festive attire would be the appropriate dress and that definitely does not require a cocktail dress.

"Nicely", as has been amply demonstrated in this thread, is all over the map. That's part of the difficulty in a 'requirement' on an invitation. Nicely, Festive, etc. mean different things to different people and what you see in your mind's eye may not be what others see.

To some it might mean jeans or leggings and a sparkly Walmart tee with candy cane earrings; to others, a Quacker factory Xmas sweater/tee and velour Dream Jeannes - or velvet harem pants and a backless/semi-frontless silk top, or a $1000 LBD accessorized with a14/18K gold collection.

None of these things *aren't* 'nice' or 'festive' if you know your invitees. You need to have a good idea beforehand of the way your invitees dress as to whether you feel they will arrive looking "nice (enough)" for you.

Life without Mexican food is no life at all

Lipstickdiva · ‎03-10-2010

@Tinkrbl44 wrote:
@JaneMarple wrote:
When did we as a society become offended at being asked to dress up at a host's party? I'm not that old that I remember the days when women wore a nice dress for a PTA meeting or to go out to lunch with friends. I've been to some really large beautiful and average size homes where everyone dressed up and did not feel uncomfortable. What is wrong with dressing up?
@JaneMarple

Amen, sister! I often wonder if it's because people are self conscious because they never learned HOW to dress properly for a variety of events .... or just have little or no experience wearing dressy attire.

Years ago, I seem to recall that most women had a variety of outfits for different occasions ..... I just can't imagine that people only have one type of outfit ... jeans .... and would actually stay home if an event was a bit dressier! What is wrong with people?

Did someone say they were offended if they had to dress up? I don't recall seeing that. I saw a lot of posters saying they don't want to dress up for a house party but that's a lot different than being offended.

Many of us know perfectly well how to dress for various occassions. (How insulting to think otherwise.) However, some of us dress up daily for work and just don't want to do it outside of work. Some don't have the need for serious cocktail attire and would be buying a dress for one party only and consider it a waste of money or they don't have the money to do that.

stevieb · ‎03-10-2010

I like getting dressed up on occasion, but usually to go out and not to somebody's home. Of course, there is a middle ground and you could expect guests to dress in a more business casual style, which would preclude jeans and tee shirts, but also avoid fancy dress for the women and jackets and ties for the men...

In my pantry with my cupcakes...

Lipstickdiva · ‎03-10-2010

@Plaid Pants2 wrote:
@Sooner wrote:
@Plaid Pants2 wrote:
@Sooner wrote:
@Plaid Pants2 wrote:
If it were me hosting the party, I wouldn't have a dress code.

If I got an invite that had a dress code, I wouldn't attend.

Not everybody loves getting all gussied up.

Jeans does NOT = sloppy.

Thre are plenty of jeans that look nice.

How about at the party, the o/p can dress to the nines, and just let everybody else cime in what ever they are comfortable in?

Afterall, the party is supposed to be about enjoying each other's company, and not being judged in some sort of fashion show.
The problem therein is that some people are going to feel bad about how they are dressed. Some will be embarrassed about being over dressed and some will feel sloppy. Especially if they don't know everyone there well.

I had a terrible experience once with that. I won't go into details. . .

So, you are projecting your experience on to other people.

If everyone is having fun and a good time, then they won't worry about what they are wearing.

That's the whole point of a party, right? To have fun?
No, none of my friends would be having a really good time if it were a dressy party and they were in jeans, or if they really dressed up and everyone else was in jeans. Any of us would be embarassed and feel out of place. I would not be very happy with a host who planned a very casual or very dressy party and didn't give us a clue about what to wear.

I work hard at dressing appropriately for where I am going. I don't want to look like I don't know how to dress. I don't think most people would be fine and dandy with that.

The point of a party is for everyone to be relaxed and have fun--and how to dress is a big part of that for many of us. I'm sure not ALL of us.

One can "know how to dress", without there being a formal dress code.

I would be thrilled with a host who sent out invites, and there was no dress code specified.

It takes the pressure off of having to dress a certain way.

Even jeans can be dressed up.

For example, take black jeans, put on a nice top or sweater, and boots.

Ta-da! A nice outfit.

This girl looks nice for an evening out but she's certainly not in dressy attire or business casual. She's in casual attire.

Regardless of what some think, there aren't such thing as dressy jeans and there are places that jeans aren't appropriate. There are some jeans that are dressier than other jeans but "dress" jeans? No.

Most people that work in an environment where they have to dress in a certain manner, or they attend a significant amount of functions know that there are certain manners of dressing, depending on the event. And most people have sense enough to be embarrassed if they are dressed totally wrong for the occassion.

If someone was having a black tie event but didn't bother to put that on the invitations and someone showed up in "dress" jeans, they would stick out like a sore thumb, look inappropriate and I would imagine they would feel out of place.

OTOH if someone was having a backyard hoe down and someone thought it was a formal party and arrived in a cocktail dress and strappy sandals, again, they'd feel out of place and inappropriate.

Sooner · ‎03-10-2010

@RazorSharp wrote:
I'm curious about the people here who are griping about having to get dressed up and saying they wouldn't attend a party where a fancier dress code is requested. What do you people wear when you go to weddings or funerals? I would think these are standard life events that everyone would have something appropriate in their closet to pull out to wear. I would say those types of outfits would be comparable to what the OP was suggesting for her party.

I was thinking too that I always keep two or three outfits in my closet for a funeral or wedding, or dinner, or other occasion where I need to dress well. I ALWAYS keep two dresses and at least a black skirt or two. Good black heels as well.

I always have something more festive, either a top, jacket or something pretty, even a nice scarf to go over a black top or under a jacket. A pair of pretty shoes (often metallic) is ready too.

Some of us have a need for that, some don't. If I ask people to come over to eat or to have cake on Sunday afternoon, anyone I know would not make some effort to put on a nice top or change into a nicer pair of pants probably from what they would wear around home. It wouldn't be a question.

If it were really spur of the moment, I would say "Oh just come as you are! I'm in my jeans and t-shirt, so come on over and we'll (eat cake, have pie, have this chili I just made).

One of the most excruciating things on earth for me would be to go somewhere and not be dressed appropriately. I always want to blend in with others and not stand out by being under or over dressed. But that's just me. I don't like to make a scene and I don't want to be talked about. It's important to me.

RazorSharp · ‎02-20-2016

@Lipstickdiva wrote:
@Tinkrbl44 wrote:
@JaneMarple wrote:
When did we as a society become offended at being asked to dress up at a host's party? I'm not that old that I remember the days when women wore a nice dress for a PTA meeting or to go out to lunch with friends. I've been to some really large beautiful and average size homes where everyone dressed up and did not feel uncomfortable. What is wrong with dressing up?
@JaneMarple

Amen, sister! I often wonder if it's because people are self conscious because they never learned HOW to dress properly for a variety of events .... or just have little or no experience wearing dressy attire.

Years ago, I seem to recall that most women had a variety of outfits for different occasions ..... I just can't imagine that people only have one type of outfit ... jeans .... and would actually stay home if an event was a bit dressier! What is wrong with people?

Did someone say they were offended if they had to dress up? I don't recall seeing that. I saw a lot of posters saying they don't want to dress up for a house party but that's a lot different than being offended.

Many of us know perfectly well how to dress for various occassions. (How insulting to think otherwise.) However, some of us dress up daily for work and just don't want to do it outside of work. Some don't have the need for serious cocktail attire and would be buying a dress for one party only and consider it a waste of money or they don't have the money to do that.

@Lipstickdiva Not attending an event because you don't have the proper attire on hand or can't afford the proper attire is fine, but not attending an event because you don't feel like putting on the proper clothes means you've failed as an adult human being.

Tinkrbl44 · ‎08-23-2010

@Lipstickdiva wrote:
@Tinkrbl44 wrote:
@JaneMarple wrote:
When did we as a society become offended at being asked to dress up at a host's party? I'm not that old that I remember the days when women wore a nice dress for a PTA meeting or to go out to lunch with friends. I've been to some really large beautiful and average size homes where everyone dressed up and did not feel uncomfortable. What is wrong with dressing up?
@JaneMarple

Amen, sister! I often wonder if it's because people are self conscious because they never learned HOW to dress properly for a variety of events .... or just have little or no experience wearing dressy attire.

Years ago, I seem to recall that most women had a variety of outfits for different occasions ..... I just can't imagine that people only have one type of outfit ... jeans .... and would actually stay home if an event was a bit dressier! What is wrong with people?

Did someone say they were offended if they had to dress up? I don't recall seeing that. I saw a lot of posters saying they don't want to dress up for a house party but that's a lot different than being offended.

Many of us know perfectly well how to dress for various occassions. (How insulting to think otherwise.) However, some of us dress up daily for work and just don't want to do it outside of work. Some don't have the need for serious cocktail attire and would be buying a dress for one party only and consider it a waste of money or they don't have the money to do that.

@Lipstickdiva

Perhaps you are confusing my comments with someone else's? I just went back and re-read my comments you responded to, and didn't see anywhere that I mentioned "offended".

It must be someone else's comments.