Community Chat

[Plaid Pants2]

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@Sooner wrote:

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@Plaid Pants2 wrote:

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@Sooner wrote:

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@Plaid Pants2 wrote:

If it were me hosting the party, I wouldn't have a dress code.

If I got an invite that had a dress code, I wouldn't attend.

Not everybody loves getting all gussied up.

Jeans does NOT = sloppy.

Thre are plenty of jeans that look nice.

How about at the party, the o/p can dress to the nines, and just let everybody else cime in what ever they are comfortable in?

Afterall, the party is supposed to be about enjoying each other's company, and not being judged in some sort of fashion show.

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The problem therein is that some people are going to feel bad about how they are dressed.  Some will be embarrassed about being over dressed and some will feel sloppy.  Especially if they don't know everyone there well.  

I had a terrible experience once with that.  I won't go into details. . . 

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So, you are projecting your experience on to other people.

If everyone is having fun and a good time, then they won't worry about what they are wearing.

That's the whole point of a party, right?  To have fun?

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No, none of my friends would be having a really good time if it were a dressy party and they were in jeans, or if they really dressed up and everyone else was in jeans.  Any of us would be embarassed and feel out of place.  I would not be very happy with a host who planned a very casual or very dressy party and didn't give us a clue about what to wear. 

I work hard at dressing appropriately for where I am going.   I don't want to look like I don't know how to dress.  I don't think most people would be fine and dandy with that. 

The point of a party is for everyone to be relaxed and have fun--and how to dress is a big part of that for many of us. I'm sure not ALL of us.  

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One can "know how to dress", without there being a formal dress code.

I would be thrilled with a host who sent out invites, and there was no dress code specified.

It takes the pressure off of having to dress a certain way.

Even jeans can be dressed up.

For example, take black jeans, put on a nice top or sweater, and boots.

Ta-da! A nice outfit.

[insomniac2]

If I had to dress up in a fancy matter for a party, I wouldn't want to go.

[Iwantcoffee]

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@JaneMarple wrote:

When did we as a society become offended at being asked to dress up at a host's party? I'm not that old that I remember the days when women wore a nice dress for a PTA meeting or to go out to lunch with friends. I've been to some really large beautiful and average size homes where everyone dressed up and did not feel uncomfortable. What is wrong with dressing up?

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There is nothing wrong with dressing up. There is also nothing wrong with wearing what you like in your home and extending that courtsey to others.

If a host wants a dress code in their home it is their perogrative to do so.

As far as the question do people what to dress up to go to someone's home, I do not and do not have friends and family who tell me how to dress when I visit. It is not about the clothes, it is about spending time together because we enjoy each other's company. If what other people wear  is important to a host, that is okay too.

[JaneMarple]

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@Iwantcoffee wrote:

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@JaneMarple wrote:

When did we as a society become offended at being asked to dress up at a host's party? I'm not that old that I remember the days when women wore a nice dress for a PTA meeting or to go out to lunch with friends. I've been to some really large beautiful and average size homes where everyone dressed up and did not feel uncomfortable. What is wrong with dressing up?

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There is nothing wrong with dressing up. There is also nothing wrong with wearing what you like in your home and extending that courtsey to others.

If a host wants a dress code in their home it is their perogrative to do so.

As far as the question do people what to dress up to go to someone's home, not abI do not and do not have friends and family who tell me how to dress when I visit. It is out the clothes, it is about spending time together because we enjoy each other's company. If what other people wear  is important to a host, that is okay too.

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@Iwantcoffee No it isn't about the clothes BUT............... I see nothing wrong with asking people to drees nicely and put it in the invitation. It's not telling you how to dress but making a suggestion, sometimes I find our community much too casual. 

[cherry]

You know your guests, and we don't. If you think it wouldn't offend them, I guess it's ok. Everything is super casual today. Some people might not own the kinds of clothes you have in mind, and won't buy something they would never wear again just to attend your party.

[chrystaltree]

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@JaneMarple wrote:

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@Iwantcoffee wrote:

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@JaneMarple wrote:

When did we as a society become offended at being asked to dress up at a host's party? I'm not that old that I remember the days when women wore a nice dress for a PTA meeting or to go out to lunch with friends. I've been to some really large beautiful and average size homes where everyone dressed up and did not feel uncomfortable. What is wrong with dressing up?

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There is nothing wrong with dressing up. There is also nothing wrong with wearing what you like in your home and extending that courtsey to others.

If a host wants a dress code in their home it is their perogrative to do so.

As far as the question do people what to dress up to go to someone's home, not abI do not and do not have friends and family who tell me how to dress when I visit. It is out the clothes, it is about spending time together because we enjoy each other's company. If what other people wear  is important to a host, that is okay too.

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@Iwantcoffee No it isn't about the clothes BUT............... I see nothing wrong with asking people to drees nicely and put it in the invitation. It's not telling you how to dress but making a suggestion, sometimes I find our community much too casual. 

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      "Dress nicely" doesn't mean darn thing.  If I saw that on an invitation, I would have no idea what they were talking about since I always dress nicely.  Some people would be offended and they would be right to feel that way.   Generally speaking, if you are hosting a dressy affair, the invitiation would read "casual dress" or "semi formal" or "holiday wear".  I've seen all of those things.  Although "semi formal" is for big events at hotel or function hall these days, not house party.  I always stipulate "dressy casual" and I my guess know what that means.  But if somone shows up in jeans and sweat shirt...so what?  Everyone is still going to have a great time.  People go to parties for the food and the drinks and to socialize.  That's what the hostess should focus on, not telling people what to wear.

[chrystaltree]

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@Plaid Pants2 wrote:

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@Sooner wrote:

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@Plaid Pants2 wrote:

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@Sooner wrote:

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@Plaid Pants2 wrote:

If it were me hosting the party, I wouldn't have a dress code.

If I got an invite that had a dress code, I wouldn't attend.

Not everybody loves getting all gussied up.

Jeans does NOT = sloppy.

Thre are plenty of jeans that look nice.

How about at the party, the o/p can dress to the nines, and just let everybody else cime in what ever they are comfortable in?

Afterall, the party is supposed to be about enjoying each other's company, and not being judged in some sort of fashion show.

---

The problem therein is that some people are going to feel bad about how they are dressed.  Some will be embarrassed about being over dressed and some will feel sloppy.  Especially if they don't know everyone there well.  

I had a terrible experience once with that.  I won't go into details. . . 

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So, you are projecting your experience on to other people.

If everyone is having fun and a good time, then they won't worry about what they are wearing.

That's the whole point of a party, right?  To have fun?

---

No, none of my friends would be having a really good time if it were a dressy party and they were in jeans, or if they really dressed up and everyone else was in jeans.  Any of us would be embarassed and feel out of place.  I would not be very happy with a host who planned a very casual or very dressy party and didn't give us a clue about what to wear. 

I work hard at dressing appropriately for where I am going.   I don't want to look like I don't know how to dress.  I don't think most people would be fine and dandy with that. 

The point of a party is for everyone to be relaxed and have fun--and how to dress is a big part of that for many of us. I'm sure not ALL of us.  

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One can "know how to dress", without there being a formal dress code.

I would be thrilled with a host who sent out invites, and there was no dress code specified.

It takes the pressure off of having to dress a certain way.

Even jeans can be dressed up.

For example, take black jeans, put on a nice top or sweater, and boots.

Ta-da! A nice outfit.

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      Depends on the party and the person.  I wear outfits like that to work, I would not wear that to a holiday party unless it's an after work thing with my office buddies.  And even then, I'd layer on some jewelry.    I'd wear the jeans but I'd wear a sparkly top and metallic pumps for dressy casual holiday event.

[Financialgrl]

Add me as another that is for casual.  If I'm going to a party where I know the ppl, I'd dress like I know most others will dress.  If I'm going to family gatherings we are jeans/tee shirt kind of ppl and I'm way more comfortable with that. 

I am retired and one of the first things I did was donate all skirts and dresses - I have my middle of the road attire (black pants and the top is dependent upon how dressy I'm expected to get.  I travel a lot and go on a lot of cruises, lately I notice a lot of ppl in the buffet on formal night.   I like the idea of taking a poll from the women who you intend to invite but I know if I'm expected to dress up, I would decline the invite.

[Lipstickdiva]

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@SaRina wrote:

@Lipstickdiva, if "no shoes" wasn't specified to me beforehand, I'd leave. I think that would be very rude.

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We didn't know and it wasn't an option to leave because we went with other friends.  It just bugged me.  LOL

[Golden_Oldie]

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@Spinach2 wrote:

Hello everyone!  My husband and I are hosting a Christmas party for the first time in our new home and as a married couple.  I'd like the guests to dress up in dressy holiday attire.  He thinks it should be more casual and that guests don't like to dress up.  Well, as a woman, I sure love to dress up for the holidays.  I think guests would enjoy getting fancied up too.  What are your thoughts and do you like to get dressed up?

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Did you and DH go to any Parties with anyone you are thinking of inviting to your Christmas party? 

If so, do you remember how many were Casual or Dressy?

I always had a big Christmas Eve party, this is many years ago, the dress was what I called Casual. Designer Jeans, Silk top and comfortable slip-ons.

This is how my friends dressed, so there was no need for a dress code. Knowing the people you are inviting is a good start for a Party.