Community Chat

[depglass]

I can just relate a story about friends.  We all live in a secluded wooded area, 25 miles from the closest town in the UP of Michigan.  He came down with cancer and the kids wanted them home to "take care of them."  Well, they moved two years ago, he is still going strong, and they regret the move.  The kids are all busy and one daughter hires someone to take him to chemo every few weeks.  They sorely miss the deer, feeding the birds, and riding their ATV side-by-side in the woods. 

[libbyannE]

It sounds as if your mind was getting in the way, so the universe spoke to you in a decisive way. It always happens IF you watch for those signs. I won't bore you with my many stories, but signs have guided me for decades.

[dulwich]

Thank you Ladies very much for all your comments.

Arose  this a.m. and for the first time in quite a while I felt great with our decision and excited for our move.  DH and I have spent most of the day beginning our big 'sort out' which will go on for a while but we are totally on our way and feel good about it.

Again Ladies on the Community you are great in offering comments both for and against questions asked - much appreciated.

[esmerelda]

@dulwichI feel like I get "signs" all the time and have hunches, of course.

Glad you've come to a decision with which you are happy.

To you and anyone...please don't EVER let neighbors impact a life-changing decision.  Neighbors come and go; and I doubt very much they would base a life-changing decision on what YOU think.

[dulwich]

@Noel7  How interesting getting your ancestry done - where is your Welsh bit lol!

Maybe @Moonchild and I can coax you down to the coast for our cream tea - when we get there of course!  

[alicedee]

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@mac116 wrote:

When my MIL was getting older, she made the choice to stay in Ohio with her friends over moving back to where her whole family lived.  Fast forward...friends died, developed their own health issues, or moved to be with family.  She ended up very sad and lonely, and not well enough anymore to move back.  Oh how she regretted her choice! For most of us, family is more important. 

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I think there is much to be learned in this.   As long as you have a good relationship with your family...it makes good sense to live near them.  And if/when it gets to a point where you or Dh is in the hospital, assisted living or nursing home...you want to have family close enough to be able to there for you. You don’t  have to live next door....but within a reasonable drive just makes sense as you get older.  

Sounds like the Op and her husband are making a sound decision.  

[suzyQ3]

@dulwich, I don't believe in signs. I think that we see things as signs when we need to confirm our decisions. You now have that confirmation.

And if you are not familiar with our beautiful state, you have a treat in store for you. I wouldn't live anywhere else. :-)

[Annabellethecat66]

@tansy That's normal (for teenagers to only be interested in themselves and their friends).  Good grief!  I have wonderful grandchildren (several are teenagers, there are 7 grandchildren all together).

They love all of us but teens are notorious about being self-absorbed, obnoxious and on and on!  Ha!  Then they get hit with reality and most are brought down a notch (so to speak).  There are a few that slip by but not many.

I spend time with my teenage granddaughters.  They are engaging but they also bury their heads in the stupid iPhones too while I'm driving.

We usually park the car after going to various takeout places (everyone likes something different) and we sit in the car and talk and listen to it.

I learn all kinds of things from then (the latest songs, about my car, about my iphone and on and on).  But....I do slip in a little of 'your mom and dad are amazing' (and they smile and say, "Yes, Grandma, we agree".  Ha!

Kids these days have so much coming at them!  If an adult doesn't see it, they just aren't aware of what's going on!  

[Moonchilde]

Ohhh, @dulwich, I sooo sympathize re The Big Sort! When I moved here from LA, I had to get rid of 90% of everything. I no longer have an apt I can fill, but just one room. It was very difficult to get rid of cherished gew-gaws that made me smile but I just didn’t have room for. Two years later, I’m starting to think about tossing stuff I brought that I haven’t touched in the two years.

[Pearlee]

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@dulwich wrote:

Our big big move back to family in CA is now definitely upon us.  Our kids want us "home" and we miss them - so March is THE date.  

I have been blowing hot and cold, neighbors saying don't go, will miss you, you're silly to move back to family, you will regret it, etc etc.   Family calling come on back - and I have been praying to myself the last few days for some signs we are making the right move.

 Then just this weekend several things have happened one after the other  - which I will not burden you Ladies with - which reaffirms our decision that family is first, "friends" after.  Not mystical or anything just happenings that showed us where our priorities lie and we feel this is right.

We are now feeling totally secure with this right decision.  Amy of you Ladies 'suffered' this way?

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@dulwich  I don't have a response to offer to what you are asking (in my own life) but just want to say that your first and last sentences tell me you are absolutely making the right decision.  You miss your family out in California and you are now feeling totally secure that you made the right decision.   I'm glad, because major life decisions are dificult to make, and it's clear to me you made the right one.   By the way, I am certain you are the type of person who will make friends anywhere, so look forward to making new ones.