Community Chat

[VaBelle35]

Here's an example.

I signed up for a Wilton 3 class at Michaels.  I had actually taken Wilton 1 and 2 at a community college, adult learning program, not at Michaels.  It was much more money and we learned much more over a 12 week period vs the 8 classes at Michaels.

When I got to the Michaels class, the instructor singled me out because I was not in her first 2 classes.  Everyone in the class had taken the first 2 with her and I did not.  She told me that I couldn't be in the class because I had not taken Wilton 1 and 2 and I would slow everyone down.  I told her I had taken them. She said she would need me to show her my certificates before I could stay in the class.  I said I didn't have them with me, I didn't realize I needed to show proof.

She said she would "let me stay tonight" as long as I brought in my certificates the next class otherwise I would have to leave and request a refund.  She would not let me continue as I would hold the class back and her students were very good and learned very quickly.

So she starts the class by saying we are going to practice shell borders to get back into the swing of things.  She stands over me to watch my shells to see if I know what I'm doing.  I assume I pass this test as she moves on without comment.

The next night we are supposed to bring in a baked layer cake to decorate otherwise you can use styrofoam.

One woman comes in with a cake that is LITERALLY a container nof crumbs.  Her cake has completely fallen apart and the instructor spends about 20 minutes with water and flour trying to form these crumbs into something that can be decorated.  She finally gives up and goes out and gets her a styrofoam round.

My point here is that there are always going to be people in different stages of learning when you take classes for fun.  If people can't roll with it, then it's probably best to find a group that works for you.

I should have left that class, but the stubborn person in me wanted to show that instructor what a jerk she was for thinking I didn't know what I was doing.

Going forward, I took the rest of my Wiltons at community college.

[VaBelle35]

Yellow Rock info:

You will not find "yellow rock" in the documented square dance lexicon but it is a recognized caller command. Some square dance places of note, like the famous Fun Valley square dance resort at South Fork, Colo., or even our own humble Promenade Square here in San Angelo, have the symbolic "yellow rock" at the entrance to announce that "friendship is spoken here." No one is quite sure of the origin the yellow rock tradition, or even if it was, or is, peculiar to square dancing.

Myth has it that many kindred souls proclaimed that a friendly embrace was as precious as a boulder of gold, hence, the "yellow rock" tradition was born. "Yellow rock" is called, sometimes frequently, by many callers when dancers are assembled in a square and preparing to participate in a ?tip.' At hearing the command, dancers turn to their nearest ?nonpartner' dancer (their corner) for a brief but friendly embrace. It is a great icebreaker when there are unacquainted dancers in the square, and even if there aren't. It is the one universally recognized call for which no detailed definition is required.

[Lucky Charm]

@VaBelle35

Thanks!  I thought the OP did square dancing (also).

[dex]

@bonnielu@I just wanted to say that I sing all of the time and I am terrible... it makes me feel joyful and I am sure some are offended and some are amused when they hear me but I share this planet too.I think you should just dance for joy and be happy...never let anyone stop you.

[luvzchiz]

@VaBelle35

thank you so much for the explanation of Yellow Rock!    What beautiful meaning.  I'm going to share it. 

[LTT1]

@bonnielu

Reminds me of certain groups who play bridge.

[VaBelle35]

Or Bingo.  Talk about sucking the fun out of something.

[esmerelda]

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@bonnielu wrote:

Part of a social group who dances together.  Part of the process is lessons.  Seems there are some in the group who learn faster and decided the slower learners are in the way, holding everyone back.  Our age is creeping up on us, so we have been deemed "slower."  We are being targeted and "if we don't leave there will be those who quit, walk away and the group will fold.  The whole thing is bazarre.  At first I did not know WHO THEY WERE THAT WERE MAKING THE REQUEST.  I now know.          

How should we handle the situation.  We did leave to avoid confrontation and problems for our group leader.  But when we see these people around, how should we react to them.  We thought they were our friends.  And are saddened.  

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As usual I haven't read the entire thread.

Wow.  I don't think you should have left.  You aren't the one with the problem.  It's the others who have the complaint.  THEY should leave.

Is the group leader part of those who want you out?  S/HE should be the one deciding who needs to go.

So...they push you out.  Who will they target next?

[NYC Susan]

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@VaBelle35 wrote:

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@blueluna wrote:

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@TenderMercies wrote:

Go look in the Among Friends forum under the thread, “How would you react?”

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Yes that's the one I remembered @TenderMercies. 

@bonnielu

'How would you react?'

https://community.qvc.com/t5/Among-Friends/How-would-you-react/m-p/4418690/highlight/true#M212526

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Thanks for the link.  I, too, thought this was resolved months ago and she had resigned to go to another class.

Even if something is for fun, if you are learning something (another language, pottery, painting, etc.), if some are not progressing, then the others get bored and feel they are held back.

It's just the nature of learning in general.

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I agree.

Some classes are intended to be just recreational and fun, while others are more serious and for people who want to excel.  In my experience, dance classes in particular often fall into that second category.  I've taken many classes of all kinds, and it's always best to find out what kind of class it is and what the expectations are ahead of time.

I took a painting class once, just for fun, and I really struggled compared to the rest of the class.  I withdrew because I felt I was taking up too much of the instructor's time.  Everyone else was clearly either more artstically inclined or at a higher level.  (No bad feelings - The class just wasn't right for me.)

It seems in this case that not only friends but others also spoke up, and the instructor agreed with them.  We don't know enough about the friendships to really judge, but on the surface this doesn't seem like a betrayal to me.  Just an unfortunate situation.

[Mominohio]

I haven't read all the replies, but I will say, that people in general expect too much of the whole 'friend' thing. 

The vast majority of people in one's life really aren't your friends. They may be friendly, they may be enjoyable to be with, but when it comes down to brass tacks, most people we think are friends, will disappoint us at the very least, and throw us under the bus sometimes. We need to learn that 'friendship' doesn't really mean much in very many circumstances these days.

I have learned one thing, don't assume you know what has gone on, what was said, who did what. I'd come forward and ask straight out, voice my disappointment with them if what I suspected or thought was actually true, and I'd find others to spend my time with. I would not be confrontational but I'd look them in the eye and tell them how disappointed I was with their behavior.