Community Chat

[Jordan2]

So today is my first birthday without my mother who died in January. I don't tell you this to elicit birthday wishes, it is just a way to get my feelings out. I cried yesterday dreading today, it isn't very happy for me. My mother would always give me a card with money inside. We would disagree about the amount, she would want to give me too much. I would always give her back some, she would say you do so much for me you deserve it. Then she would say I want you to buy something nice and show me. It has been almost six months since she passed, while I don't cry everyday ( I am crying as I write this), it is still so hard. There is nothing like the love of your mother, she is always in your corner no matter what. I was watching the Macy's Fourth Of July show, Tim McGraw was singing a song I Called Mama, which made me cry, I wish I could call my mother.

[beckyb1012]

I understand your pain and it will get better.  My first without my Mom was on Christmas Eve, then of course the next day my first Christmas without her.  Then her first birthday to be gone was New Year's Day.  That week was almost as bad the time I lost her earlier that year in May.  She is still with you in your heart, but it is the hardest thing to not have our Mom's with us no matter how old we get.

[momoftwo2007]

@Jordan2  Thank you for sharing your memories of your mother on your birthday. Sending virtual hugs and love to you.

[threecees]

I am sorry @Jordan2. That is good to write about her and express all that

she meant to you. I am still lucky to have my Mom with me. I help her out

as much as I can.

[Bhvbum]

This has been one of the realizations I have had as an adult, I've lost my parents, my only sister, my husband, close family, good good friends, and it never gets easier.  I guess it's something you just don't realize is going to happen to you but it does.  

And I have another family generation growing up who will never know the great people we did.  I am sorry for you loss.

[golding76]

Jordan,

I am so sorry for your loss and understand your grief as I have lost my mother, too.

But we are joined by a couple other bonds.  I, too, lost an important and very close family member in January of this year, and today is my late husband's birthday.

So, I am feeling sad myself today.

You must be a lovely person since you have the same birthday as my dearest husband.  He was a joy.

Light a candle for your mother's soul (if this sort of ritual speaks to you) and try to feel her presence.  In my world and way of thinking, she is watching over you and is saddened by the fact that you are sad.

Try to think of your wonderful memories together and smile.

[Kachina624]

My mom will have been gone 17 years next month and I still miss her every single day.  There are a million gossipy things I'd love to tell her.  I can't help butwonder what both my parents would say about the mess in which our country now finds itself.

[Still Raining]

Please just treasure all your birthday memories.  They sound like nice ones that you will have forever.

It took several years until I came to terms with her not making me a cake, but now that is OK too.

[haddon9]

You are very lucky to have had a warm, close and loving relationship with your mom.  Not everyone does...I wish I had that. 

[Pook]

@Jordan2   It's a good thing to allow yourself to feel feel sad.  I know I start my birthday every year with a good cry and my mother died 1989.  Everything will be looked at as before and after but that is just how it is now.  Let it out and don't ever feel you need to get over it.