Community Chat

[Stelladorable]

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@Trinity11 wrote:

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@Stelladorable wrote:

I really believe there are some people who haven't been around children in decades. I suppose if you've never raised or been related to or had friends who have tweens and teens, it might be impossible to relate to how they think and act. I take that into consideration when reading some posts.

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I concur @Stelladorable . I read the responses and think to myself why bother replying. 😳

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For years and years we viewed kids as small adults. Now we understand through science that brain function is different. We executed children in the old days. Nothing makes me sicker except slavery.

You would hope now we know better we do better.

[Sooner]

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@Trinity11 wrote:

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@Stelladorable wrote:

I really believe there are some people who haven't been around children in decades. I suppose if you've never raised or been related to or had friends who have tweens and teens, it might be impossible to relate to how they think and act. I take that into consideration when reading some posts.

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I concur @Stelladorable . I read the responses and think to myself why bother replying. 😳

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I think a lot of it is how they are allowed to act.  

[Trinity11]

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@Sooner wrote:

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@Trinity11 wrote:

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@Stelladorable wrote:

I really believe there are some people who haven't been around children in decades. I suppose if you've never raised or been related to or had friends who have tweens and teens, it might be impossible to relate to how they think and act. I take that into consideration when reading some posts.

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I concur @Stelladorable . I read the responses and think to myself why bother replying. 😳

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I think a lot of it is how they are allowed to act.  

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No one knows what goes on in the homes of some of these kids. My adoptive brother was in and out of jail from a very early age. Nobody knew he was beaten and abused by a schizophrenic mom and a dad who beat him near daily. Nobody seemed to care. Often times the parents are simply unable to "parent." 

No one was more punished than my brother was @Sooner . He still acted out and became a raging alcoholic in the process. He lived what he saw in a home where no one seemed to realize what was going on behind closed doors. 

[Sooner]

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@Trinity11 wrote:

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@Sooner wrote:

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@Trinity11 wrote:

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@Stelladorable wrote:

I really believe there are some people who haven't been around children in decades. I suppose if you've never raised or been related to or had friends who have tweens and teens, it might be impossible to relate to how they think and act. I take that into consideration when reading some posts.

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I concur @Stelladorable . I read the responses and think to myself why bother replying. 😳

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I think a lot of it is how they are allowed to act.  

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No one knows what goes on in the homes of some of these kids. My adoptive brother was in and out of jail from a very early age. Nobody knew he was beaten and abused by a schizophrenic mom and a dad who beat him near daily. Nobody seemed to care. Often times the parents are simply unable to "parent." 

No one was more punished than my brother was @Sooner . He still acted out and became a raging alcoholic in the process. He lived what he saw in a home where no one seemed to realize what was going on behind closed doors. 

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@Trinity11 Yes. That is awful.  There aren't words to describe how awful it is and I am sorry for what you went through for your brother. And I know that I can't even imagine the horror. And that problem certainly needs to be addressed.  

But I just don't buy that a 13-year-old kid is not capable of knowing not to steal a car and run from the police in a 100 mph chase.  That's the issue I am addressing.  

They know enough to steal, rob, kill and do whatever these days--they need to know not to do it as well.  How?  I don't have the answer, but one needs to be found.   I don't buy saying that they aren't developed enough to be taught or understand.  

[Trinity11]

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@Sooner wrote:

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@Trinity11 wrote:

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@Sooner wrote:

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@Trinity11 wrote:

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@Stelladorable wrote:

I really believe there are some people who haven't been around children in decades. I suppose if you've never raised or been related to or had friends who have tweens and teens, it might be impossible to relate to how they think and act. I take that into consideration when reading some posts.

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I concur @Stelladorable . I read the responses and think to myself why bother replying. 😳

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I think a lot of it is how they are allowed to act.  

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No one knows what goes on in the homes of some of these kids. My adoptive brother was in and out of jail from a very early age. Nobody knew he was beaten and abused by a schizophrenic mom and a dad who beat him near daily. Nobody seemed to care. Often times the parents are simply unable to "parent." 

No one was more punished than my brother was @Sooner . He still acted out and became a raging alcoholic in the process. He lived what he saw in a home where no one seemed to realize what was going on behind closed doors. 

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@Trinity11 Yes. That is awful.  There aren't words to describe how awful it is and I am sorry for what you went through for your brother. And I know that I can't even imagine the horror. And that problem certainly needs to be addressed.  

But I just don't buy that a 13-year-old kid is not capable of knowing not to steal a car and run from the police in a 100 mph chase.  That's the issue I am addressing.  

They know enough to steal, rob, kill and do whatever these days--they need to know not to do it as well.  How?  I don't have the answer, but one needs to be found.   I don't buy saying that they aren't developed enough to be taught or understand.  

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It's called "acting out" @Sooner . My brother was an example of that until he ended up with a brain bleed in his early 50's and is now in a nursing home/rehab. A brilliant kid with an IQ of150. Kind, loving and talented he slipped through the cracks.

[stevieb]

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@Sooner wrote:

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@Trinity11 wrote:

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@Stelladorable wrote:

I really believe there are some people who haven't been around children in decades. I suppose if you've never raised or been related to or had friends who have tweens and teens, it might be impossible to relate to how they think and act. I take that into consideration when reading some posts.

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I concur @Stelladorable . I read the responses and think to myself why bother replying. 😳

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I think a lot of it is how they are allowed to act.  

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Probably so @Sooner  and I agree, 13 is old enough to know better. I wouldn't support a too harsh sentence for this, but yes, a bit more than taking away the cell phone and a week's restriction...

As for the boys cited who literally murdered playmates among other egregious offenses, there are so many questions, not the least of which is why a 14 year old boy has a 6 year old girl for a playmate. And sorry, those crimes were heinous and while upbringing clearly was dreadful and a contributing factor, the damage is done and no, 'society' should not be put at further risk. No matter the age, that level of pathology is not likely to be remedied. Still, if there are meaningful indications that it has been, there should be some mechanism for review, as unlikely as that might be. The fact that it was noted the family in the first case was stunned leads one to believe they though he would get away with murder. He didn't.

[Venezia]

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@TheMemphisVette wrote:

Bonnie and Clyde.....the pre-teen years

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@TheMemphisVette - LOL.  I hadn't read past the first post (the article), when I said the same thing to my husband!

[Trailrun23]

We tend to parent the way we were parented. Sadly, many kids are growing up with parents who are so self-involved they don't really give any guidance at all...so the kids just do what they have been around all their lives....just read about a 16 and 15 year old shot outside a Whataburger somewhere. Where do children get guns? From irresponsible adults. 

[Maggie Nolia]

Where were their parents?

[hckynutjohn]

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@Laura14 wrote:

I am ready for if your kid does a serious crime, both parents do the time society. Watch how fast that has an impact. I'm willing to give it a go. 

@Laura14 

Key words in your above post is "both parents". As one that was raised by a single mother, and born and lived in Public Housing Projects until I was 14. In that environment there was no such thing as "both parents".

Statistics show that 70-85% of youths in prisons come from fatherless homes. Plus, it says, they are 6 times more likely to live in poverty. 

I hear/see very little of this on any type of media. I wonder why this seems to be a taboo topic when it comes to crime.

After we moved out of the Projects, I kept in touch with quite a few that I grew up with as a youth. It was easy to see the difference in the disciplined and the undisciplined kids while growing up there.

As the years went by, more and more of the undisciplined, ended up in jails and in prisons. Our environments were similar, but how we were disciplined, seemed to be the difference.

You say "both parents", however according to these statistics, it would mostly be "parent". If that were the case, who raises that kid(s)? The County or State, or who or what entity?

Not saying any 1 thing is the answer, but with these kind if statistics! I would think it would wake up some of the ones in positions to at least talk about it.

Be well,

hckynut 🇺🇸

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