Among Friends

[DottieBlue]

What did this man do for a living?  I assume he is now retired?  He didn't make any friends with his former coworkers?  Never met any ladies he was interested in having a relationship with other than you if he asked you to marry him?

Too bad he wasn't more careful in the birth control arena when he had his one-night-stand.  I'm sick and tired of women being completely blamed for getting pregnant, which sounds like what this gentleman is doing.  If men don't want to become fathers, and then have to pay to support their offspring, they need to be more careful and take responsibility for where they put their s***m.  What was the reason why the mother "never worked"?  There is also her side of the story.  Just think, if his one-night-stander had gotten an abortion or given the child up for adoption his fun night wouldn't have cost him a cent.  Would he have preferred one of those options?

Am I allowed to be this blunt, or will my post get poofed?  Oh, well.

This man lives alone so he has alot of time to dwell on his life and think about how it turned out.  How old was the daughter when her mother passed?  I believe that effects children.  I wonder what her (the daughter's) side of the story is.

My questions are only theoretical, I'm not asking you to actually answer them.  You asked "whadda you think" so this is what I think.

[Puzzle Piece]

@DottieBlue 

The mother of the daughter passed away from bad eating habits and chain smoking.  Cancer.  The daughter was in her late 30's then.  She in her 40's now.  

I give him half the responsibility for getting into the life he lived.  She had two other girlfriends througout his years but they never seemed to be 'the one'.  He did support the daughter throughout her years of growing up.  What I found odd was the mother never married or dated anyone through the years.  She probably wanted to rope him into marriage.  She never wanted to work and wanted a man to support her. Yes, in the past before all this he did ask me to marry him.  

His stubborn pride and ego keeps him living the way he does.  

[CaliGold67]

He might be a cereal kihller.  Where else does he go late at night? Be careful. 

[CaliGold67]

If I were you I'd never give him my address - you know Nothing about him or his activities since 40+ years ago.  Do a background search - just because he tells you something doesn't make it True.  He's going to buy a car just to drive to see you??  That's Creepy don't you think?  If you HAVE to meet with him then do it in a restaurant halfway between. Or NOT at all.  I'm not being mean here but you must admit all this sounds like a Dateline episode waiting to happen. 

[DottieBlue]

@Puzzle Piece 

You posted that you give this man half responsibility for the life he has.  Who's responsible for the other half?  

Alot of women don't work outside the home and want a man to support them.  There is even a name for them:  Homemakers.  And alot of men are happy to oblige them.  I don't consider that a character flaw like this man obviously does.  But she must have been employed somehow--how did she pay for her smokes and "bad food"?

He is a bitter old man who is wallowing in self-pity because his one night of "fun" created another human being that he had to be responsible for, and he certainly didn't expect that to happen.

You sound like a very caring, kind-hearted person who has a soft spot for this man.  Why you want to get involved with him is beyond my comprehension, but good luck to you.

[Puzzle Piece]

@DottieBlue 

I don't want to get involved with him.,  I know he must be bitter and he's the one who didn't take responsible birth control actions in the past.  

The woman who had the child didn't work and she received money from the state.  A welfare recipient.  He provided for the child and she died six years ago from cancer in a home somewhere.  She was never a homemaker like you know them to be.  She didn't do much of anything.  

[RedTop]

Oh yea, I figure he needs help alright!  There's nothing wrong with living alone and entertaining yourself with TV, reading, and hobbies.  Pets can be great company and add to a persons inner peace.  

But, the few people I knew who had that many pets inside, had issues in their past similar to this guy.  Even tho they lived out in the country, their living conditions were noticed by mail carriers and utility workers who could smell the stench from the main road.  All it took was a visit from the Health Dept.  The people had to undergo mental evaluations, pets were removed by animal control, and the house was condemned and torn down.  This happened to a neighbor a few years ago.