Re: Wedding issue

shoekitty · ‎03-10-2010

Personally, I sort of resent brides dictating the length, and such of what you wear to wedding. Yes'm there needs to be a dress code which the bride sets. But, to require long gowns, is a little tacky IMO. Just saying. I have given weddings for my 3 daughters, and one granddaughter. I paid, they dictated. Only my granddaughter had her wedding in Malibu, noted on reception card, cocktail attire. She is 33, so... That includes a wide range of styles,. For most weddings, the venue of the wedding , time of day, and reception dictated itself. Everyone was appropriate at all weddings we had! Although we did have one dressed like a hoochie mama, lol,bless her buttons...it's just her taste. But, we were glad she came, hoochi clothes and all. lol JK
Most Modern brides, at least those in California and around here realize the stress strict dress codes have on guests, or they should. Do you know how many people decline to come because of the stress of dress codes? Sad? It is hard for a guest, often there are hotel costs, rentals, house sitters, plane tickets, gifts. Then add clothing.. that is once in a lifetime, to having hair, nails, shoes, etc done.
sorry to go off, but I do get a little put out. All in all, long pants or a midi dress you can wear again, with great jewelry, shoes and kimono, or shrug type thing is appropriate

ETA. by all means go. Just wear something you will feel comfortable getting. The advice on this thread is excellent. I had friend once who bought a long dress, and had it cut to above knee after wedding. Some dresses you can do that.

“sometimes you have to bite your upper lip and put sunglasses on”….Bob Dylan

foxywoods · ‎05-28-2010

@shoekitty I agree about the dress code + expenses. I'm attending a close family member's wedding next month. Black Tie optional but the bride is probably really leaning Black Tie period. Just knowing her family and the venue and she's a only and the parents have VERY deep pockets. I booked an AirBnB for 5 nights as my son, DIL and family are flying coast to coast and their flights are $$$. My flight is another expense. I have a long gown to wear, something I already own. Still need to find nice dressy shoes, but no high heels. A bit of a tall order. Low heels ones are a bit frumpy looking. 10 years ago I think I would be thrilled for all the hoopla but now...idk. have to get my hair done, I no longer color my hair. On the daily I'm fine with my gray, but this is an OTT event and I feel I need to look the part. The cut is one thing/color will be over $200 plus tip - IF I decide to color. Our side of the family is small so I feel the obligation to attend. My sister tells me "oh, think about it, you're making memories. hmmm yes my credit card is and will be remembering for quite a while!

CalminHeart · ‎03-09-2010

@shoekitty wrote:

I agree. My son is getting married in 3 weeks. She asked for cocktail attire so that can mean a lot of things and lengths. I'm wearing a fancy midi-length dress.

As I've seen over the years, people go to weddings in a lot of styles even if the bride asked for formal, full length, etc.

If I was you, I'd wear something dressy no matter the length and not worry about the rest.

ShopperL · ‎05-06-2012

Back from the wedding so here is the scoop:

My daughter didn't like my Isaac dress so I wore one that I got at Kohl's 8 years ago. People wore an eclectic mix of attire. Didn't feel out of place at all. The venue at the Adler Planetarium made for a great backdrop of the Chicago skyline.

Odd item: They didn't escort my MIL (the brides grandmother) up the aisle to sit in the front. She sat in the back with us. Then during the speech about departed loved ones missing at the wedding, they mentioned her! I'm surprised she didn't stand up and yell "Here I am". She's in her late 90's and has gotten very feisty in her old age. During speeches at the reception, the bride said that her grandmother promised she would stay alive until after her wedding. Now, this woman doesn't have any ailments. Still drives. She is healthier than my husband and I. But she wants to die and talks about it all the time. Don't tell us to take her to a psycharist. Her son who takes care of her is one!

CalminHeart · ‎03-09-2010

@ShopperL wrote:
I have a dilemma. I was invited to a niece's wedding (hubby's brother's daughter). I've seen her about 5 times in her life and wouldn't recognize her if I ran into her at a store. We are flying to the wedding, renting a car, staying in a hotel so this is costing a few bucks. Got a save the date card and it is a black tie optional event. The last thing I want to do is purchase a gown that I will only wear once. I just retired and funds are precious at this point. Would you purchase a gown, wear a nice fancy below the knee dress or some other option? I'm looking forward to seeing my other nieces and nephews at the wedding so I want to go. What are your thoughts?

No, I wouldn't purchase a gown. I might purchase a really dressy top and slacks or a dress if I was going.

I found an inexpensive T with sequins all over on Macy's that really dressed up a pair of ponte pants for a wedding.