Among Friends

[Annabellethecat66]

@TX-starlight As usual, everyone here has given excellent advice (in my opinion).

Here's mine:  Read all of them and incorporate in your response what works best for you.  

I think if you continue to be courteous but don't sound hesitant in your response, she will stop suggesting.  Hopefully, she'll be so busy she won't have room for you.  Ha!

[NYC Susan]

---

@Nataliesgramma wrote:

Doesn't sound like she is going to take 'No' for an answer....

I am having a simialr issue with 2 friends that retired and are hosting those "Home parties" or Avon to make extra money.....

I am getting the cold  shoulder since I am not buying..

---

I agree.  She's persistent, and when someone is like that, unfortunately we need to lay it on the line.  "I'm not interested.  I wish you well, but I really don't want to have this conversation anymore."  And then move on in a friendly manner to another topic.  If she brings it up again - "Let's talk about something else."  I think we have to stand up for ourselves, say it and mean it!  

Waiting for her to eventually get the hint is unfair to the OP.  She's bothered by this, and shouldn't have to endure it.  It's a waste of the friend's time too, so just wasted energy all around.  And it could potentially damage a relationship.  

Unfortunately, as you said, sometimes the result will be a cold shoulder.  If that happens, then I have to think the person was more interested in getting business than in being a friend.  So be it.  It's always best to know who our real and true friends are.  :-)

[NYC Susan]

---

@RedTop wrote:
The constant reminders are simply her way of trying to build clientele. I've never let my cousin touch my hair either, but I refer her to others often, especially to a few older people looking for someone who is willing to come to them.

---

I'm sure she's trying to build a pool of clients, but that doesn't mean it's okay for her to constantly annoy the OP (or anyone) about this.  The OP doesn't have to sit back and take it.  It bothers her, so she should speak up.

I actually thought of suggesting that the OP say she would refer friends, but then I thought better of it.  Is this new stylist good?  What if she's not?  What if the friends are unhappy?  I would never refer anyone anywhere unless I felt they would get excellent service.  

I also think it opens a whole other can of worms because then the OP will be bombarded with, "Are you giving out my number?"  "Have you referred anyone?"  "Your friend never came back.  Didn't she like my haircut?"  IMO the OP needs to distance herself from the whole business aspect.  It doesn't sound as though this new stylist-to-be is a close friend, more of an acquaintance, and she's already been annoying.  There's no reason for the OP to get pulled into it.  And plenty of reason for her not to.

(I refer people to my stylist all the time, btw.  He's always grateful, but has never once been pushy or asked me to do it or involved me any further than a simple and sincere thank you.  Personality plays a big part in this, I think, which is why I'm suggesting that the OP steer clear.)

[Mominohio]

---

@dulwich wrote:

I would simply say - thank you for your offer but at the moment I am not planning any hair salon changes but if I do, in the future, will definitely call you, again thanks for thinking if me.

Keeping it it friendly and replying - end of story.

---

@dulwich

Best answer!

Short, sweet and to the point. And if you have to keep saying, then keep saying it, just the same way, every time she hits you up again.

Should help out with the 'family' issues this involves.

[AuntG]

Anyone trying to build a client base does this. Just a simple no thanks (repeated often) is all that is needed. Weirdest thing about this thread is OP only having back of her hair cut by a professional while she cuts the front.

[TX-starlight]

@AuntG What's WEIRD about me cutting the front, or any part of my hair?? It grows weird & I don't want it butchered, as it has been in the past. I left a salon in tears about 10 yrs ago, I've been cutting it ever since. Nothing weird that I KNOW my hair. IF I could cut the back, I certainly would do that myself also. 

Tks everyone! Some good advice! I'm trying to ignore her as much as possible & I do realize she is trying to go into a new job WITH clientele "in tow". I might have to stop replying to her. I don't like hurting anyone's feelings. 

[cbrite]

Oh geeez @TX-starlight she wants to use you as the experiment......yikes 😲

[TX-starlight]

@cbrite Lol, That's what scares me!! 

[Warrior2022]

I was a stylist for 10ish years.  If I had to do it all over again, I would refuse to do friends and family.  I would tell her that you don't mix business with pleasure and wish her well.

[cbrite]

Make up something like a hair disease @TX-starlight ...or say your probation officer must be called first by her as you have a temper issue..... 😳 

Then wear that dinosaur costume....ought to do it.......😁