Reply
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,821
Registered: ‎09-16-2010

@wilma : My DH loves movies and all the old tv series. When he medically retired in 2011 turned the back bedroom into his tv room. He has two huge DVD and CD cabinet and a small cabinet plus boxes. The last time that I tried to clean the room discovered he has three copies of some sets🤷‍♀️ and WW111 and then some when I  suggested giving his best friends some . I am on a big purge but overwhelmed and feel like things are multiplying instead of shrinking. Trying to convince friends and family that we stop exchanging gifts and everyone said "no" 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️. Last week for my birthday, SIL gave me the huge lock n lock round and square cake containers. I tried to give them back to her and reminded her that now if and when I bake a cake it is in the 8X8  foil pan to eat and throw away. On Friday, hate to admit this but gave everything to another friend to sale since she has an on line business. Any other suggestions? Southern Bee

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,035
Registered: ‎03-15-2010

Re: Too much stuff!

[ Edited ]

@SouthernBee 

 

If I knew anyone who would take my stuff and sell it, that would be heaven!  

 

In a way, I have done that by donating some things to my local animal rescue.  They have several big fundraisers a year and my items did well in their silent auctions.  

 

The last time we were able to gather (back in February) at an event, I laughed when I saw that most of the jewelry they had for auction was stuff I had donated.  They are now trying to do it online for the first time, so not sure how it will go.

 

Most of my household items go to thrift stores, but I'd love to hand it off to someone who could make a little something for themselves.  It's a lot of work that I'm not wiling to do.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,619
Registered: ‎03-19-2010

I feel so weighted down by stuff.  Every drawer, closet, and space is filled.  I would love to just sell and move but so much stuff to deal with.   It feels like a weight on me.  I don't really care that much about the stuff since I cannot take it with me when I die.  My husband, however, loves stuff.  The garage is filled with stuff he might need.  He bought an air compressor and never have used it but he says they are very useful......I would love to live in a rented place with a minimum of stuff and stay on the go or be outside.   

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,536
Registered: ‎04-05-2010

@SouthernBee 


@SouthernBee wrote:

@wilma : My DH loves movies and all the old tv series. When he medically retired in 2011 turned the back bedroom into his tv room. He has two huge DVD and CD cabinet and a small cabinet plus boxes. The last time that I tried to clean the room discovered he has three copies of some sets🤷‍♀️ and WW111 and then some when I  suggested giving his best friends some . I am on a big purge but overwhelmed and feel like things are multiplying instead of shrinking..

 Trying to convince friends and family that we stop exchanging gifts and everyone said "no" 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

 Last week for my birthday, SIL gave me the huge lock n lock round and square cake containers. I tried to give them back to her and reminded her that now if and when I bake a cake it is in the 8X8  foil pan to eat and throw away. On Friday, hate to admit this but gave everything to another friend to sale since she has an on line business. Any other suggestions? Southern Bee


@SouthernBee  You can stop exchanging gifts, even if they don't! Just tell them you are stepping back from gift-giving, and then do it. If they insist on giving you a gift, just say thank you...then donate it or whatever. You will have made your wishes known, what the rest of them do is up to them.

 

We did this several years ago, and our wishes were respected. Some of the family members still exchange gifts, and that's fine. If they do it in our presence, we enjoy watching them be opened...and breathe a big sigh of relief that we don't have the craziness of all that shopping, wrapping, etc. for "stuff" that nobody really needs!

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,652
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

@SouthernBee @vermint , we stopped exchanging gifts as well.  So glad that is over.  I agree with Vermint.  Also, if you tell them their gifts will be donated they will get the message.  LM

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,357
Registered: ‎03-11-2010

I haven't had a chance to read all of the responses yet, but if anyone would care to join us, we have an ongoing thread over on the home forum called Declutter what have you purged today?

 

We post everything that leaves our houses, either donate, sell, toss, etc. All purges count, big or small. It really helps to keep each other motivated, and it also gives us ideas as to how to streamline our own homes. It is a great thread, please come by and join in!

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,357
Registered: ‎03-11-2010

@jeanlake - Your hubs sounds just like mine. I truly believe that both of his parents are hoarders, his mom for sure, and his dad really isn't much better. Maybe he's just that way from living with her all these years.

 

My hubby is much, much, better than them, but I too, will have to on ocassion hum the Sanford and Sons song to him, I've actually done it several times, and told him when it's looking like a junkyard outside his polebarn. He's usually pretty good about cleaning up if  mention it, but I try not to hound him unless it gets cluttered up for weeks/months and I just can't stand it anymore. 

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,915
Registered: ‎06-08-2020

Re: Too much stuff!

[ Edited ]

A lot of the problem with getting rid of things is that we think the things are good. We tell ourselves, "I will use it soon, someone else can use it, etc." Believe it or not, most of the time, no one wants our stuff. They may tell you yes, so as not to hurt your feelings, then keep putting it off, or avoiding coming to get it, because they don't have room for it either! You continue to hold it for them...willingly, knowing in your heart they truly don't want it. Then the anger begins to fester. The one thing that I'd like to share is that it is OK to just throw things away. At times, our idea of what's good, wearable, useable, in great condition, worth money, etc is skewed! "I'm going to have a garage sale, I'm going to sell at the flea market, I'm donating to Good Will, the homeless could use it. And then we continue to hold on to it anyway, maybe because the potential buyer didn't offer it's worth! ITS GREAT, when we do see these things through, but there are many with these intentions and then don't see them through!  We're stuck in the mindset that we have to make money off it, or someone else needs it and that's not always so. We need to form a new mindset, and that is to stop impulse buying, over buying, buying in bulk, buying cause it's so cute, buying for our family and friends and most of all taking from others, the things they don't want.
 I know it's easier said than done, but we all should be working on downsizing our belongings. The guilt is so strong when we are forced to do it, in the frame of mind we're in.

Can anyone say Marie Kondo? If you are not familiar with her, you need to google her method!

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,035
Registered: ‎03-15-2010

Re: Too much stuff!

[ Edited ]

@KBEANS 

 

Unlike my mother, I became fanatic about NOT saving things.  My husband will tell you I'm ruthless (and I am).

 

Have no interest in selling anything either.  

 

My impulse buying has gone down to nothing (thankfully).

 

My only problem is having the energy to box up and donate those things I need to get rid of.

 

I've done a lot, but it would be so nice to have help sometimes.

 

 

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,915
Registered: ‎06-08-2020

Re: Too much stuff!

[ Edited ]

@Witchy Woman wrote:

@KBEANS 

 

Unlike my mother, I became fanatic about NOT saving things.  My husband will tell you I'm ruthless (and I am).

 

Have no interest in selling anything either.  

 

My impulse buying has gone down to nothing (thankfully).

 

My only problem is having the energy to box up and donate those things I need to get rid of.

 

I've done a lot, but it would be so nice to have help sometimes.

 

 


My sister and I are like you. There are times we can recognize it and steer away from the behavior immediately. I don't want to fall victim to it! It's good that my sister and I can share our feelings and fears about it to each other. There is a very fine line in what one calls collecting and hoarding!