Among Friends

[MacDUFF]

@Sweetbay magnolia

As one of my distant relatives (Polonius) once said...

To thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man.

[Hooty]

My honesty, I am not fake, I tell the truth and most people cannot handle the truth, sad but true!!!

[LilacTree]

About the "looks" thing.  My beloved sister and I were both pretty.  However, she was outgoing and very popular, and I was not.  The difference was in our personalities.  I was shy and reticent, so I was perceived as a "snob."  It was pretty ridiculous because if anything I had no self-confidence at all.

On the other hand, Pat was open, friendly, and fun.  All the boys wanted to date her and all the girls wanted to be her friend.  She used to say she got tired of defending me and telling people I was not a snob, just very shy.

As I matured, I became more open and self-confident and my social life changed completely.  So it was never my looks, it was my personality. 

Now that I'm old, I have pretty much reverted back to my reticent, quiet self.  My disabilities don't help. 

One of the reasons I post here is because I can express myself so much better in writing than I can in person one-on-one.  Sometimes it still doesn't work, but it doesn't hurt anymore.

[2blonde]

No one (except old schoolmates) can believe me when I tell them how shy and lonely I was when I was a kid.  My ah-ha moment came when I was about 16.  A close friend told me that she was talking about me to another girl at school and saying what a nice friend I was.  The other girl said, "But she's so conceited."

Of course my friend defended me to her, but it dawned on me that by not saying "Hello" to kids in the hall and not starting conversations, they thought I was stuck-up.  I had such low self-esteem that I was afraid they'd reject me, and being very sensitive, I would have been crushed (really).

From that day forward I made up my mind to let the real Laura out and never hesitate to start a conversation or speak to a stranger.  I'm so glad I learned this while I was still young enough to enjoy the rest of my life and all the wonderful people in it!  I always make it a point to speak to people who seem to be excluding themselves from the group, and so many of them have shown me what a fun and beautiful people they are!

[spix]

OK, I'll try, I think I'm different with most groups, i.e., volunteering at O'Hare, I come across as very self confident because I know that I'm good at what I do, I can answer almost always any question posed by a passenger & it shows.  With neighbors I'm a neighbor, close with many in social affairs but just "hello" with others, former classmates a little silly & funny, other groups I socialize with I seem to not be different, it's just that another side of my personality comes out, with family & dear friends I'm caring, loving, supportive, etc.  I don't mean to say that I'm not like that with everyone, but it's most prevalent with 

I tend to be a little different with different groups, sounds weird but that's what it feels like to me, didn't really open my mouth till I was 30, maybe it was my self confindence got a boost, I do love being with people, friends, family, neighbors, etc but also enjoy my time alone, it's like re-charging

@house_cat, good post it does us all good to hear what others have to say about themselves

We are all unique, that's what makes the world such a wonderful place

[spix]

Don't know what happened, aborted post got posted along with the new one, oh well didn't mean to be so wordy but it is what it is

[AliJoi5]

Great thread.  I think I've always been pretty adept at expressing myself.  But, like anyone, I do occasionally still feel misunderstood even by those closest to me.  I would say that what I'd like most for people to "get" is that... behind my world weariness, skepticism, and apprehension, is actually an eternal optimist dying to be a believer, and someone with the very best of intentions.  But it can be scary out there y'all!  And sometimes it's difficult to recover from certain disappointments.  I think it's natural to want to self-protect.  Working through all of that is a life-long process, I've found.

[house_cat]

@AliJoi5

Great post. I feel very much the same.  My husband says I have a negative attitude.  I don't see it that way. I approach every challenge with a positive attitude, but eventually reality beats me over the head.

[AliJoi5]

lol!  Please never stop using words like derided @Sweetbay magnolia!! 

[SHIRAZ]

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@LilacTree wrote:

One of the reasons I post here is because I can express myself so much better in writing than I can in person one-on-one.  Sometimes it still doesn't work, but it doesn't hurt anymore.

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I completely agree with this!