Among Friends

[Mistreatedbycs]

So we've known each for years, she has a grown family and recently divorced after a number of years.  We see each other about twice a year sharing lunches and dinners for our birthdays.  Since her divorce we've seen each other for coffee and she helped me move and other little things.  I've always been grateful and repaid her with either a small gift or even an occasional get together quick dinner and said "I'll pay". 

I've asked her to help me this week and she said only if I don't talk about current events, I said "sure".   Now I'm thinking, what has changed, why can't I be just me, why would I have to limit my conversation to what she wants....I don't think I want her as a friend anymore...don't friends accept you the way you are?

[SXMGirl]

Ask her what subjects she does not want to talk about.  To me, current events = politics.  If that is what she doesn't want to talk about, then be a friend and respect her wishes.  I never discuss politics with anyone except my husband.

As we get older, it is more difficult to find friends.  To have a long-time friend is a blessing.  Before you make a regrettable decision, find out the facts.

[reiki604]

During the coming week, any discussion of current events can become very contentious if you don't see eye to eye. Her request may be because she may suspect her views are different than yours or is simply tired of everything. Long time friends should be able to discuss many other things. 

[Annabellethecat66]

You either go by what she wants or just be TOO busy and put it on hold until after the election (that's probably it).

It doesn't mean anyone is right or wrong, maybe she just thinks you'll disagree and is trying to prevent an argument.

I'm lucky all of my friends think like I do.  So do my Drs and dentists.  Ha!

Now my family, totally different there......I try to avoid them but what am I going to do?  They're my kids!  Ha!

[QVCkitty1]

These days I only discuss politics with like minded friends. At this stage no minds are going to be changed, and your friend may be like me, very nervous about the outcome.

[happycat]

I was thinking current events also. She may just be sick to death of hearing about this election....She wouldn't be the only one.

I would think twice before cutting all ties with her though. I have an old friend who can drive me nuts, but we are always there for each other when the going get rough. Been friends for nearly 40 years. Thats a bunch of secrets!

[Annabellethecat66]

I've decided I'm either going to be very happy or spend all of my time telling my adult children, "I told you so" every time they complain about something.  

[GCR18]

I wouldn't over think it.  If she says it again, ask her what's up.  

[Desertdi]

Divorce is no picnic.   Your friend may be having difficulties she just doesn't want to share.

[Moonchilde]

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@reiki604 wrote:

During the coming week, any discussion of current events can become very contentious if you don't see eye to eye. Her request may be because she may suspect her views are different than yours or is simply tired of everything. Long time friends should be able to discuss many other things. 

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That would be my assumption - she just does not want to talk politics right now. I think few could blame her. Whether she knows your politics, you know hers, or neither of you really know each others, it's so very divisive at this time in our history. 

She may have friends who do it a lot lately and she's sick of it, period. She may or may not have an inkling yours is different than hers and just not want to deal.

It's just bad manners to discuss politics, period. Unless your political views and your right to express them are way more important to you than the friendship, I'd respect her perfectly sensible wishes.

We all have views. We don't all feel we need to express them; having them is enough.

ETA that it doesn't appear from your OP that you value her friendship very much at all. If you did, I can't think her simple comment would have you thinking as you say you do.