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Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,373
Registered: ‎04-10-2012

The big and unavoidable things i would prob tell them....

the smaller things i try to handle myself...

Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,296
Registered: ‎01-02-2015

My husband and I have the opposite problem ....the kids calling us with

their problems ... I am supportive of course .. but then worry !!!

Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,656
Registered: ‎03-13-2010

I tell them the truth.  My husband and I are 70.  We are active and in excellent health.  We do have minor aches and pains that come with age but if we do get sick or have issues, we always let them know.  We have three boys and they live nearby so we talk to and see them several times a week.

 

@Calcgirl sorry your son responded in such a rude way.  Very inconsiderate on his part. 

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,054
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

I'm not certain what the OP's comment about her child being "quite affluent" has to do with how much he cares.

 

I do tell the truth to DS. 

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,454
Registered: ‎01-13-2013

@Carmie Good one!

 

@LindaSal But they were checking on you with daily texts. A bit different than OP's situation.

 

@Calcgirl That's hurtful. Do you have other grown children?

Honored Contributor
Posts: 18,415
Registered: ‎11-25-2011

What should the response be?

What ‘trouble’ is there?

Why is the detail of being ‘affluent’ mentioned?

Additinally, why is the detail of the DIL being a ‘rather selfis (sic) woman’ mentioned?  

 

Sounds like you’re very self-sufficent, without any issues.

A MRI/fluid on the knee is a fairly minor issue to someone

who is fairly healthy & living by themselves.

 

Late 60’s is still fairly young.

I would say....pick your battles. 

 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 32,624
Registered: ‎05-10-2010

I tell them how I feel,  I tell them what's going on.   Did I miss something here?   

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Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,170
Registered: ‎07-18-2010

I guess I think of it in terms of what do I want to hear from them when I ask the same question. It isn’t just the answer that one time, but the accumulation of answers year after year.

 

I want my family to know that this is what adults do, and that I can take care of my physical and emotional issues.  

 

 I feel I am still teaching them this is what it means to be an adult. 

 

Certainly if it is a major issue I would let them know, but not before I had done everything I could to get it resolved.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 17,491
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

1.  Texting leads to all kinds of misunderstandings.

 

2. If you've always just said "things are fine," and then send him something that isn't fine, you can't control how he interprets that.

 

Hopefully the next time you talk on the phone you can clear up the misunderstanding.

===================================
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# IAMTEAMWEN
Honored Contributor
Posts: 18,778
Registered: ‎12-12-2017

Dear calcgirl, I am appauled by his response.  I am a very spiritual person and a strong believer in karma.  The lord says vengance is his and no one can do it better than him.  He will take care of him in his own way.  You've heard "what comes around goes around" and it does.  I've seen it happen so mant times.  I would call or text him and tell him that he hurt you badly with that cruel response.  He owes you an appology.  If you need him to take you for some tests, tell him.  If he isn't there when you need him, cut him out of your will.  Sorry, he has really made me mad.  Gods blessings, SC