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12-19-2021 05:10 PM
My very earnest Christmas wish is....I have a talkative relative. She doesn't say, excuse me can I break in here?or anything like that. She just butts right in and we're off to the races.
This being Christmas I'm going to let it go but in a few weeks I'm going to have a talk with her, as tactfully as I can. I never know how she's going to take what I say so for now I'll let it go because I don't want to spoil my grandchildrens' holiday. But after 10 years of this, it's tme for a meeting of the minds.
12-19-2021 05:17 PM
Bless your effort @PuppyLoverBob666 but I don't think it will be well received. I know a non-stop talker who thinks everyone loves her (and her stories), when in fact, people try to avoid her. Her husband is a quiet and helpful person so everyone tolerates her for his sake. She demeans everything he says and does. I can't imagine how badly she would fly off the handle if approached. Think over what you'll say and be prepared for verbal lashing.
12-19-2021 05:25 PM
@PuppyLoverBob666 Don't expect miracles. She's probably a Susan Graver type with no impulse control. Look at the criticism she's had and the good it's done. Maybe it would be better to stop her when she interrupts and say, "excuse me but I'm speaking". That will usually stop someone dead in their tracks and it's not rude.
12-19-2021 06:12 PM
@PuppyLoverBob666 wrote:My very earnest Christmas wish is....I have a talkative relative. She doesn't say, excuse me can I break in here?or anything like that. She just butts right in and we're off to the races.
This being Christmas I'm going to let it go but in a few weeks I'm going to have a talk with her, as tactfully as I can. I never know how she's going to take what I say so for now I'll let it go because I don't want to spoil my grandchildrens' holiday. But after 10 years of this, it's tme for a meeting of the minds.
@PuppyLoverBob666 I can't think of any tactful way to say "You talk too much. SHUT UP!" which is probably what she will hear.
I would either beg off, make your time with her short or live with it. Nothing good can come of this.
12-19-2021 06:37 PM
@PuppyLoverBob666 I agree with @Kachina624 . If you say anything else be prepared to never see her again. Maybe that's what you want
12-19-2021 06:51 PM
You are calling this "a Christmas wish"? There are too many that would like to "wish away problems". I have listened to "wishers" much of my working life. To this point I have yet to see much change because someone "wished".
Wish i had more money/friends/better job/more time/less weight, and hundreds of others.
Personally I have never been a wisher, even with the Turkey bone. Always look at the most direct approach to get to what I want to try to change. Most times it takes a lot of time and a lot of hard work to achieve those things.
Same with people, I go as directly to them as possible. Don't care if it's a superior at my work place/local government officials/friends or relatives. Many of those " higher ups" may not like what I have to say, but most I have dealt with respect my choice of approach.
Why you have waited 10 years and call this a "wish", I haven't a clue. When I saw the title of your thread, I expected something like "World Peace" or "Good Health to all". What you said in your post does not fall into what I categorize as a "Wish", sorry.
hckynut 🥅🏒
12-19-2021 07:00 PM - edited 12-19-2021 07:02 PM
And what gives you the "right" or duty to FIX her?
Everybody, including you, has faults! We are humans!
12-19-2021 07:49 PM
Have you considered the fact that she may have a hearing deficit and isn't aware that she is interrupting?
12-19-2021 08:46 PM
I suggest you look within and ask yourself what YOU do that bothers others and remedy that before asking anyone else to change.
12-20-2021 08:31 AM - edited 12-20-2021 08:34 AM
@rcfan wrote:Have you considered the fact that she may have a hearing deficit and isn't aware that she is interrupting?
@rcfan Nope. I have a hearing issue and have always been able to, if nothing else, see someone's body language or lips moving. With discreetly placed hearing aides in both ears for many years, these non-stop talkers and interrupters are passed annoying.
My cousin has always done this and begins with "You'll love this story"...or "This is so funny". I like to judge my reactions for myself. The stories go on and on neither funny or loved.
The way I handled the situation is to tell her that others would also like to have a chance to speak, so can she please take a breather. No, she hasn't cut it out and I have to repeat it each time we're together, but it works...temporarily.
***Many people are nervous or uncomfortable in social situations and this is their way to get the floor.
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