Loneliness - Perspective? - Page 2

qvcaddition · ‎03-10-2010

@deepwaterdotter wrote:
What behaviors can be shown to let the lonely person know that others care?

Give an actual phone call, not a text. Take them to lunch, or a walk if they can. Check in with them.

qvcaddition · ‎03-10-2010

@Mom2Dogs wrote:
I have a friend that is lonely, needy, bored, etc.... and there are plenty of people that care for her. Unfortunately her constant neediness is driving people away.

Yes, you are right on this, but I am speaking in my post above about people that want company or someone to care and do things with, not using them like the person you are speaking about.

You can spot a user.

Desert Lily · ‎06-24-2011

@JoyFilled Warrior What specifically could someone do to reach out to others?

Smile at them, say hello, meet them for lunch, listen, text/call, visit, buy them a pet, or?

What would really help relieve a person's loneliness or emptiness?

Would someone continue to implement the reaching out, or would it be a "moment"?

I think it would take a commitment to help the person, or they might feel even worse if it were fleeting. A smile or hello they can get at the grocery store.

To whom would someone reach out? Do you already have someone in mind?

If not, how would you find them?

I think the idea of reaching out has great merit, but I also think that it's complex.

And if a person is alone a lot, the feelings of isolation & loneliness are inevitable. Daughters & sons might care, but if they live 1,000 miles away it's not going to help loneliness.

Snowpuppy · ‎03-09-2010

Since I've been here I've learned about the "I don't bother anymore" culture. This was new to me.

Also learned the extent of some posters lives is a recent FB post or YT influencer video.

I was always the friend who tried to stay in touch with a call or a card in the mail. So if a friend or former colleague of mine no longer keeps in touch, I now understand why.

I take a clue from them and now just stay away.

Shanus · ‎05-17-2010

@JoyFilled Warrior I get it. I was in business doing makeup on those who wanted a change and then it morphed into weddings/brides on weekends until it became too much. I cut back to 1/2 time and hired assistants. It was still a huge adjustment not having a set schedule and my calendar no longer had some place to be each day.

My DS lives close by, but I wait for him to ask to get together. They have busy lives with both working and my now teen GDs. My DD is near Seattle and we're more phone or texting 'buddies" than seeing each other. It's a long flight and airport turmoil for me now.

DH is still working with a day or two off during the week until tax time, but it's not the same as friends I've had who are now in retirement communities, assisted living, passed away, moved to be near their children or other family. Many are dealing with illnesses or pain and just want to be left alone.

Yes, I get lonely even though I do keep busy with my painting and now packing up to downsize a bit late at our age. I become fearful of what I'll do when something happens to DH. I depend on him too much. He's my "social life" after 55 yrs. Sometimes it keeps me awake worrying about that. I was awake at 4 AM this morning.

It's good for you to know you're not alone here.

Greeneyedlady21 · ‎01-06-2015

@deepwaterdotter wrote:
What behaviors can be shown to let the lonely person know that others care?

Speaking from my perspective, a person who needs actual help and not platitudes, you offer them actual help if you are able to. A place to stay, a loan when they are a hardworking person person-whatever you can do. Especially when other people have hurt them so much that they have lost the ability to trust, that's another cause of loneliness.

And you ( please know that I'm saying you as a general term not you specifically) don't abandon them because you're afraid they're going to ask you for actual help.

You're a wonderful person for asking this question, so many people never do

"Those who do not remember the past are condemned to repeat it.”

Cakers3 · ‎06-17-2015

@JoyFilled Warrior

"Loneliness does not come from having no people about one, but from being unable to communicate the things that seem important to oneself, or from holding certain views which others find inadmissible." - Carl Jung

"There is an illusion of connection: you think that with technology, with these devices, you can connect. But you cannot really connect. How can you connect with another person when you cannot connect with yourself? - Thich Nhat Hanh

Come home to yourself first.🙏

"" Compassion is a verb."-Thich Nhat Hanh

RetRN · ‎10-01-2013

@katie1859 wrote:
We live in a tragic time and loneliness is expanding
It is a suffering that is heartbreaking
It is a breaking that knows no bounds and is a respecter of no persons

Loneliness has become an epidemic in our country. This is a topic not to be taken lightly.