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08-29-2019 06:00 PM
@Shanus wrote:@NAES1 I’m so sorry for the losses you’ve endured. I hoping the pleasant memories of the times you shared with them will keep them in your heart and mind forever.
Shanus 💕
Thank you, @Shanus .
I believe 'THAT' one piece surely did touched many with their family, friends, and for myself, and for the indefinable count of medical patients that I have seen daily, almost on any floor, either to be struggling with their death coming slowly, or the emergencies that were fatal from many different happenings~
The sharing, from ECBG was quite beautiful.
I usually avoid posting anything negative, but I have often spoken of my mother( dying at an early age) to recently, my father ...and did chime in how I felt about death from a closer 'feel' this year as silent from the last dates. Yes, it comes in waves.
Shanus, what I do remember from this board six years ago, was a mother whom had come on explaining to many through Among friends of her 19 year old son, William that needed a kidney transplant, a heart transplant, along with a surgery for a type of colon resection, and liver transplant that was a match for both kidneys.
Many of us followed that WAIT PERIOD for over four months each day. And, right up to the evening the medical team finally found a replacement for the both kidneys. William died hours before they began that night. That is what really what tugs at my heart.
Shanus, I am fine and will remain quite satisfied with all that I have been given in this life. I cherish my friends that cares for each other beyond words.
You give so much to everyone, and always illuminates such a bright light. What an intelligent lady you are.
I can and certainly do acknowledge how nature thins out the population with the older having worn bodies and loss of organ function, but speaking of my father and mother was a typical remembrance for that dates- those days.
Thank you so very much for a blessed post.
You are such a special lady with a heart of gold for so many others.
Never let that trait waiver thinking that no one reads, but instead remembers you.
NAES
08-29-2019 07:16 PM
@NAES1 Thank you for acknowledging my reply with such a heartfelt and beautifully written sentiment. You are truly a special lady. Be blessed.
Shanus
08-29-2019 09:22 PM
My memories are never far away. How can they be having lost a son my baby at 47 years old. He passed last January after being in ICU for eight days. I didn’t think I could discuss it here but an incident that happened about four months ago made me change my mind. A woman I know casually asked me if I was over it. I couldn’t speak. Just shock my head. She has a son about the same age. How could she. I will never understand. My husband and I are heartbroken.
08-29-2019 09:41 PM
@Catiele wrote:My memories are never far away. How can they be having lost a son my baby at 47 years old. He passed last January after being in ICU for eight days. I didn’t think I could discuss it here but an incident that happened about four months ago made me change my mind. A woman I know casually asked me if I was over it. I couldn’t speak. Just shock my head. She has a son about the same age. How could she. I will never understand. My husband and I are heartbroken.
@Catiele ...(((Hugs))). It amazes me every day the ignorant things people say regarding the loss of our loved ones. You NEVER get over it. I am so sorry that woman hurt you like that.
08-30-2019 05:39 AM
@Catiele wrote:My memories are never far away. How can they be having lost a son my baby at 47 years old. He passed last January after being in ICU for eight days. I didn’t think I could discuss it here but an incident that happened about four months ago made me change my mind. A woman I know casually asked me if I was over it. I couldn’t speak. Just shock my head. She has a son about the same age. How could she. I will never understand. My husband and I are heartbroken.
@Catiele - I truly hope that you will continue to seek the comfort of others, and in your heart, forgive those who speak carelessly and most likely, just cannot understand how you really do feel.
I also hope that you are able to find at least some small sense of consolation in the comments of the wonderful folks who have shared here, and who are standing with you in your sorrow and walking with you in it.
I find that in posts posts like these, there is both a beautiful anonymity and at the same time, an empowering intimacy, and to me this is the internet at its most helpful and kind.
Although I will most likely never know you in person, I do know that whatever brought you and me together this morning, I know only too well where you are, and I extend to you thoughts of comfort and peace and remembrance.
08-30-2019 11:19 AM
When I opened this thread and saw what it was about, I didn't know if I could read it. I also didn't know if I was ever going to share this here, but now is as good a time as any to get this out and off my shoulders.
My husband passed away unexpectedly eight weeks ago. I certainly never thought I would be a widow in my 50s and have (possibly) so many years ahead of me without him.
I have one young adult child still living at home, and I don't know what I would be like if he weren't around. I have wonderful friends, but no one can possibly know what it is like until they've had to live it. I know I sure didn't.
08-30-2019 11:24 AM - edited 08-30-2019 11:26 AM
@catwhisperer wrote:I recently lost my husband unexpectedly. Relatives and acquaintances keep asking me if I am okay, "Hope you are good", "Hope you are doing well".
REALLY??? You expect me to be doing okay/good/well???
To avoid questions, I just say that I'm fine. The truth is that I am barely functioning and have all I can do to get through a day.
@catwhisperer Let me first say how sorry I am. I'm also sorry that you find others remarks to you as being insensitive. You know that people become uncomfortable talking about death. Your relatives and acquaintances are only trying to comfort you. You know that, right? Please accept their remarks as they were given, with caring and compassion to you.
08-30-2019 11:32 AM
@VanSleepy wrote:When I opened this thread and saw what it was about, I didn't know if I could read it. I also didn't know if I was ever going to share this here, but now is as good a time as any to get this out and off my shoulders.
My husband passed away unexpectedly eight weeks ago. I certainly never thought I would be a widow in my 50s and have (possibly) so many years ahead of me without him.
I have one young adult child still living at home, and I don't know what I would be like if he weren't around. I have wonderful friends, but no one can possibly know what it is like until they've had to live it. I know I sure didn't.
@VanSleepy , I am so sorry to hear of your recent loss. How devastating for you and your children. There really are no words to ease your pain, so I just want to wish you comfort in the memories you shared.
08-30-2019 11:44 AM
@ID2 wrote:
@catwhisperer wrote:I recently lost my husband unexpectedly. Relatives and acquaintances keep asking me if I am okay, "Hope you are good", "Hope you are doing well".
REALLY??? You expect me to be doing okay/good/well???
To avoid questions, I just say that I'm fine. The truth is that I am barely functioning and have all I can do to get through a day.
@catwhisperer Let me first say how sorry I am. I'm also sorry that you find others remarks to you as being insensitive. You know that people become uncomfortable talking about death. Your relatives and acquaintances are only trying to comfort you. You know that, right? Please accept their remarks as they were given, with caring and compassion to you.
@ID2 ...thank you. Yes, I know they care and are trying to comfort me. I am just super sensitive right now. Then on occasion I will get that person who feels the need to tell me what I should be doing or not doing. SMH.
08-30-2019 11:55 AM
@VanSleepy ...I am so sorry for your loss. (((Hugs))).
If you like to read, may I suggest two books that may be of comfort to you?
The first one is A Widow's Guide To Healing" by Kristin Meekhof. The second one is Widow to Widow by Genevieve Davis Ginsburg.
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