Among Friends

[Imadickens]

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@schindy wrote:

I'm sorry for everything you are going through.  I don't think "move on" applies, you will learn to live in what has been referred to as "your new normal".  I have been through a few rough roads as well;  my father died when I was 8, my mom when I was 21, divorce after 25 yrs of marriage and the worst of them all - my son was murdered 8 yrs ago.  

I personally will never move on, I am trying to get through each day - one day at a time.  

Please give yourself time to grieve for the losses/changes in your life, and don't put expectations on yourself.  If you are up to it, try to keep busy and lean on your friends/family for support.  

Sending prayers and hugs to you .. 

 I pray God will continue to send you blessings! You are proof that humans, women in particular can do anything! I could handle (barely) losing my parents that young. I'd live with a divorce. But, I think life's cruelest joke is making a mother bury her child! Especially after such a horrid death! You are an inspiration to us all just for waking up each day! Anything beyond that that you do is nothing short of heroic! On top of it, you care enough to try to support others and lift us up! You are truly God's own!

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[Imadickens]

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@Havarti wrote:

It was this very experience in life that taught me our memories are not in those things, but alive a well in your heart and your mind.  We had a wonderful time sharing memories about even the littlest of things, like mixing bowls that mom used to whip up the batter & frosting for our birthday cakes, or the measuring stick that was used to mark our height each year just as the school started, or the baby jars that dad used to store assorted nuts, screws & bolts.  If only I had a nickel for every time we said “I remember” as we sorted through their household of treasures.  For me the actual hardest thing was walking out the door for the last time and turning my back to walk away.  But it was also the moment that I knew the now empty shell of their home had not held the memories, all those memories where going out the door and down the walk with me.  There were no treasures in my hands, they were all in my heart.  You will get through this and you will still have all those memories to last your lifetime.  Hang in there!

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Very nicely said! You are quite wise! 

[Imadickens]

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@Moonchilde wrote:

Don't think about there being a time frame. Take things one day at a time. Grieve when you need to. Lean on others when you can. Be kind to yourself.

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Please let others help you if they offer! If you need something you have to say so, people aren't mind readers!🤔 As for time, I felt badly because I didn't cry! I was sad, but didn't cry. Then, one night ten years later, I saw a movie and thought about my mom and cried ten years worth! So, everyone is right. There is no "suggested"or "normal"  timeline for grief. Grief doesn't even have to be a sad thing! Grief is a personal thing. Like Burger King, have it your way!😉

[Imadickens]

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@NameAlreadyTaken wrote:

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@Mistreatedbycs wrote:

Never thought it would be this hard to actually move on.  Loss of parents, house being sold, furnishings being sold, lots of memories but it's really hard.

Some things in life need to be easy but this is not one of them.

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My faith got me through this.  My husband buried his father on mother's day and his mother on father's day, the same year.  You need a good support group either from family, friends, neighbors and/or your church friends.  You might need to express to those whom you trust in those groups your feelings of overwhelming loss.  So many people are so willing to help if they only know you need it.  I offer my prayers for you this evening.  

Dear Heavenly Father, please lift up your child, who is suffering deep feelings of lonliness in grief  and loss.  Lord,  I don't need to tell you.  You know her heart.  Lord, I ask you to lift her up, release the feeling of being crushed to the depths of her soul, a feeling she alone cannot shake.  

She, as many of us have felt when facing the loss of loved ones, feel as if a part of us has died.  Please lift that darkness and give her the strength to face tomorrow and tomorrow give her the strength for the next day, to take one day at a time, through your love for her.  Guide her through this storm so that she may be able to help others in the future who will face the same.  Lord, we know you give us time in which to spill our grief and in that time to gain our strength and the ability to reflect on the wonderful memories  and not the grief.  In His name, we ask this for your child.  Amen.

Amen, indeed!

[NicksmomESQ]

My mom passed 15 years ago & I still haven't totally gotten over it!! We were very close.She adored my husband & son!! I find myself talking to her constantly!!

I find strength in knowing how important we were to each other! We talked a lot before she died & we got to say it all.She told me that I was more than she could have hoped for in a daughter.She wanted me to be strong & go on,not just for my family but for myself!! She said "there is no forever,but love lives on"!! I told her that I would love her forever!!.

Since mom passed I've made a point of telling my son that I love him each night before he goes to sleep!! He says it to me as well!! My husband & I make sure we verbally express our love to each other everyday!! We want nothing left unsaid! 

I've learned that it's not important to have a lot of family & friends.It's important to have quality relationships. 

Mom's loss has gotten easier. But there is a hole in my heart that will never heal.Her memory keeps me going! It fills my heart with love & compassion for others!! I want to do good & have a great life because I still want to make my mom proud! I promised her I would!!