Friends and doxie - Page 3

doxie1 · ‎03-09-2010

Wanted. Man to take care of cow that does not smoke or drink.

(What? now I have to worry if the cows are smoking?)

3-year-old teacher need for pre-school. Experience preferred.

(but not much)

Our experienced Mom will care of your child. Fenced yard, meals, and smacks included.

(smacks..what more could I want?)

Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try us once, you'll never go anywhere again.

(That is what I am afraid of)

Illiterate? Write today for free help.

(Let see how this works Sparky)

doxie

Panda lady · ‎05-09-2015

In first grade, we teach children about zoo animals. I am going to have to remember those elephant jokes. My kids will love them! Thanks! Keep these funnies coming. Sure brightens my day!

doxie1 · ‎03-09-2010

I am still wondering if the milk products I consume come from smoking cows.

doxie

Panda lady · ‎05-09-2015

Are those milk products "utterly bovine" ?

doxie1 · ‎03-09-2010

moolicious too!

doxie

doxie1 · ‎03-09-2010

These are actual newspaper headlines gathered from papers across the country.

Squad Helps Dog Bite Victim (What?)

Shot Off Woman's leg Helps Nicklaus to 66

Enraged Cow Injures Farmer with Ax

(Do NOT make the cows mad)

Plane Too Close to Ground, Crash Probe Told

(What was your first clue sparky?)

Miners Refuse to Work After Death

(The nerve of them)

Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant

(That is one way to handle it)

Stolen Painting Found by Tree

(Now that is a smart tree)

Two Sisters Reunited after 18 Years in Checkout Counter

(Were they using coupons?)

doxie

doxie1 · ‎03-09-2010

I have been awol for a while due to losing my little heartbeat of a dachshund. She is greatly missed and I need some laughter.

doxie

doxie1 · ‎03-09-2010

War Dims Hope for Peace

(Ya think?)

If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last a While

( Are you sure Sherlock?)

Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures

(Are you related to Sherlock?)

Red Tape Holds Up New Bridge

(That may be a bridge that I do not want to cross)

Dear Kill 17,000

(spell check didn't help you)

doxie

Panda lady · ‎05-09-2015

@Doxie wrote:
I have been awol for a while due to losing my little heartbeat of a dachshund. She is greatly missed and I need some laughter.

doxie

Hope this makes you smile, dear friend!

Marriage is like a deck of cards. In the beginning all you need is two hearts and a diamond. By the end, you wish you had a club and a spade. Re-pinned by L. B. Sommer, author of 199 Ways To Improve Your Relationships, Marriage, and Sex Life. http://lollygagging.net/

shosh · ‎03-09-2010

so sorry about your girl, doxie.

seems almost all of the threads i posted on are gone, hence my 60 something post count.

right before the change, you had 2 posts i think, about school kids who were writing their own ending to old sayings- i had copied them, as i sometimes do with your jokes, to pass along- but forgot to paste, and it seems the thread is gone- anyway, if i am recalling right, and you know what i mean, maybe you could post them again.

it seems hard for many of us to find our way around here, lots of holes, but i think i can find this thread again now. maybe different people will be seeing your thread in this mish mash board.

i try to read the board everyday but rarely get on to post.

i don't suppose you have heard anything about richie?