Among Friends

[jeanlake]

I think we all had pictures of people flash across our minds when you shared your frustration. That behavior is neurotic, needy and controlling from a caring person. My older sis.... I gently explained one day that she is stating the obvious consistently with me. Teased her and said I need a safety phrase, and I do. YOU'RE DOING THAT THING AGAIN. In a restaurant, airplane, movie, car -- doesn't matter where. She'll tap you to make sure you're listening. And I'm nuts by then and begin counting her taps. She isn't listening so we're spending less time together. Boundaries.  

[mistriTsquirrel]

---

@ALRATIBA wrote:

Sounds like my sister!   She has advice for everyone / everything.  "You know what you should do?"

We just say okay and ignore the advice.  No use starting a war over it.

---

I wish that worked with my sister.  You can't just say okay and have it be done.  She will badger you and badger you and badger you.  Even if you say, "yes," "I know," "I get it," etc., it doesn't put a stop to the badgering.  Then when you finally get tired of it and ask her to stop badgering you, she flies into a rage.

Honestly, I don't know how she stays employed.

[Elri]

@TX-starlight

My guess is:  "She ain't never gonna change!" LOL

I have a friend I say that to all the time. Just love her for what she is.

[Citrine1]

---

@chickenbutt wrote:

---

@Citrine1 wrote:

Trust me, being a Scorpio has nothing to do with it.  I'm one.  I never tell people what to do.  

---

Heya Citrine!  Me too! 

---

That's right, I remember that now.  In fact, don't we even share the same day?  Mine's the 6th!

[cherry]

She is who she is, and so are you. If you value her friendship, and she is fin,e in all other facets, I would say nothing

It really is a small matter ,and not worth losing a friend, or hurting her feelings over. I'm sure she thinks she is being helpful, and really cares about you

[qualitygal]

---

@kittyloo wrote:

how about instead, thanking her.  Say, gee. i hadn't thought about that, or " i'll keep that in mind, next time" she just says it, because she cares about you.  Maybe her husband does that to her all the time. 

---

I so totally agree with this approach!! and yes, husbands do this too. Feel the love.

[CherryHugs]

OMG I would never sleep with a cough drop in my mouth! That is dangerous.

[ALRATIBA]

---

@mistriTsquirrel wrote:

---

@ALRATIBA wrote:

Sounds like my sister!   She has advice for everyone / everything.  "You know what you should do?"

We just say okay and ignore the advice.  No use starting a war over it.

---

I wish that worked with my sister.  You can't just say okay and have it be done.  She will badger you and badger you and badger you.  Even if you say, "yes," "I know," "I get it," etc., it doesn't put a stop to the badgering.  Then when you finally get tired of it and ask her to stop badgering you, she flies into a rage.

Honestly, I don't know how she stays employed.

---

@mistriTsquirrel

My sister is a lawyer, and badgering comes naturally to her!  But, it isn't that bad for us!

[jeanlake]

@mistriTsquirrel  Do we have the same sister, and would that make us half sisters? Ha. I do love and respect my sis, but I had to tell her in 2016 --- I am not your punching bag. Things have been a bit 'off' since then, but oh, my, she can badger with the best of them. Everyone's different and each person has their limitations.  

[Nataliesgramma]

Probably not likely to stop....but Good Luck anyway!