Among Friends

[ECBG]

As a former HS teacher, I would urge you not to move in your daughter's senior year where she would lose her peer group. 

She would be in a strange city, a strange school, and very much alone, assuming she is happy where she is presently.

She would have no friends to help her adjust unless she already knows people.  At her age, friends are at the very top of their list.  She still has her senior prom, graduating with her friends, and a diploma where she has belonging.

When they go to college, it's different.  Everyone in the freshman class is new.

[Allthingsgirly67]

I’m a former middle school teacher but she is adamant about going sooner rather than later. Weirdly they have their prom in 11th grade. I asked what do you do in the 12th grade? She replied they have a banquet ( which sounds like another word for a prom).

[Allthingsgirly67]

I have a medical retirement pension. I can also transfer to the store where I’m currently working and receive very close to the NY pay I’m getting here.

[CalminHeart]

There are may ways to find a reputable realtor in the destination city. Facebook is definitely not where I'd go. Too many scams etc. 

[magicmoodz]

@Allthingsgirly67 

I would not necessarily write off Facebook entirely. My city is exploding with new apartments. I love to look at facebook ads for new apartments that so thoroughly show the outside/grounds of the building as well as unit floorplans, inside unit galleries and common areas such as party rooms, workout rooms, conference rooms, etc. They also list prices for each floorplan

These ads can give you a great snapshot of whether or not you would be interested and if the price is within your budget.If so, you can then call the management office and conduct business over the phone.

[EastCoastGal]

@Allthingsgirly67 ... l really don't mean to be snarky but isn't this the third time you've posted about this? I thought you would have moved by now especially since you've said your husband or ex-husband is not a nice person and you and your daughter wanted to get away from him. I think you're having a hard time deciding what to do. I do wish you luck!

[Snowpuppy]

I'm not sure how the OP is planning on moving if she doesn't have the money for a househunting trip.

Many landlords now ask for proof your income is at least 3X your rent.  A co-worker left for NYC last fall. Nice building in Manhattan.

They had to show they earned 5X their rent in income. Rentals in many areas are tight as people are waiting to buy.

[roeroe1005]

I relocated from NY to DE four years ago.  I was already retired at the time, but I knew I would look for a part time job, if even as help to get a social life started.  I was lucky to find a job pretty quickly.  I now actually work 2 jobs - part time in retail and on call in our local school district (I am a retired secretary).

A few months before my move, I started looking by googling apartment rentals in the area that I was interested in.  I knew I wanted to rent while I figured out things.  When I moved, I came down with a blow up bed and very little furniture as I did not know what I would find for an apartment. 

A suggestion for you, besides what has been given by others, is to check out Zillow.

My cousin lived in this area at the time, so I spent a weekend and we drove around looking at places.  I had my list of what I wanted to look at.  I actually fell in love with the first place I saw.  I'm still here 4.5 years later.

As you have a child in school, you may want to work backwards and find a good school district and then figure out where to live.  Again, google, google, google.  Meet with the Principal & Guidance Counselor. Senior class should have a lead teacher or sponsor who runs senior activities.  They may be a good person to introduce yourself and your daughter.

I had a similiar issue with family.  My cousin and her husband had been here about 10 years when I moved here.  I knew they would help if needed, but I could not expect them to be my be-all.  I would just have to put on my big girl panties and figure it out.  Now they have moved back to NJ and I'm here by myself.  I have made a little life for myself.  

It's a tough decision, your's certainly more than mine was, but I wish you luck, patience and happiness.  

[Allthingsgirly67]

Your kindness and insightful words are appreciated and heartwarming. Yes I do google and the blow up bed sounds like a great idea. Congrats to you and your success.

[Alsace Gal]

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@Allthingsgirly67 wrote:
Your kindness and insightful words are appreciated and heartwarming. Yes I do google and the blow up bed sounds like a great idea. Congrats to you and your success.

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Bon courage, it take a brave and strong woman to make the changes you're making.

I'll be doing the same later this year to a different country with my Reilley (🐶). 
I wish you well and much success.