Mom to Mom

[rms1954]

Depends on the situation; but if I taught either one of them I would expect they would do proper thing.

[chrystaltree]

If we're talking s few months until they save to move out on their own, no.  Buy on a permanent basis, they would have to contribute to the household either monetarily or in the form of work.  When my nephew and his family were with us; they were paying off credit card debt so in place of rent; his wife did the housecleaning and cooking.  They also brought some groceries.

[Kachina624]

@bargainsgirl.  There have been several previous threads on this topic, one quite recently.  Here's a link you might find helpful.

https://community.qvc.com/t5/Community-Chat/How-Do-You-Handle-Young-Adult-Children-Living-at-Home/td...

[CalminHeart]

One of my kids moved back in for 3 months while he fixed up his house. It didn't occur to me to charge him rent. He was adulting, needed a little assist and I was glad to give it.

I would not allow a grown child to move in long-term unless there was a very very serious reason. Even then, they'd have to be an adult, work, take care of their own kids, cook, clean, etc, just like they would if they lived on their own. I'd expect some financial help with food and utilities.  

[Major Shopper]

@bargainsgirl From the time I got my first job, as a 14y/o, my dad collected "rent" from each of my paychecks. Let me tell you, I was not happy about that!

When I graduated from high school he gave me all of the money back complete with interest that was earned as he had invested it for me!

Maybe you could do the same for your child as a forced savings?

They will appreciate the nest egg you present them when they move out. 

[Carmie]

No, some of my adult children and their spouse and kids lived with me for a while.

I never charged them a cent or made them buy groceries.

They did help around the house and did yard work...on their own to help out.  They did their own laundry too.

We lived with my parents  twice...one right after we got married and again with kids when our house was being built.  My parents never charged us.

We also did the chores and yard work without being asked. 

[ScrapHappy]

My husband and I were discussing this.  We;;, have been as our daughter will be going to college Fall 2024.  Even though were agressively saved for college, she'll still come out with some student debt.  She's already received 3 acceptances (waiting for 3 more) and one acceptance is her out of state reach school.....Cha-Chang$$!  We've already told her that she could live home afte college, rent free.  Pay off student loan and we will help with that too.  I've always told my daughter, the door is always open and you can always come home.  

[m0rgan]

When I turned 18 (77now) my parents charged us rent to prepare us for being out on our own.

We did not go to college, we worked right out of high school.  We did not know but she opened a savings account in each of our names and saved the rent payments and used that money for special things for our weddings.  Lesson learned and bonus.

[ruthbe]

currently we have 2 adult daughters live with us.

one of them has a job...she contributes every month for food.  As soon as the other one gets a job...then both will contribute for the following...food, car insurance (they do not own their own car...it is under our name and we currently pay the insurance), cell phone.

they need to start to learn what it is like to have regular bills every month...to budget for them...they are adults...they need adult responsibilities...they don't need to be treated like children.

the only reason why the one daughter currently is only contributing for food is she is the only one with a job... it wouldn't be fair to charge one and not the other. 

(we are working with the other daughter regarding getting a drivers license and a job)

[pdlinda]

@Major Shopper   I think your father is a GENIUS!!  From what you posted, I'm assuming the "windfall" you got at the end of your stay at home was a SURPRISE??? 

That's simply an amazing way to instill financial health and security in the life of a child (including an adult child).

My father got me into the habit of getting $20. extra in cash every time I go to the grocery store where "cash back" is available.  I've done that FOR YEARS and at the end of the year I make a one-time deposit into my savings acct (usually over $1,000).  During the COVID siege, I got my groceries delivered (and sometimes still do) so my "stash" was affected; however, I still do enough grocery shopping on my own to keep my cash drawer growing.  It means a lot to me knowing that no matter what happens in the news, I always have a considerable amt of cash at my disposal should I need it.