Wellness

[vsm]

@gellenI am sorry to hear about your suffering.  As you've already learned, complaining to neighbors is not the answer.  There is a lot of help available to you --   what does your doctor say?

[Lovemymaltese]

@LiveLaughLove Good suggestion!  I would add a good multivitamin and B12.  When taking medications it depletes your body of B12. B vitamins help with your mental health.  Andrew Lessman which QVC sells are good vitamins. Or go to his website at procapslabs.com. They have CS that will help with your questions.  Sending you hugs!

[minimalistWF]

@gellen  I'm so sorry to hear of your sadness.  Please know that you matter in this world and what might feel right now like it is helpless can literally change overnight.  It is easy to feel overwhelmed and stuck, but I like to think of it as one foot in front of the other and one step at a time.  Maybe you can't fix all of your sadness and regrets right away, but you can make small steps in the right direction.  What are one or two small things you can do today to create some momentum and change for you?  

You can't change what happened in the past or your regrets, but you can change the course for your future.  If friendship / companionship is what you crave, then look into local community or online ways to connect more with others.  If you want a romantic partner possibly, you could even start meeting people online, even just to give it a try.  Online stuff can be scary ... I'm in my mid-30s and still feel a bit of anxiety about online dating / meeting people, but once you tear off the bandaid you just never know ...  I don't know your age, but many people have lost spouses or gotten divorced and they already have previous children, etc. where you could even be part of an instant family.  Just please do not give up hope!

Like others have said on here, talk therapy might be a good option for you.  Places like Talkspace, etc. have therapists that can video chat, text or email you.

All the best to you!  

[qualitygal]

I think we all have our ups and downs during this time.  The other day I got knee deep in recipes.  

Do you have any interests at all, that you can get involved in and just lose yourself in?  I think that's a lot of it.  Books to read, recipes to try, something where you safely can help someone else?  Call someone on the phone, watch some videos, or movies or both on t.v.??  

Can you create things?  

I hope so, get your head into something of interest.  Can you visit your library?

[Mindy D]

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@gellen wrote:

I havse posted before about my severe depression - four months now.  I can't seem to get any elief - I live alone and really can't handle it anymore.  there are no other living options.  It is is quite difficult tobe older, severly depressed and alone   Have you found a way out if you have been in a similar situation?  My neighbors are also quit unsympathetic so no help there.  Thanks in advance.   It makes me feel even worse to be in bed on these loely fall days.  I somehow have managed to get to my part time job - 8 hours a week.

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@gellen I have it. We spoke before. Are you seeing a psychiatrist? It can sometimes require trial and error to get effective medications and it can take time. Don't give up. Depression is a biochemical disorder and the medications can help. Don't expect too many friends or family to understand or have sympathy. They can be very uninformed. The physiology of depression is not something they know about. I'm sending you the biggest hug I can. 

[I am still oxox]

Have you sought the help of a professional, chating here on line can only do so much if anything.

You need a therapist and your Internist needs to get involved too

[hckynut]

@gellen 

No 2 legged kids in our house either, but we do have 5 furry kids. I got married when I was 63, first and only time. Told you part of my story in my other post. While in the mental hospital I was diagnosed with: Clinical Depression and Anxiety/Panic Disorder.

Now, question! Do you have any pets? 

hckynut 

[ROMARY]

I believe that there are free gov. sponsored hotlines where one can chat, express feelings, etc.

Check out your local state or county for free hotlines, and  Senior services, etc. 

The best of luck to you.   Many folks are feeling the same, especially during these Covid circumstance. 

[Annabellethecat66]

@gellen Depression runs in my family.  From all I’ve witnessed in my own family, I can tell you that the fact that you are reaching out would mean you truly want to live and be happy.  That’s a very good thing.

I once saw an interview with some psychiatrist who’d written a book on helping others.

He said one thing he noticed was that his patients that didn’t have an outlet and friends they could reach out to didn’t improve.

He ran down a list of some of the outside activities he’d talked people into joining.  In joining the activities ( I remember birdwatching was one of them) the people found great comfort from this group.

Look,  I know it’s very difficult to want to be around others.  But you obviously WANT to feel better.  My sisters (3 of them) went thru more psychiatrists and psychologists than I could count.  But they kept looking and eventually ound one that ‘fit’ for each of them.

I’ve experienced several close family members who killed themselves.  When they did it, even though we’d been around depression most of our lives with each person others always commented “We had no idea”.  Suicide ( and that’s what you are alluding to) is a quick decision.  

Most of of the time those that failed said “ I’m glad I’m still alive and was saved”.  

Look, first you need to find a good psychiatrist.  You and the doctor will come up with a plan that works best for you.  Often it’s a chemical imbalance.  He can help with that.

These people who aren’t offering up an ear to listen or their time, aren’t friends.  A true friend will always offer a stretched out hand ...or even better stretched out arms for you to fall into.

You can get better but it’s going to take a combination of several things...and the one ingredient to all of it is YOU.

There are so many people who feel like you do, especially now.  With all that’s going on and that virus, it’s hard to feel upbeat.

Here’s one of my many mottos:

”I’ve been given 24 hours to use as I wish.

When the day is done, I hope I don’t regret the price I paid for it”.

My daughter’s boyfriend’s mother is a manager of a library where I live.  She once told me that people would be surprised the number of people who came to the library asking for books on depression.  She said as she talked to them, she was able to give them self-help groups to join.  Groups that shared their hopes and fears, sadness and what made them want to fight to enjoy life and experience happiness.

Please reach out ( like you are doing now) but with people in your life and get the help that’s out there for those who are willing to work for happiness.

You DESERVE to be happy.  You are worth it.  Remember that.  Find at least one person you can be honest with.  Open up, talk to people.

Just yesterday in Walmart I met two exceptional people.  Each time I stood in the aisle talking and sharing ourselves with each other.  

One conversation started in the toilet paper aisle.  It lasted about 10-15 minutes.  We talked about yes, toilet paper, the virus and laughed together.

The second was with a gentleman who was much younger than me.  It turns out he’s going to school to become a person who fixes air conditioners.  He has 4 children (ranging in age 24 to 10).

He grew up in the same town I did.  We listed streets I haven’t thought about in years.  We talked about how rich people are pushing out affordable housing for others.  I think I spent maybe 20 minutes with him.  Before I left him I said “My names Linda”.  He said “that’s my sisters name”.  He smiled and “Hello Linda, I’m a David”.

Before the virus I would have hugged each of these people, but now all we could do is wish each other good health and happiness.

That’s what I wish for you.  Come here and let us all know how you are doing.

You see, you’ve already made friends here who care about your health and happiness.

Fondly, Annabellethecat/ Linda.

[Sweet Caroline 1]

Hi @gellen!  I just stopped by to check in with you.  My, there are a lot of people here that care about you and want you to feel better.  You really do have friends here.  This is a good start.  I have been taking an antidepresent since the 1980's.  I started taking it for severe panic attacks.  With the medication I can drive and live a normal life.  Medications really help.  There are several.  If one doesn't work, try another.  I got mine from my regular doctor.  I didn't go through some of the other avenues discussed here.  Take the big leap and call your doctor.  Feeling better is just a phone call away.  I care,  SC