What did you do... - Page 4

karuna · ‎08-31-2014

@ZhillsThinking of you and sending you strength.

karuna · ‎08-31-2014

((( Hug )))

Caring and sending you love and support.

Zhills · ‎11-15-2011

Saw the GI surgeon yesterday and the colonoscopy report was not back yet. However, I developed a "micro perforation" when I had diverticulitis and she did say that it has to be removed and "the surgery is the same" even if the thickening is cancer. Any treatment afterwards, depending on size and severity, will be differently. It will take about a month to set up surgery because it will require other physicians' presence also. That's all I know for now. Thanks again for your kind words. They do help.

MaggieMack · ‎10-01-2014

@Zhills, sending hugs and blessings your way.

I was 26 when the same thing happened to me, it was malignant melanoma, no family in the area. After biopsy, I had surgery. It is now FORTY years later. Don't you ever give up hope or the expectation of the best possible outcome!

No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted. - Aesop

Tinkrbl44 · ‎08-23-2010

@Zhills wrote:
Saw the GI surgeon yesterday and the colonoscopy report was not back yet. However, I developed a "micro perforation" when I had diverticulitis and she did say that it has to be removed and "the surgery is the same" even if the thickening is cancer. Any treatment afterwards, depending on size and severity, will be differently. It will take about a month to set up surgery because it will require other physicians' presence also. That's all I know for now. Thanks again for your kind words. They do help.

@Zhills

Sorry you're dealing with this, but the best thing you can do is to not get ahead of yourself. This might be quite serious ... and it might not.

If it is more involved, PLEASE keep in mind that there are different kinds of support, and you willmost likely need to get different things from various people.

While a family member might be invaluable with intellectual support ... medical explanations in plain English ... others may be more suited to offer emotional support. Please don't expect any one person to be able to give you everything you need.

Sending you hugs and good thoughts ... and hoping you take this one day at a time.

Tink

karuna · ‎08-31-2014

@Zhills

((( More waiting and going into surgery without a definitive answer is difficult. ))) Sheesh.

I was thinking most have an idea if they have a malignancy or not before surgery...and maybe you will too.

I was thinking of a quote by Dalai Lama... "There are only two days in the year that nothing can be done. One is called yesterday and the other is called tomorrow, so today is the right day to love, believe, do and mostly live."

I try to live by that. I learned so much watching others go through their treatments, as I was, and how they responded. It reinforced by conviction that no two people are alike and no two people have the same pain tolerance, life experience or support system as another does. But be all had this in common.

I'm not suggesting you worry but I'm saying any feelings you have are your feelings and the process you take. IF you find yourself feeling alone or stuck in the muck, post and we will toss you a life line.

Try to do something nice for yourself and treat yourself with some TLC.

I think now might be a time to reach out for support, not only here (and I'm certain we will be here) but support groups for those going through surgery, recovering etc. No one will turn you away. It's true no one person can give us everything we want or need---including and sometimes especially family members.

Can you find the energy to reach out to them now, asking for what you need from them or telling them you don't know what you need, but you know you need something and you are scared. Maybe a physical hug, understanding and no judgment.

The support groups can give you that. They get it.

One thing I thought about, other than my fear and monkey mind, was something we tried to tell our sons and I needed to remind/ask myself---remember when you couldn't do something---ride a bicycle, do that complicated math problem, figure out how to moon walk (OK that was me ;p) and now you can (I can't moon walk) ? The point is to remember how far you've come, grown and will continue too. Remember wanting support from those you know, isn't out of the ordinary. Also remember all your feelings are feelings others have felt and someone will understand and stand by you. Ask for what you need, even if that changes day to day.

(((And, you've touched many here and we care.)))

Zhills · ‎11-15-2011

Thank you so much for taking the time to type out all of your kind thoughts. God bless you, karuna, you are an angel!

Didn't get a phone call today so it's gonna be a tough weekend. I have decided not to tell anyone that it is possibly malignant. The GI surgeon seemed to think it was; just not sure yet!

I knew I needed surgery to remove the perforated colon but it was to be a simple surgery, couple of days in the hospital and all is OK! Yeah, I could handle that!

Thanks to you and the other poster here, I do feel better about the overall situation. Thanks to all of you again. I will post again when I have some news (or just get 'down'). Good night.

Zhills · ‎11-15-2011

My daughter, the Doc, called today and asked how things went at the Doctor's appt. I told her the report was not back (correct) and that we just started planning for the surgery. I think I am OK. I did start my anti-anxiety meds. I have waves of fear and choke back tears, but I am allright most of the time. Trying to stay busy to keep from thinking. Playing lots of Scrabble and Solitaire!

MarieIG · ‎03-10-2010

Hello @Zhills {{{hugs}}}. What did I do? I waited, I cried, I prayed, I talked, I tried not to think about it, I thought about it, I hoped for the best, I imagined the worst, I worked, I ran on the treadmill (a lot). The pain comes in waves: the waiting is hard.

I would suggest that you don't go alone to the medical appointment. You may not remember everything clearly and it does help to have someone there. There is a bit of a surreal aspect to the whole situation. In my case the biopsy was ordered by a surgeon, so the result went to the surgeon's office. I got a call on my cell from the surgeon's office that the doctor wanted me to come in ASAP and to bring a family member.

You mention that you have a daughter. I went through cancer with my parents as well. I did want to be with them. I would give your daughter a chance to be with you if she can.

Do the math.

Zhills · ‎11-15-2011

Thanks. I will think about that. Depends on the phone call I get....only because she is in the process of changing jobs and moving right now and has her hands full also. Your experience is my greatest fear right now. Thanks for sharing. I pray you are now cancer free, healthy and happy!

PS I have done all of those but cry. I am never alone (my SO hangs over me like a guard). Not happy with that.