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Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,402
Registered: ‎03-14-2010

Re: The holiday season brings sadness after divorce


@151949 wrote:

What a person who has been widowed or divorced (and I know from experience) needs to do now is NOT to go looking for a man but to go looking for yourself. Join some organizations where you will do things you enjoy. Maybe you love art or swimming or jogging - whatever. Get out there and do it, make friends there and enjoy yourself. Make yourself happy.I love to take pictures so after my husband died I bought a used camera and took a night class at the community college. I made friends in that class and we would travel on day trips to go find subjects for our photography for our class.It filled my time, and helped me to focus on something other than what I had lost. I found myself and it helped my recovery from the depths of mourning. Just be you - and eventually you will meet a guy who is interested in YOU. 

Also , IMO, men can tell a woman who is desparate to find a man a mile away - and they will play her and in the end - hurt her badly.I've seen it 100 times. Don't go there. You are a valuable person yourself, you don't need some loser to define you.


151949 gives very good advice!!!  I joined a hiking club, traveled abroad, and took art lessons!  Read her post over several times and spring into action for the new year!!!

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,939
Registered: ‎08-08-2013

Re: The holiday season brings sadness after divorce

@fortune  Hi:  I have been wondering how your health is going.  How did your appt. with the new Urologist on the 12th, turn out????   Good news I hope? 

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,557
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: The holiday season brings sadness after divorce

[ Edited ]

I divorced in 1999 after 18 years of marriage and his family still invites me, not him to the Family Thanksgiving dinner every year.  I still take my double decker fudge and sit with his sisters their husbands, their children and now their grandchildren every year.  We also do other things through out the year with me in attendance. 

My ex and I have absolutely nothing to do with each other even though we share a grown child and grandchild.  He is not happy with his families good feelings toward me but 18 years of love and friendship with them does not just die to divorce. 

Cannot wait to see them all Thursday since some do not live here in our town like some of the other siblings.

"Live frugally, but love extravagantly."
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Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,402
Registered: ‎03-14-2010

Re: The holiday season brings sadness after divorce

[ Edited ]

@jobran wrote:

@fortune  Hi:  I have been wondering how your health is going.  How did your appt. with the new Urologist on the 12th, turn out????   Good news I hope? 


I like my new doctor.  He's given me some new medication and I'm scheduled for more tests.  I feel better.  Thanks so much for asking!!!

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,122
Registered: ‎08-01-2015

Re: The holiday season brings sadness after divorce

Hugs to all the peoples who experience sadness with the holidays. Whether it be divorce, loss of a child, poverty, illness, loneliness, no family at all, pain (mental and physical) many folks feel isolated and depressed more during the holidays. For me I try to not compare myself with others who have more blessings then myself.  I have terminal illness and am wheelchair bound, lost my children thru death, am also  divorced, and live so rural I feel alone alot.......I feel every day is a gift and do what I can to feel gratitude that this may be my last holiday season. 

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Posts: 309
Registered: ‎03-20-2015

Re: The holiday season brings sadness after divorce

@wonderwoman01.  Just checking back to see if you are in the Community today.  Thinking of you and hope you made it through today ok.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,147
Registered: ‎02-05-2011

Re: The holiday season brings sadness after divorce

Your ideas sound good, but the holidays can bring on depression that keeps one paralyzed to even get out.  I have seen it with friends and respect their individual wishes during this time.  If they need to be alone, let them but tell them they are always welcome in your plans.  Depression is tricky and not easily solved with finding a man or joining a class, it takes time and good friends and maybe therapy to help them through.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,402
Registered: ‎03-14-2010

Re: The holiday season brings sadness after divorce


@Stormygirl123 wrote:

Hugs to all the peoples who experience sadness with the holidays. Whether it be divorce, loss of a child, poverty, illness, loneliness, no family at all, pain (mental and physical) many folks feel isolated and depressed more during the holidays. For me I try to not compare myself with others who have more blessings then myself.  I have terminal illness and am wheelchair bound, lost my children thru death, am also  divorced, and live so rural I feel alone alot.......I feel every day is a gift and do what I can to feel gratitude that this may be my last holiday season. 


As long as you're here and sharing your wisdom, you're not alone.  We are here for you and will be thinking about you.  Thank you for helping others this holiday season!!!  Hugs to you!  You are a wonderful, brave woman!!!

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,122
Registered: ‎08-01-2015

Re: The holiday season brings sadness after divorce

Aww thank you so much fortune....Hugs! dummy me I couldn't find this thread again and am so new to sharing posts I didn't know there was notification alerts to guide me LOL. I have read the forums for years but only recently wrote anything . I felt that maybe I could connect with people if I shared here. Thank you so much for your kind words of encouragement. I do not feel so alone now.xoxox

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,495
Registered: ‎05-03-2014

Re: The holiday season brings sadness after divorce

I'm sorry for the pain you're going through, wonderwoman01. Hope it gets better for you.

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