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Super Contributor
Posts: 297
Registered: ‎05-09-2010

Re: My nerves are so on edge

I too have those days off and on.  I can become weepy easily.  I truly am a people person and no amount of zooming or phone calling fills that need.   I miss seeing my children and grandchildren.  Stay safe.

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Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,329
Registered: ‎03-19-2016

Re: My nerves are so on edge

@goldensrbest   I'm sorry! I'm going through the same thing since losing Krypto in July. I've missed the daily things too numerous to mention, but like the bananas he loved or carrots. His cow, his toys. I've given a lot away and rearranged things. 
  I have Snickers but her personality is completely different. He trained her to help me due to my hearing. I've spent more time training her and walking her so she won't be depressed about loosing her friend. 
  Living alone and the pandemic is making everything more stressful it's affecting everything we do. 
  Even when I lost my parents and husband I didn't feel this daily sadness. I think it's because I can't escape it. There are no movies, lunch with friends, trips, even relatives can't be close. I miss my granddaughter! 
  So, I'm in the same house without everyone, not just Krypto, but I have Snickers at least to hug and pet.

  When my husband and Tom our Jack Russell passed Dec 22 and Dec 31 seventeen years ago this year I was really alone. I went on a cruise with a friend. When I returned home to the empty house I told my son I wanted another Jack Russell. 
  He took me to get Krypto (named after Superman's dog) and told me he was better than another husband. True! 
  Krypto trained himself to help me hear as my hearing worsened. He played ball and invented games, and was the best dog I've ever had. He understood me.

  He trained Snickers and as his back got worse and he slowed down we compensated. It was hard the last months. 
   Your Spirit was like my Krypto, getting you through life, depending on you and being there for you. 
   I'm glad they were a part of our lives, it's so hard without them. But we have to live each day one at a time and do things to make our routine different because they trained us!  
We did our best for them . Take care!

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Super Contributor
Posts: 297
Registered: ‎05-09-2010

Re: My nerves are so on edge

I too have those days off and on.  I can become weepy easily.  I truly am a people person and no amount of zooming or phone calling fills that need.   I miss seeing my children and grandchildren.  Stay safe.

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Honored Contributor
Posts: 11,566
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: My nerves are so on edge


@RetRN wrote:

Alcohol is never the answer.


I know ,honestly if i have one drink every few years,is all i want ,not a fan of alcohol.

When you lose some one you L~O~V~E, that Memory of them, becomes a TREASURE.
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Honored Contributor
Posts: 11,566
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: My nerves are so on edge


@Krypto wrote:

@goldensrbest   I'm sorry! I'm going through the same thing since losing Krypto in July. I've missed the daily things too numerous to mention, but like the bananas he loved or carrots. His cow, his toys. I've given a lot away and rearranged things. 
  I have Snickers but her personality is completely different. He trained her to help me due to my hearing. I've spent more time training her and walking her so she won't be depressed about loosing her friend. 
  Living alone and the pandemic is making everything more stressful it's affecting everything we do. 
  Even when I lost my parents and husband I didn't feel this daily sadness. I think it's because I can't escape it. There are no movies, lunch with friends, trips, even relatives can't be close. I miss my granddaughter! 
  So, I'm in the same house without everyone, not just Krypto, but I have Snickers at least to hug and pet.

  When my husband and Tom our Jack Russell passed Dec 22 and Dec 31 seventeen years ago this year I was really alone. I went on a cruise with a friend. When I returned home to the empty house I told my son I wanted another Jack Russell. 
  He took me to get Krypto (named after Superman's dog) and told me he was better than another husband. True! 
  Krypto trained himself to help me hear as my hearing worsened. He played ball and invented games, and was the best dog I've ever had. He understood me.

  He trained Snickers and as his back got worse and he slowed down we compensated. It was hard the last months. 
   Your Spirit was like my Krypto, getting you through life, depending on you and being there for you. 
   I'm glad they were a part of our lives, it's so hard without them. But we have to live each day one at a time and do things to make our routine different because they trained us!  
We did our best for them . Take care!


Yes, you get it, i am sorry for your loss of  krypto, great name, yes he was with me all the time, always wanting to kiss me,  so much love between him,and i.

When you lose some one you L~O~V~E, that Memory of them, becomes a TREASURE.
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Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,051
Registered: ‎05-02-2017

Re: My nerves are so on edge

 

 

I have had pets since I was a little girl, and every time I lose one it makes another hole in my heart.

 

Yet, I would never give up that pain or that sorrow, because it means that I loved them so very deeply and I will always be grateful that they were a part of my family and blessed me with their companionship.

 

Even though it may be hard to think about, there is always another waiting animal that needs a loving home.  No, you are not replacing a beloved pet, but simply expanding that circle of love.

 

I have made folders for each of my babies and I fill them with photos, information, poems and sketches.  They are all a part of my history and their memory will live forever.

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Honored Contributor
Posts: 11,017
Registered: ‎07-09-2011

Re: My nerves are so on edge

[ Edited ]

@goldensrbest 

 

I am sorry you are struggling so.  The loss of a fur-baby takes with it a piece of our hearts; please be gentle with your expectations of yourself while you find your balance again.

 

sending you {{{hugs}}}

 

"Animals are not my whole world, but they have made my world whole" ~ Roger Caras
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Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,652
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: My nerves are so on edge

@goldensrbest , I totally get what you mean.  When I lost my last Lab, I was truly thrown for a loop.  I missed that dog more than some people I know who have passed.  I cried my eyes out every time someone mentioned her. I am sure people thought I was crazy.

 

I loved what the poster said about the stages of loss and how they go from one to another until one day the dog's memory makes you smile.  It is so true.  You will smile again about Spirit's memories @goldensrbest  but it will take awhile.  Add to it all this COVID nonsense and it is just that much worse.

 

It is ok to grieve your loss.  Sending you a special hug.  LM🐾

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Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,788
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: My nerves are so on edge

@goldensrbest 

 

Normally we chat over in Pet Lovers, but I saw your message here and had a quick thought.  When grieving one of my most special pets, I picked up a book by Jon Katz called Going Home, Finding Peace When Pets Die. 

Although it says "pets" in the title, it is mostly geared to dogs and I thought it might help you. There are many pet grief books out there, but Katz is a dog person and it may help.

 

if you haven't done so yet, I suggest you to write a letter to Spirit going over all the special things you shared and how this changed your life for the better...and write in detail. This has helped me over the years with my pets.

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Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,838
Registered: ‎07-01-2012

Re: My nerves are so on edge

[ Edited ]

The absence you feel runs deep. It is an emptiness within your being.  You so miss the sense of touch and feel.

 

What I have to share is that I have I too have lost pets, and the last one, who was my heartbreaker because he was the last.

 

There was a time I had four large dogs and five cats all at once. Some from shelters and some found just all alone injured/hungry/ and scared, on the side of a road. On my fireplace mantle I have eleven boxes of ashes from these beloved animals.

 

When I had to say goodbye to my last one after almost 15 years having him by my side it was the heartbreaker.

 

I was lost and alone and so lonely. My family all were gone. There was/is no one. Crying, feeling sorry for myself and actually not knowing what to do even on my better days.

 

I started looking out my windows more. Even doing that made me cry because the ground had shadows for me. However I would look outside and began examining what I saw. I began adopting trees, birds and anything that was there. I began looking for changes in these things but I always missed that sense of feel.

 

This may all sound stupid but it is my experience. One day I saw on TV plush children toy animals. I looked and saw them and wishing I had my real companion back. To make a long and somewhat silly experience short, I purchased for myself a stuffed animal!! 

 

Later when it arrived, my first thought was what sane adult does this. When I opened the package and took the animal out and I tossed it to the side. I was disgusted with myself and left it there.

 

Then about a week or so later I walked by and looked at it. It looked so sad. Well I picked it up and just stared at it. Then I sat down on my couch and just held it. I still have it, and I still hold it.

 

No, it is not a replacement for my lost friend, but it is something that is mine I can hold, touch and feel, and love something like a kids teddy bear.

 

My plush animal is not small, it is as big as my black lab was. It stands on it's own and I take good care of him.

 

I still look out my window a lot but have my friend inside too. Yes, admittedly I talk to him and when I do it might mean I am crazy but I have his touch.

 

This really is my experience. I was most reluctant in sharing it with you because that meant that others would read it and frankly I doubt many would understand what I am sharing. You might not understand.

 

Loneliness and emptiness is a sorrow inside oneself that is felt so deeply. Touching something that may help a person smile is worth it.

Looking out a window you may see things that surprise you.

Reading this may even make you think better of yourself, that you are not loosing your mind but Chiclets may have lost hers.