Wellness

[Drythe]

@newjersey

Sorry for your grief, it does hurt so much.

Please call your physician tomorrow, and get in right away to talk with her/him.  

H/she can point you in the right direction, so you can talk with a professional.  No shame at all in getting help.

[RedTop]

More than 10 years ago, a close friend from work lost her only child.   She did not cope well at all, and retreated to her bed for weeks.   Several of us had to go to her house, physically pull her out of bed, shove her in the shower, and then force her to go outside and move around in the air and sunshine.

I never thought my friend would be able to return to work, but once she agreed to see her doctor and start taking medication, we were able to get her out of the house more, and functioning again.   She agreed to therapy, and also found Grief Share, which is what really helped her move forward.

@newjersey, I send sympathy and best wishes to you for better days ahead.   Please take the steps needed to help yourself.   

[Catty2]

I agree about getting professional help.  They can assess the situation and decide what may work for you, maybe meds and counseling.  Sending you best wishes.  

[panda1234]

I suffered with grief for years, cried on a daily basis. Started with a low dose of an antidepressant and life is better.It just takes the edge off.

[KathyM23]

Grief after a loss is normal, but if you are spirling down into anxiety and depression, please get some professional help before you get down too far.   See a psychologist and get started right away.  My DH had to do so after a loss; he got so far down I was so worried for him.  I am not a fan of medication, but you may need some short-term help with meds.   Grief is so hard to live with and I wish you some peace.  A grief support group can be a hugh help, having people who really understand how you feel.  Taling with friends can help, but the support of a group experiencing the same feelings as yours, I believe is more helpful.

Please check back with us, we do care.  I will put you in my prayers.

[Pook]

@newjersey  So sorry to hear this.  Everyone goes through grief differently.  Like others stated, please get some help by going for counseling.  Handling it on your own usually is what most try to do.  Counseling helped me immensely.   One huge thing that helped me  was writing my thoughts and feelings throughout the day.   Don't suppress or try to ignore you feelings.   You recently posted about your beloved cat.  When having to put down my soulmate dog, my wonderful vet suggested writing an obit and documentary of his life.  He suggested that each day I write about my feelings and include one happy time  with him.  It was amazing to find that over time there was less about the sadness and more about the happy times.  It's never easy.     

[ID2]

Sorry you are experiencing grief. Sorry, but I would steer away from taking drugs to relieve your sadness. I find that getting out of the house and doing something as simple as taking a walk really will clear your head. Start walking for exercise and you will be surprised how much better you'll feel and its good for you! Walk around the block, go to your local park and take a stroll. It's fun to people watch and get your mind off what's troubling you. Trust me, it will help!

[Imaoldhippie]

Meds will help with the anxiety and depression but not with grief.  I do think meds will help you handle the grief better.  Go to your doctor and explain.  I am sure he/she will be willing to help.

[VaBelle35]

I'm not sure if you are employed, but many employers have an Employee Assistance Program that has a counseling component available to immediate family members (not just the employee).

The counseling is free up to a certain number and then they can get you to someone in your medical plan.

While a regular physician is a good first step, a Grief Counselor is probably best, one who can work with your physician.

While "anti-depressants" may not help you with your grief, there are things available to help you sleep (both prescription and over the counter), if you are having trouble sleeping.  You might try melatonin.  I use Andrew Lessman's Night Time, which is a mixture of melatonin, velarian root and magnesium.

If you are anxious during the day, there are things you can take as well to help you through that.

But getting into someone who understands grief and can put a full program together for you will help you if your grief is impacting your quality of life.

I would also add that there is no timeline on grief.  Everyone grieves in their own way, in their own time.  Do not let anyone tell you otherwise.

[Another new name Sue]

Today is Friday. Make some calls about counseling and your doctor to ask about meds TODAY.  Then you will have peace of mind over the weekend that you are moving forward.  

Counseling can help. A friend is in counseling now after a sudden loss. As for the meds, opinions here don’t matter, it’s your personal decision and worth discussing with your physician. In case you decide to try them, be sure to ask how to stop taking them, all at once or taper off, in case you decide you do not like them. 

Sending you a hug. Deepest condolences, and may your pain lessen in time.