Reply
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,258
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Feeling depressed & helpless after surgery


@151949 wrote:

@Reba055 wrote:

The pain meds could be causing depression too. That was the case with my relative. They may need to change it. 

 

@151949  Dang, you're tough. Glad you aren't my nurse,  lol. 

Just ribbing you, don't take it too seriously. 

 

Best advise has been given. Call your doctor. Hope you feel better soon. 


 

 

Seriously??? People who have actual major surgeries like wipples or AAA or open heart are up and out of bed in a chair by the next morning. Open heart patients are usually sitting in a chair already by the time the morning shift arrives the next day. As soon as all the tubes etc were out so they had the room to walk we walked them around their little cubicle in the ICU then into a chair for at least an hour or so. These are patients who have had the biggest surgeries there are. A lap appy - when the appendix has not burst is about one of the simplest surgeries there is. There is no reason this patient should not be able to be up and walking around unassisted.And actually will feel much better if they are up and around. Clearly the doctors think so too - or they would not send you home.


@151949

 

ICU patients have no choice in much of anything.  They do what they're told, regardless of how they're really felling.  ICU is a "technical" world.

 

***

 

I'm going to try to drive my point home one last time.  On my Dad's side of the family, which includes my Dad, Aunt, Grandmother, Great Aunts and some of my cousins, they must have inherited a gene which provides for a low threshold of pain.  Every little ouchie becomes a major pain and has a life interruptive factor of 10.  Interestingly, many of these relatives have also suffered from clinical depression.  A study needs to be done, which would address this clinical conundrum.

 

***

 

I'm starting year 32 of chronic migraine.  Every single day I have migraine pain. Some days it's better than others, some days the pain is a 4, but some days that da*n pain skyrockets to a 7 or 8.  If I had inherited that gene mentioned above, I wouldn't be here.  Understand?  Until you know someone with low tolerance to pain or have it yourself, you simply cannot understand what the big deal is.  Add to this depression, and you've got a patient who needs HELP.

 

***

 

I'm surprised that continuing ed courses don't address patients with unexpected reactions to the post-op experience.

 

 

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,290
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Feeling depressed & helpless after surgery

I get very upset with people who think one size fits all.  Every patient is different, every reaction to surgeries is different.  Your comments to the poster about stopping generalizations was excellent,  I couldn't have said it better.

 

I had hip surgery February 7th of this year and am still in a lot of pain.  The recovery has been long and painful.  Someone else having the exact same surgery might be out dancing, one cannot be compared to the other.  Again, your post was excellent and I hope the person it was directed at learned something.

The moving finger writes; And having writ, Moves on: nor all your Piety nor Wit Shall lure it back to cancel half a Line Nor all your Tears Wash out a Word of it. Omar Khayam
Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,409
Registered: ‎03-21-2010

Re: Feeling depressed & helpless after surgery

Hope you are okay.

 

You haven't responded back.    It is hard to have surgery and any kind of physical trauma (broken bone, etc.).

 

You will get better and things will improve.

 

Hope you are doing better.   

 

Take care.

Super Contributor
Posts: 480
Registered: ‎05-16-2010

Re: Feeling depressed & helpless after surgery

Smiley Embarassed Thank you all SOOO MUCH for replying. I'm a little overwhelmed. I wasn't expecting so many replies, and kind words. You helped me in ways I wasn't expecting. The whole scene happened so quickly I had no time to research, or get nervous. I was chatting up the OR folks like they were old friends, which is something I never do because my panic disorder holds me back from social contact. 

 

After I got home the depression sunk in when I realized I had no clue how to do anything. Luckily I had a Florence Nightingale to help me physically. Not knowing anyone who had had an appendectomy I came here. I'm so glad I did. 

 

Now nearly a week later, the outside wounds are about healed, I'm still tender, have boughts of exhaustion and shooting pains in my pelvis, no appetite, and I'm stiff---this rain isn't helping with my arthritis, but for the most part I'm fine. Like I said, it happened so fast I feel like I went to sleep, and woke up beaten. 

 

Thank you so much. It really means a lot to me. Hopefully your words will help others too. ((HUGS))

 

 

Super Contributor
Posts: 480
Registered: ‎05-16-2010

Re: Feeling depressed & helpless after surgery

[ Edited ]

 

@151949

 

Well, I wasn't told any breathing exercises. I have been walking around. In fact, I was walking around a 3 am the following day, surgery was at 4 pm.

 

Walking wasnt the issue, albeit tight and slow, getting up, whether from sitting or worse from laying in bed, WAS the issue. It was just me. I was told to use a pillow, but wasn't instructed on how to use it, or which muscles to use--no abs at all, only legs, arms to pull up, etc. I had to figure it out on my own. 

 

In the hospital they allowed me to use a wheelchair as a walker for balance checks. I didn't lay on it, just as assistance. A home I used my cane---I get aura migraines and use it to help feel my way around when my vision goes out--agian for balance checks. 

 

I wasn't on a computer, my phone can go online. 

 

I wasn't whining. I know there are far worse off than I. I have no friends here due to panic disorder (I was abused as a kid and will forever blame myself for it. An abused dog will forever be leary.) , I have days I can't leave the house. It causes me to be depressed. I apologize if that sounds like a lame excuse. I've learned that those blessed enough to never have PD, GAD, or SAD, will never know how hard it is. I have one family member here. When they were  / are busy I here alone,  to let the voices and worry to take over. I know I need help. I've been called crazy, and needing asylum my whole life by doctors. I've given up. 

 

This was more of a rant out of shear stress and exhaustion. I have never had this feeling of physical helpless. I just was curious if it was normal to feel stupidly depressed over it. I apologize for making it seem like I was whining. I can assure you I have been up and not babying myself in bed. I've learned to breath through the pain when standing, and only take 15 ml, of the 10-20 ml suggested dose to be used only as needed, of the hydrocodone / acetaminophen liquid at night before bed. The discomfort of standing lasts a moment, no need to stay groggy all day. The ER RN was fine with me doing that.

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,580
Registered: ‎06-15-2015

Re: Feeling depressed & helpless after surgery

[ Edited ]

Ane1 There:

 

 

I am happy to hear you are doing better. Your words alone tell me you are now optimistic about getting past this unexpected situation, and you will be just fine.

 

My guess is your "chatting in the OR" had a lot to do with the anesthesia and/or the pain killers they had given you. Some people become someone else before and after surgeries because of pain killers or anesthesia. Me? I talk a lot either way and none of that stuff seems to effect me.

 

A little story about 1 of my ER visits and things happening quickly. It was on Memorial Day 2008. My wife dropped me off at the Emergency Room and she and her mother proceeded on to place flowers on some graves. I was feeling pretty weak so thought I'd best get checked out since I had previously had 2 heart attacks, 1 in 2003 and 1 in 2007.

 

Little did I even think, much less know, I would spend 1 day short of a month in 2 different hospitals before I would see our home or my furry kids again. I won't go into the long story of that long hospital stay. Just letting you know some bad/unplanned things can and do happen very quickly, and all we can do is try our best to deal with them.

 

As I mentioned in my other post what has always helped "me deal"?  Is optimism at all times and lots and lots of Patience!!  My Best to you,

 

 

hckynut(john)

 

 

 

 

hckynut(john)
Valued Contributor
Posts: 874
Registered: ‎07-05-2010

Re: Feeling depressed & helpless after surgery

Alright, another nurse chiming in here...it doesn't matter how 'mild' the surgery may be, or what procedure has been done; what matters is how well the patient can manage on their own.  Any invasive surgery can cause major complications that could be deadly serious, whether it is antibacterial ointment for a paper cut to prevent flesh eating disase, open-heart surgery, or an abdominal lap.  Belittling someone when they are reaching out for advice & help is not productive, it is cruel.  

SerenityNow!
"Be as a bird perched on a frail branch that she feels bending beneath her; still she sings away all the same, knowing she has wings." ~Victor Hugo
Valued Contributor
Posts: 874
Registered: ‎07-05-2010

Re: Feeling depressed & helpless after surgery

@Ane1There, I have social anxiety, so I understand the type of situation you deal with, & the challenges.  You were probably chatting up a storm @ the hospital, due to the meds you were on giving you a euphoria & if it was Versed, probably had you being a really chatty-Cathy.  They affect most people that way, it isn't a choice.  

 

Due to the neuro issues you deal with, you may find challenges during your recovery, as your body recovers.  They put a toxic soup into our bodies during those types of procedures, and your brain chemicals will be affected.  When your inner dialogue won't shut-up & leave you in peace, I find that getting a book out & reading to keep those written words in your mind instead of that pesky inner dialogue always having you as a captive listener, works well sometimes.  

 

Glad you are recuperating, and most of us did not get the impression you were whining at all.  No apologies necessary.  

SerenityNow!
"Be as a bird perched on a frail branch that she feels bending beneath her; still she sings away all the same, knowing she has wings." ~Victor Hugo