My Dear mistri,
I am so glad you posted, and I had personally paged you when I came back home, but you did not reply, but I am so relieved that you replied now dear friend!
I also look forward to your reply after you read this post.
I contacted QVC since Ravgirl's original grief thread was on the Community bb's, just not accepting new comments, and I felt very strongly that it was an invaluable aid to everyone who at one time or another, may lose someone they deeply loved and cared for, so I sent QVC a message and they email replied to me.
They stated that they read each and every post and emailed me that they also agreed that the thread should remain open, but after 1 year again the comments would no longer display, and at that time if there was activity on the thread I could just email again and request they reopen to accept comments again....so that is how I was instrumental in requesting QVC completely reopen the Delayed Grief thread.
I do hope this reopening of this very important thread helps many people as it helped myself and others.
I also pray Ravgirl is well since she stopped communicating shortly after she started her delayed grief thread. If she is well and reading this I pray she will come back to us on the same thread, or any other thread just to advise she is well and safe. She is also always in my constant daily prayers, as many others are, and will always be.
mistri I know the agony you are experiencing.
I have also walked these grief journeys until I found myself being an orphaned sole survivor of my entire immediate family, and relatives.
mistri it is never easy when we lose those we love so dearly.
Accepting the inevitable after the shock and denial have run their course is extremely difficult, but this is something we all do eventually comes to terms with.
The pain and loss will always remain within our spirits as mortals, because we have been given the gift to comprehend, experience love, sorrow, pain and other emotions, knowing our time on earth is but a fleeting nano second in the real scheme of things.
The 5 steps of grief I posted in the very beginning of this thread really cover most of the basics as you already know mistri.
August is the 3rd anniversary of losing my beloved Husband and Mother 2 weeks apart as you already know. Those were the last 2 losses, and their dual deaths so close together with no closure offered or any goodbyes until we meet again said....... I believe are the most painful losses of all.
Losing your dear father of course has been a shock so expect the first year to be shaky and your emotions completely out of whack.
mistri this is the time to seek medical intervention if you are experiencing any of the following symptoms:
Extreme sadness, inability to rest and sleep, having re-occurring nightmares, seeking complete isolation from others, do not feel life is worth living anymore, feel confusion, loss of interest in showering and daily care, loss of appetite and no desire to drink or eat, loss of coping mechanisms, experiencing a non stop tsunami of sobs and tears which steal your breath away, and wracks pain throughout your body,leaving you feel constant fatigue and listlessness.Lost all will to survive, having suicidal thoughts, etc.
Many also feel extreme confusion, anger, denial, ill health, and the inability to understand and accept the death, and move on.
Perhaps if you have not yet considered grief counseling therapy, now would be the time?
I believe in my heart that the hardest loss to accept is the loss of our parents, who are the first faces we see after being born. They are the ones who will always love us unconditionally, and the ones we treasure and always seek for love, support, wisdom, religious beliefs, and guidance.
Unfortunately no one ever promised us a forever after on earth.......but if we hold religious beliefs through Jesus Christ we are promised reunion with our loved ones in Heaven, and a Heavenly everlasting after life.
Since no one really knows the outcome of where our souls go w when they depart from our earthly vessels, I feel accepting Christ into our lives if our parents are Christians will sustain us.
They say everyone needs some sort of belief system in order to survive on earth. Christ and believing in him is the way to reunion with loved ones and eternal life as that is promised in the Holy Bible.
For you this may not be the answer, but search your heart mistri as I know the answer lies within.
Remember mistri "where there is life there is hope, and hope is as eternal as the word forever.”
I know your feelings about religion mistri, as we have already discussed them, but no matter what a person believes in, or does not believe in, I believe it is vitally important for everyone to seek a grief counselor as they take their grief journey. Many Churches provide them free of charge as do Hospitals so please seek them out and take Mom with you if you feel she too can use the therapy support.
From your reply to me below mistri I believe now would be the time to also contact your physician, and go to see that person so they may help you and prescribe much needed meds to enable you to cope in an easier fashion.
Please make these choices mistri as they will help you move forward, as I know that is what your Dear Father would want for you......as I do, and as I am sure your Mom does too.
Please reply when you read this and also reply whenever you feel need.
As long as I am state side and not traveling abroad with my new husband I will reply......and I hope if I am not here someone else will reply to you and others.
When I return again I will reply to all the threads I missed....I promise mistri.
BTW big sister our friend said she checks the bb's frequently so in my absence I know she will reply as she did say she would.
mistri my prayer for you and your Dear Mom today is this.....
I pray God holds you both in the warm loving palms of his protective hands and guides your footsteps. I also pray he sprinkles you both with understanding, acceptance, inner peace of mind and spirit, and gives you both reasons to know life is precious and we must all accept whatever he has in store for us.....because the truth is only God knows the answers.
On 8/11/2014 mistriTsquirrel said:
Hi adore!
I just stopped back in today, and was surprised to see this thread re-opened.
I am really struggling with my father's death; it has been about 3 1/2 months since he died.
I don't know how to pick myself up from this. The idea that I will never see him again is like a knife in my heart every single day.
--mistri
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