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Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,057
Registered: ‎05-24-2010

Re: Valerie Bertinelli and the trolls........


@stevieb wrote:

@agb80  I agree with your point of view, popular or not. Two points I'd make are first, it's fascinating to me what (and for whom...) people choose to be just oh so sensitive about and what they don't... Second, and probably more relevant in this case, is that when one is a media person who's consistently putting it out there, then there's going to be blow-back and there are going to be comments. Like it or not, it goes along with putting oneself in the public eye.


@steviebI do agree there is another side to fame. However, body shaming is not OK. It doesn't matter if you are a celebrity, or just a normal everyday person. There is no reason to criticize someone's weight, or any other body shaming comment. It is cruel, and unnecessary.

 

As for Valerie's reaction keep in mind she was a child star. She never had the chance to go through her adolescent years in the "normal" sense. This is imperative for emotional growth. Hence her emotional reaction to these comments. Be kind everyone you don't know the other persons story unless you "walk a mile in their shoes"!

Honored Contributor
Posts: 9,739
Registered: ‎05-19-2012

Re: Valerie Bertinelli and the trolls........

The tiniest and most morally weak souls are so bold when they can communicate anonymously.   

 

 

 

 

Valued Contributor
Posts: 923
Registered: ‎01-27-2020

Re: Valerie Bertinelli and the trolls........

For those who believe the old adage about sticks and stones, that's not true for many.  Words certainly can and do hurt.  Valerie is probably a sensitive person and it got to her.  

 

Since Valerie's ex-husband, whom she remained great friends with and was the father of her child died not long ago, she might have started over-eating out of depression.  Who knows and it shouldn't concern anyone.  Maybe she is just tired of trying to maintain, what might be for her, an unrealistic weight. 

 

I read that she was on her own social media page looking up some of her older recipes when she came across these lovely comments.  I think Valerie is so pretty and once women get a ittle older we do need a bit more weight on us, IMO.  Women can be so nasty to other women.

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,057
Registered: ‎05-24-2010

Re: Valerie Bertinelli and the trolls........


@mom2four0418 wrote:

@ThinkingOutLoud wrote:

@agb80 wrote:

@ThinkingOutLoud wrote:

Some posts here have me shaking my head. Have some of you never heard of 'love thy neighbor', the golden rule or 'what goes around comes around'? Such lack of compassion says a lot. 

 

"If you want to reap kindness, sow kindness."

"If you want a better world, be better."


@ThinkingOutLoud I wasn't conversing with her on social media I hope you realize.  i don't even use it.  I just saw this thread and posted my opinion based on her video cryi and loosing it and then realized she didn't lose a loved one but some person she doesn't know called her fat.  Frankly I have no idea what she looks like these days nor do I care.    


Missed the point entirely. The critcism is the issue, not whether you follow her or know what she looks like these days. What you put into the world matters!



And it doesn't matter whether someone is an actor, reality star, famous person, or someone you love. It makes no difference if they cook, how big or small they are, menopause, pandemic, or anything else. I will never understand the mindset of any person who makes negative comments, observations, or jokes about anyone's appearance or mental state. I read it on these forums on a regular basis. Please, think before you speak.


Amen @mom2four0418 great post!

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,057
Registered: ‎05-24-2010

Re: Valerie Bertinelli and the trolls........


@Pearlee wrote:

I'm laughing at people writing nastiness in their posts condemning @agb80  for being nasty in her post.  More "do as I say, not as I do" behavior. 


@PearleePoster's are not attacking @agb80 they are reacting to her insensitive ignorant post. There is a difference.

Valued Contributor
Posts: 923
Registered: ‎01-27-2020

Re: Valerie Bertinelli and the trolls........

@ Carmie - That is a beautiful post and so true.Heart

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,057
Registered: ‎05-24-2010

Re: Valerie Bertinelli and the trolls........

I just watched the video, and you can see the pain she is feeling. These issues go deep, and my heart goes out to her. I think she is brave and this video will help other people.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,576
Registered: ‎06-13-2011

Re: Valerie Bertinelli and the trolls........

I haven't watched this video but if I were VB I would just consider the source of these mean spirited remarks.   She's a successful actress with probably more in life than most of those trolls. Someone here mentioned that they thought the remarks were more than likely from younger people.  I would agree with that.  It seems the trend among young women is that we should all be a size 2.  What a ridiculous concept!

 

I think Valerie looks great and there's no way that I would call her overweight.   She's over sixty years of age and looks exactly the way she should.  I'm sure she spent years trying to keep thin by starving herself.  She's in an industry that is particularly difficult for women.     

 

Someone mentioned Candice Bergen and how she has learned to deal with her body as she aged.  I remember reading an article in which she said she refuses to worry about a little weight gain. She said she enjoys food and she going to spend her remaining years being happy.

 

In one way, I agree that by VB making that video she gave the trolls exactly what they wanted.  They upset her and got the results they had hoped for.  

 

I don't go to Instagram but I've heard from others that it is a jungle.  People can be especially cruel to each other there.  

 

Unfortunately when you put yourself out there you have to deal with all of the remarks, both good and bad.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 37,847
Registered: ‎06-11-2011

Re: Valerie Bertinelli and the trolls........


@manny2 wrote:

@Pearlee wrote:

I'm laughing at people writing nastiness in their posts condemning @agb80  for being nasty in her post.  More "do as I say, not as I do" behavior. 


@PearleePoster's are not attacking @agb80 they are reacting to her insensitive ignorant post. There is a difference.


@manny2. You are mincing words. The posters criticizing her are being equally mean as their accusations of her being mean.  I don't want to go back and forth with you on this. That is my position.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 18,612
Registered: ‎10-25-2010

Re: Valerie Bertinelli and the trolls........


@Pearlee wrote:

@manny2 wrote:

@Pearlee wrote:

I'm laughing at people writing nastiness in their posts condemning @agb80  for being nasty in her post.  More "do as I say, not as I do" behavior. 


@PearleePoster's are not attacking @agb80 they are reacting to her insensitive ignorant post. There is a difference.


@manny2. You are mincing words. The posters criticizing her are being equally mean as their accusations of her being mean.  I don't want to go back and forth with you on this. That is my position.


When I see anyone being mean or hurtful to others, I speak up. They deserve to be called out.  They should be ashamed.

 

Then along come some people like yourself who call out the people who are trying to stop the hurtful comments by protecting the offender.  Maybe you think we should all just mind our own business and let everyone say what they want...even it it is hurtful.

 

It is not mean to call out a person who is being rude, offensive or aggressively nasty to others. We have certain expectations of people who live in a civilized society. Going rogue with comments that are intentionally hurtful will get you called out.

 

I think a certain poster knows this and is baiting us to get a reaction.