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[silkyk]

You can find help here in scary situations like this. Elder abuse is so wrong. Don't wait till it's too late.https://www.helpguide.org/articles/abuse/elder-abuse-and-neglect.htm

[2blonde]

@BarbiHollywood  Oh my.  I don't believe your stepmother has your dad's best interests in mind.  Since you can't go there, it's possible she may be withholding medication from him.  If he wants to see you and she won't allow it, that's elder abuse IMO.  I also think you need to at least contact an attorney to see what your and your dad's rights are.  I wish you luck.

[Venezia]

@BarbiHollywood- Another thought is that you don't know what she's telling your father about your absence.  Very worrying.

[BarbiHollywood]

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@2blonde wrote:

@BarbiHollywood  Oh my.  I don't believe your stepmother has your dad's best interests in mind.  Since you can't go there, it's possible she may be withholding medication from him.  If he wants to see you and she won't allow it, that's elder abuse IMO.  I also think you need to at least contact an attorney to see what your and your dad's rights are.  I wish you luck.

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Thank you, everyone, for all your thoughts and advice, it is all appreciated.

I didn't really share too much in my email, but this woman is a kook.  Twenty years of me biting my tongue and being respectful to her for my Dad's sake and this is the thanks I get.   I should have been rude  snappy to her like she's been to me.  

Yes, my Dad has a will and is of sound mind, thankfully.  I have already been to see a friend of mine who is an attorney who suggested strongly, too, that I have a consultation with someone who specializes in this area (not her area).  Because of the helpful, understanding staff in the doc's office, I know that at least as of his last appointment late-July that I have Power of Attorney and was on his HIPAA.  My husband and I have witnessed Wifey physically shove my Dad which made me blow my top and I got all over her like a bad rash.  She just shrugged, got up and walked away.  My Dad said that was not the first time that had happened.  I contacted the doc's office to report this (I'm telling EVERYONE we come in contact with to document things) and even reported this physical abuse to the risk assessment department at the doc's office.  Meantime, I know I should be contacting the police but that would only escalate things, and with me removed from the picture, I can only imagine how she'd harm him once the police left.  I know that I can request a "well check" by the police, but, again, she'd take it out on him for sure.  What makes things so horrible is that my Dad is a wonderful, kind man who would rather take her wrath and protect me by saying everything is okay, don't worry.  I worry!!!  I appreciate all the kind words and appreciate this "therapy session."  Have a great day, all of you.  :-)

[BirkiLady]

@BarbiHollywoodWhat about Social Services? Don't they check on abusive situations, rather than the Police? Perhaps that wouldn't seem so frightening to your dad's wife, but it would be documented and your dad might be able to speak in confidential terms with a social worker.

ETA: I'm surprised your dad's Physician's office hasn't suggested something more. Always thought a physican was required to notify the appropriate authorities if they suspected  abuse or abdormal behaviors. 

[AuntG]

The evil stepmother again. Think twice before marrying a second time.

[cowboy sam]

@Venezia@BarbiHollywood

I agree..

agree also that

this sounds like elder abuse and should be reported....please do everything in your power that you can help your dad.

sending you

((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))and prayers and keep us updated please ...as we do care.

[kivah]

@BarbiHollywood

The same scenario just happened with Glen Campbell's, I believe, 4th wife. 

[VaBelle35]

People should have taken a page out of the Frank Sinatra book.

As expected, the document, made public Thursday, divvies up most of Sinatra's considerable estate between wife No. 4, Barbara Marx, and his three kids, Frank Jr., Nancy and Tina.

The kicker? Obviously aware of the considerable tension between his kids (all from his first marriage to Nancy Barbato) and his wife (for many years they reportedly refused to be in the same room together), the Chairman included a clause in his will that automatically disinherits anyone who contests it. That means the heirs will have to make nice if they want to collect.

[drizzellla]

Barbi

Please see a elder Lawyer. Yes, your Father has a will BUT are you the Executor? My parents will was in their safety deposit box. I was Power of Attorney. BUT Power of Attorney ends at death. My parents died within 5 days of one another and I was unable to get into their safety deposit box in order to probate the will for over a year. Finally I refused to pay for the rental on the box and wrote to the President of the bank.

Also, you do not know what crazy thing your step mother might come up with. You need to protect your Dad. And have it in writing.

  
Your stepmother may be a kook but she may also be clever as a fox too. Please talk to a lawyer.