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Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,180
Registered: ‎03-19-2010

Re: Ben Affleck Back in Rehab/Jennifer Intervention

He'd be a tough guy to love.  It looks like she's the only ex that cared enough to show up and help him.

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Posts: 23,835
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Ben Affleck Back in Rehab/Jennifer Intervention


@Phantom41 wrote:

He'd be a tough guy to love.  It looks like she's the only ex that cared enough to show up and help him.


Yes....other people have lives of their own to deal with....not just his.....it gets very old after a while.

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Posts: 6,210
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Ben Affleck Back in Rehab/Jennifer Intervention


@chrystaltree wrote:

God, that woman loves that man!   And he's incredibly lucky to have her.  I read recently that while she filed for divorce a while  ago, neither has done anything to move the divorce foward and the judge threatened to throw the case out...for second time.  I remember thinking that she's doing that for Ben.  She knows that as his wife, she has a certain amout of control and influence over him.  And then he fell off the wagon.  And there she was to take care of him and manage the situation.  That's the nature of addiction.  A 22 year old floozy and a box of booze.  Ben was in trouble and Jennifer was right there for him.  


Who knows if it's out of love for him or love for her kids.  I am sure the thought of him having any kind of visitation with them when he is in that state is not something she would desire.  Very sad situation and he is very lucky to have her.   You look at them and how hard she works to keep a relationship, a good family relationship, how her kids are what she thinks of, vs. the Jolie/Pitt divorce and how she works overtime to try to put a wedge between their kids and Pitt.  She is a great example of putting the kids first in a divorce.  JMO of course.  :-)

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Posts: 14,354
Registered: ‎03-16-2010

Re: Ben Affleck Back in Rehab/Jennifer Intervention

Jennifer is a good woman to want to help her estranged husband, there are some who wouldn't lift a finger to help, I hope he knows how lucky he is. I had just read he broke up with his girlfriend of a year, I wonder if his drinking was a cause of the break up? I hope Ben gets the help he needs, for his sake and his childrens'.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,404
Registered: ‎03-11-2010

Re: Ben Affleck Back in Rehab/Jennifer Intervention

Jennifer Garner sounds like a solid gal.  After all he is the father of their three children. He also has the ability to have a great career as a director as well as an actor.  He needs to get his demons under control.

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Posts: 449
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Ben Affleck Back in Rehab/Jennifer Intervention

 

I get that Jennifer wants to help him because he is the father of her children BUT she is enabling him and until she stops doing that he may never get rid of his demons.  She's treating him like one of their kids.

 

She needs to step way back and let him see bottom.  Only then will he hopefully see that he really needs to shape up.

 

AA states that until someone reaches the bottom will they then understand that they need help.

 

There is NOTHING she - or anyone - can do that will fix him....he has to WANT to fix himself.

 

 

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Posts: 23,835
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Ben Affleck Back in Rehab/Jennifer Intervention


@chi5925 wrote:

 

I get that Jennifer wants to help him because he is the father of her children BUT she is enabling him and until she stops doing that he may never get rid of his demons.  She's treating him like one of their kids.

 

She needs to step way back and let him see bottom.  Only then will he hopefully see that he really needs to shape up.

 

AA states that until someone reaches the bottom will they then understand that they need help.

 

There is NOTHING she - or anyone - can do that will fix him....he has to WANT to fix himself.

 

 


@chi5925    You are so right!  Jennifer is an enabler...many who love those deep in addiction are enablers.  You are right that she should step back this time...she knows she can not fix him... but she is part of his illness....  so she comes to rescue him...again and again.  She needs therapy as much as he does.

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Posts: 6,162
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Ben Affleck Back in Rehab/Jennifer Intervention

I believe Jen is a strong, confident woman. When she's had enough, she will stop helping him. For now, she's helping him and I'm not going to criticise that.

 

I grew up with an alcoholic parent. Up, down, in, out... Only the addict can decide when s/he is ready to get clean. I hope Ben hates it enough and is strong enough to get clean. I hope Ben sees cleary how precious his children and sweet wife are. But ... he has to be ready.

 

I doubt Ben is looking for attention. He has enough $$$ to last a few lifetimes. He has gambling problems and it appears his weight is not under control. Best guess -- Ben has an addictive personality and has many areas to work on. Tragic for all.    

"I took a walk in the woods and came out taller than the trees." Henry David Thoreau
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Posts: 15,733
Registered: ‎01-06-2015

Re: Ben Affleck Back in Rehab/Jennifer Intervention

I would imagine she might be afraid he could die. And she doesn't want her children to go through that. I think she does everything she does for Ben for the sake of the children. She's all about their children. I don't think she wants to be an enabler. I won't sit in judgment of her, or him.

 

When they were married he had drinking problems, gambling problems, and fidelity problems. Couldn't have been easy for her to deal with, worst of all being the effect on their kids. Then for all that and more to be scrutinized by people who don't even know them. She talked about that recently, how the judgments about their divorce were so hurtful to her.

"This isn't a Wednesday night, this is New Year's Eve"
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Posts: 12,702
Registered: ‎08-22-2013

Re: Ben Affleck Back in Rehab/Jennifer Intervention

Everybody makes choices and when you abuse alcohol or drugs, that is a choice. It's your choice to have that first drink or take that drug. The only people who win here are the professionals who call it a disease and make money from trying to cure a weak, addictive personality. One time trying to get sober I can see, but not the same drill over and over again.