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Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,326
Registered: ‎10-21-2011

Re: Sadness at this time of year

You're right--it can be a sad time of year. I was not filled with that joy this year, my mother having passed in the Fall. It brought back missing my husband, and when I got a card from his niece, it made me miss him all the more. Can't be helped; the older you get, the more people you've lost.

Better to have lost and loved, however...so I just realize it's all part of living.

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,602
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Sadness at this time of year

Wow, such wonderful posts. To those of you who are hurting or alone here is a big hug from me to you ((((((((((hug))))))))))). Happy Holidays to all!
Honored Contributor
Posts: 16,938
Registered: ‎12-29-2010

Re: Sadness at this time of year

I think the Holidays can be a very sad time of year for many. I lost my mother at the end of March, and I know my dad is so sad. He posted a wedding picture of them on Facebook last night, and it said "thanks for all the good years". It was so sad to see that.

Merry Christmas to all!

"friends don't let friends drink white zinfandel"
Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,558
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Sadness at this time of year

Last night we had a Christmas Eve dinner with family. I should say this family is my BIL's family - he was married to my sister until she passed in 1999. They invite my dad and me to Christmas Eve dinner every year. Even after my BIL remarried, he invited us. Three months ago, he passed away. Then his sole living sibling passed two weeks ago. Last night was not a night for sadness; we laughed and had a wonderful time, just like he would have wanted. Happiness can be found in the sadness. It is hard but it can be.

Super Contributor
Posts: 389
Registered: ‎03-13-2010

Re: Sadness at this time of year

Every Christmas I remember getting up early, waking the kids for Santa's delivery, dressing them up (boys so this was an ordeal), packing the vehicle up, and driving 3 hours to spend Christmas with my parents for 3-5 hours and then driving home. What a hassle, but now, how I miss that. The holidays can be traumatic. I keep busy.

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,696
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Sadness at this time of year

This is a wonderful thread. So much of the advise makes sense. My dog and cat know somehow how sad I am right now, because my cat is not affection, but right now as we lay in bed, he is on my chest as I try to type this. I don,t dare move, even thought he is heavy. My dog decided to come right up and lay next to me on the pillow. Can,t move my right arm.

I came home early from my daughter's house last night because in front of 20+people she humiliated me and not even my two boys stood up f o r me. Will not go into detail, but I am done.

I have four volunteer jobs, and it helps me more than the people I help. Today, I will take down my decorations, and eat some of my favorite food. I will take the dog for a walk. I will do My exercise like I do everyday. All those people sitting down down at her table last night, just so they would think what a wonderful person she is, yet her heart is black.

I do miss the happy Christmas years, but they have been gone for quite awhile. I decorate every year for me. It makes me happy to come into my house, my sanctuary of peace. I was going to stay home last night, but didn,t want the family to say I was being a drama queen, which I,m not. I wish I had listen to my inner voice. For the preservation of my own well being, no more family dinners for me. Especially Holidays.

. Have a wonderful day today everyone. Really, it is just another day in our lives to live to the fullest as we see fit. Only we can choose to be sad or happy.

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,368
Registered: ‎03-30-2014

Re: Sadness at this time of year

Now I forget where, perhaps it was in the book Wild, but the lesson was that on the long walk of life others may only walk with us for a certain time. Then we have to go forward on our own and we may meet up with them later, or we may never see them again. But always remember that it was good when we were traveling together. And there will be new companions further up the trail. Just not the same travelers. I know I miss so many who are not with me, but I need to enjoy the newcomers.

Valued Contributor
Posts: 946
Registered: ‎01-21-2012

Re: Sadness at this time of year

Ms QVCAddiction - I just wanted to let you know that you are NOT alone with family disappointments. My husband is going through a similar thing right now and it does hurt. He had to eliminate some family members from his inner circle and just stop talking to them or limit it to brief telephone conversation.

Just know you are not alone.

Regular Contributor
Posts: 210
Registered: ‎03-29-2010

Re: Sadness at this time of year

A merry hug and kiss to everyone on the boards. You guys have sustained, supported, advised, educated, consoled me tnru the years. i dont come on as much as i used to but yes, i am lonely at many times of the year. I celebrated xmas with son, dil, gd on sunday. I took the food but left after a short while as i tried to converse but was ignored like i was invisible. I have decided to never again let the behavior of others control how i feel about myself. The point being, that behind the perfect posts on forums or smiling faces on facebook, everyone has problems. And for those that r worse than mine, i choose to consider myself extremely lucky.
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,221
Registered: ‎08-09-2012

Re: Sadness at this time of year

My family is small and spread out, so over the years I see less and less of them. This year is especially difficult because my sister's husband is losing his battle with cancer, and I think he was determined to make it through Christmas. They and their kids and grandkids live out of state. I only have a couple of relatives here, other than my son, and we no longer get together on Christmas since my mom and dad passed many years ago. So it does get lonely at times, and I understand where many others are coming from. I decorate my home inside and out because I love it myself, it's not necessarily for anyone else to appreciate (I'm still somewhat of a kid at heart). And I have my two sweet furbabies with me... they have my heart! {#emotions_dlg.wub}

I spend time cooking, my son will be here, and I will see a dear friend in the next few days. I have a niece who will be in the area with her daughter this weekend, so we will get together for lunch - but that's also sad because her father is the one who is sick with cancer.

I've never posted on the boards at Christmas before, in fact didn't even know if anyone would be here until last night, but it's very nice to know that there are other people who understand and are going through much the same type of thing. I'm thankful I've been able to make it to the age I have, but our lives do change so much as we get older, and it's not always pleasant. I think of times past with family piled into my parents' home, kids running around, cooking together, and just enjoying each other... but I don't dwell on it.

So I hope everyone who has posted here, and who feels a little lonely this Christmas time, will feel the same caring from other posters that I feel this morning. Thanks to all of you, and I wish for you a wonderful day! It will be what we choose to make of it. And thanks, digo, for starting this thread - your post was sweet and so thoughtful! Smile