Q Talk

[jubilant]

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@MaeE wrote:

Shawn needs to grow up, get her hair off her face, stop hiding behind it, stop dressing like a school girl and be more mature. she is afterall in her 40s...and her style and hair are way outdated...I can't watch her anymore.

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************  Would you be happy with her then?

[febe1]

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@jubilant wrote:

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@MaeE wrote:

Shawn needs to grow up, get her hair off her face, stop hiding behind it, stop dressing like a school girl and be more mature. she is afterall in her 40s...and her style and hair are way outdated...I can't watch her anymore.

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************  Would you be happy with her then?

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Well, it would be a start.... 

[jubilant]

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@febe1 wrote:

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@jubilant wrote:

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@MaeE wrote:

Shawn needs to grow up, get her hair off her face, stop hiding behind it, stop dressing like a school girl and be more mature. she is afterall in her 40s...and her style and hair are way outdated...I can't watch her anymore.

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************  Would you be happy with her then?

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Well, it would be a start.... 

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*************** So, to start...if Shawn would "change her hair, dress differently, be more mature, and restyle herself, that would please you enough to watch her?   Oh, I forgot...she needs to grow up, too.  Then people would watch her.  So basically, she needs to change who she is?  I see.

[Razzle dazzle1234]

Shawn pleas cut your bangs them hanging in front of your face is sloppy. Love you as a host  but clean up the hair and stay blonde

[CalminHeart]

I think we should all leave Shawn's looks alone.  Why are women so incredibly judgemental and nasty to other women about their looks?    

That said, I refuse to watch Shawn.  I don't like her way with words and something about her rubs me the wrong way. That's ok too.   We don't have to like everyone and everyone doesn't have to like us.

[jubilant]

I would like to say why I feel the way I do.  Today, more than ever, I see women scrutinizing other women ad nauseum.  I think we have all been guilty of it at one time or another. I know I have done it a few times in my life and I am not proud of myself when I do.  Something always checks me or reigns me in when I do.

    We talk about men putting women down when, actually, it seems to me women do it more. Maybe a certain host is not your favorite. I like some better than others myself.  To me the scrutiny has become critical and unkind. If it's not Shawn, it's another host.  If you have a gripe against a host and it really upsets you to the point you can no longer watch.... there are options other than coming to these forums and criticizing someone literally from head to toe. There is no justification for that.  Not for me....not for you.

[skuggles]

Nasty, Brutish, and Live , Technology created a global village-and put us at each other's throats. From the ideas section of the Boston Globe,April 23,2017.

 "If social media brings out the misanthrope in us, it can also unleash darker impulses. In a 2014 article in Personality  and Individual Differences, three Canadian psychologists reported on research that found that people with sadistic tendencies tend to be among the most active commenters on online forums. Like other sadists, so called trolls are motivated by the anticipation of pleasure, the study revealed; they take joy in inflicting pain on others. Although it's not clear whether the internet breeds cruelty or just encourages it, the findings add to the accumulting evidence linking excessive technology use to "antisociality,"the researchers wrote. "Sadists just want to have fun ... and the Internet is their playground!"

[dooBdoo]

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Jubilant wrote:

I would like to say why I feel the way I do.  Today, more than ever, I see women scrutinizing other women ad nauseum.  I think we have all been guilty of it at one time or another. I know I have done it a few times in my life and I am not proud of myself when I do.  Something always checks me or reigns me in when I do.

    We talk about men putting women down when, actually, it seems to me women do it more. Maybe a certain host is not your favorite. I like some better than others myself.  To me the scrutiny has become critical and unkind. If it's not Shawn, it's another host.  If you have a gripe against a host and it really upsets you to the point you can no longer watch.... there are options other than coming to these forums and criticizing someone literally from head to toe. There is no justification for that.  Not for me....not for you.

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          Such a perceptive post, @jubilant.     I think that gets to the heart of the matter.   It's a pervasive and disheartening trend.   The criticisms have morphed into pretty clear representations of the people posting them rather than informing us about the people they claim to "help" with the (usualy personal) dissecting and disparaging comments.   Slicing and dicing, and seeming to have a good time doing so.  "Few things reveal your intellect and your generosity of spirit — the parallel powers of your heart and mind — better than how you give feedback."  (Maria Popova, writer and critic) 

          There's a way to provide actual constructive criticism which allows the other person to go away feeling encouraged, edified, educated, and enlightened...  we seem to have lost our ability to do that.

[dooBdoo]

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skuggles wrote:

Nasty, Brutish, and Live , Technology created a global village-and put us at each other's throats. From the ideas section of the Boston Globe,April 23,2017.

 "If social media brings out the misanthrope in us, it can also unleash darker impulses.   In a 2014 article in Personality  and Individual Differences, three Canadian psychologists reported on research that found that people with sadistic tendencies tend to be among the most active commenters on online forums.   Like other sadists, so called trolls are motivated by the anticipation of pleasure, the study revealed; they take joy in inflicting pain on others.    Although it's not clear whether the internet breeds cruelty or just encourages it, the findings add to the accumulting evidence linking excessive technology use to "antisociality,"the researchers wrote. "Sadists just want to have fun ... and the Internet is their playground!"

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          Interesting, @skuggles.    The people who fit that description likely aren't especially introspective or insightful and probably wouldn't recognize this might -- at least in part -- shed light on their posting patterns.   Thanks for sharing this.

[SunValley]

Ahh...the cloak of anonymity, which I believe reveals, rather than covers, a person's character. When people can throw darts at others without consequences, it seems to unleash the dark side of some people. The Golden Rule is a good guidepost for maintaining a civil discourse but It seems to have been kicked to the curb.