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Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,743
Registered: ‎03-15-2010

Re: Does anyone else not like Christmas?


@WonderWoman01 wrote:

I don't like Christmas since my divorce.  Husband left in the month of October and the holidays that followed just were so very painful... He has no idea how much he hurt me and took away my self-esteem... I have moved on but Christmas and all the preparations  are just not the same.


 

 

Your words touched my heart. 

 

Having divorced when I was much younger, I understand what you are feeling.  No, they never know how much they hurt us, and, if they do, I'm convinced they just don't care.

 

Just having a quiet holiday to yourself is fine.  Now, you are free to make your own happy memories!

 

 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 10,371
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Does anyone else not like Christmas?

[ Edited ]

@Jacie wrote:

Christmas is what you make it! As grand or as minimal as you want! I learned a long time ago that you have a choice everyday as to how your attitude will be, life is short. Even Scrooge found that out! It is a happy season but you have to make it so!


 

 

I think each person's life experiences determine how they look at the holidays, just like most things.  To presume that it's someone's own attitude seems like judging without knowing the facts.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 10,371
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Does anyone else not like Christmas?


@CalminHeart wrote:

@CalminHeart wrote:

I admit it.  I'm Scrooge.  I don't like the hubbub around Christmas, gifts, decorations, parties, work functions, most of the music, etc.  The only exception is Christmas Eve when my entire family is together.  Otherwise, I'd be much happier skipping December altogether.


 

 

Hi.  I have wanted to post something like this for years but thought I'd be "run out of town" so it's nice to know others have some of the same feelings.   I don't begrudge anyone their fun and enjoyment of the holidays either. 

 

I come from a very large family and there are over 40 with just siblings and their families and our parents.  We really do have fun on Christmas Eve but it's not gift related....we just have fun together.  In fact, we get together once a month to celebrate birthdays, anniversaries, etc, and it's great.  


 

 

 

One of the things that boggles my mind is how some people judge those who don't enjoy the holidays....several posts here as well as something people run into in public or at work.   Every person has their own life experiences and to judge another because they don't like the holidays seems a bit much to me.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 16,195
Registered: ‎03-13-2010

Re: Does anyone else not like Christmas?

I love Christmas, it's my favorite time of the year.  But I will not bash anyone or think negatively of anyone if you do not care for it or are not happy at Christmas.  

 

I think many have experienced serious loss and these holidays are very painful.  Being bombarded with all of this happy-happy, everyone together --- especially if you have lost cherished loved ones --- is extremely difficult for many people to get through.  

 

I am not a fan of big parties, excess drinking and going overboard on spending, etc.  I like quiet times and one on one, or small, informal gatherings.  

 

I think too much emphasis is put on expensive gifts, dressing up to the hilt, going to fancy, expensive events.  But if that's what you are in to, then fine by me!

 

Better to focus on family, friends, and the real meaning of the season. 

 

For those who choose not to be a part, we need to respect their wishes.  

"A day without sunshine is like, you know, night." - Steve Martin
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Honored Contributor
Posts: 32,483
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Does anyone else not like Christmas?


@HB glamma wrote:

We don't have any family around us tho we have 5 kids, 10 grands.  Christmas doesn't amount to much for the 2 of us.  I wouldn't even decorate but DH insists on it.  The only part of Christmas I like is the music, the cookies and memories of when it used to feel special.  It's been ruined by retailers and greed.


You are free to celebrate the season however you choose.  How can stores and greed ruin how you feel or how you celebrate?  I don't get that.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 18,504
Registered: ‎05-23-2010

Re: Does anyone else not like Christmas?

Throughout my entire life, from childhood until the last 2-3 years, the Thanksgiving/Christmas season has been unhappy for me due to dysfunctional family. I have "hated Christmas" and hated that I hated it and that it su*ked for me, seems like forever.  Circumstances have changed relatively recently and I can and do enjoy now, but I have no happy childhood or adult happy holiday memories to draw from in "enjoying" the season - it still brings back the UNhappy memories.

 

But that's just for ME, and I'm well aware of that. I might envy, and sometimes resent, those who have had life-long Leave it to Beaver/Donna Reed Christmases, but I don't verbalize it of course and no one knows I feel this way - there's no reason I should bring others down because of my issues. Life is what it is.

Life without Mexican food is no life at all
Honored Contributor
Posts: 65,680
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Does anyone else not like Christmas?


@CalminHeart wrote:

@Jacie wrote:

Christmas is what you make it! As grand or as minimal as you want! I learned a long time ago that you have a choice everyday as to how your attitude will be, life is short. Even Scrooge found that out! It is a happy season but you have to make it so!


 

 

I think each person's life experiences determine how they look at the holidays, just like most things.  To presume that it's someone's own attitude seems like judging without knowing the facts.


Absolutely agree @CalminHeart... Life isn't always what you make it... and certainly Christmas isn't either... We all have a significant amount of free will, but so do others... As you note, life experiences, along with the impact of others, have a big impact on most people and certainly on how many people view the holidays. 


In my pantry with my cupcakes...
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,671
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Does anyone else not like Christmas?

My husband and I separated two weeks before Christmas many years ago, when my children were 5, 7, 9, I managed to give them Christmas throughout the years.

 

Today I decorate my home for each holiday for me, get a gift for friends and dog, my best friend.  I have 8 Greatgrand children, never see.  FIVE grandchildren who I spent THOUSANDS of dollars on and thousand of hours with, never hear from.

 Three grown children, I spend All Holidays alone, but though it brings tears to my eyes and a lump to my throat, I don,t let it spoil any day or Holiday.  I have memories of great Christmases.   When you are up in years, you cherish each day and give thanks for what you have, not what you don,t have.

 

I just got through volunteering this weekend at a joyous Victorian Holiday event and so many people were happy, that I felt good.  We volunteers got thanks for doing the service.  This is my joy.  Christmas is nice, but stresses people out and many moan about it.  Be glad you have a family and are alive.  Enjoy each day, no matter what.  We see in the world today how short it is.

 

 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 10,371
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Does anyone else not like Christmas?


@WonderWoman01 wrote:

I don't like Christmas since my divorce.  Husband left in the month of October and the holidays that followed just were so very painful... He has no idea how much he hurt me and took away my self-esteem... I have moved on but Christmas and all the preparations  are just not the same.


 

 

I understand.  I found out my ex cheated on Christmas Eve when my then 9 yr old told me in front of everyone on my side of the family - and I have a huge family.  

 

This is just one reason why Christmas is not at the top of my most liked days.

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,743
Registered: ‎03-15-2010

Re: Does anyone else not like Christmas?


@qvcaddition wrote:

My husband and I separated two weeks before Christmas many years ago, when my children were 5, 7, 9, I managed to give them Christmas throughout the years.

 

Today I decorate my home for each holiday for me, get a gift for friends and dog, my best friend.  I have 8 Greatgrand children, never see.  FIVE grandchildren who I spent THOUSANDS of dollars on and thousand of hours with, never hear from.

 Three grown children, I spend All Holidays alone, but though it brings tears to my eyes and a lump to my throat, I don,t let it spoil any day or Holiday.  I have memories of great Christmases.   When you are up in years, you cherish each day and give thanks for what you have, not what you don,t have.

 

I just got through volunteering this weekend at a joyous Victorian Holiday event and so many people were happy, that I felt good.  We volunteers got thanks for doing the service.  This is my joy.  Christmas is nice, but stresses people out and many moan about it.  Be glad you have a family and are alive.  Enjoy each day, no matter what.  We see in the world today how short it is.

 

 


I don't know the circumstances, but I am so sad you have such a large family, yet spend holidays alone.  This just doesn't seem right!

 

Yet, it sounds like you have made peace with whatever is going on and I admire you for that.

 

Blessings, this day and always!