Pet Lovers

[gizmogal]

I lost my dear old cat May 3. I got a condolence note in August from a distant someone who heard about it thru a friend. I was not upset to receive her note of sympathy and support and a brief mention of how she remembered my cat. I had stopped crying by late June, so  I wasn’t offended by someone thinking of me and reaching out a couple of months after. I didn’t plunge into depression and mourning. I wasn’t resenting being reminded of boo-hoo-my-cat-died, because it is a fact I live with and that crosses my mind with some regularity, while I go about my life without a pet.  I was happier to have this acquaintance send word of sympathy than ignore me for fear of undermining my peace of mind. 

Adults are resilient. They can take a loss and not have to bury their sad thoughts in order to survive. Understanding your gesture of care and concern should come naturally when she receives your card. Send it and it’s likely you’ll be thought of as inclusive in your empathy, not intrusive on her sadness. Gentle caring doesn’t arrive “on time” or “too late”. 

[speedy girl]

I would send the card, for sure. People like to know they are being thought about and since a little time has passed, she might be happy to get it. That is so thoughtful of you. 

[Annabellethecat66]

My thoughts are it's never to late to let someone know you are thinking about them.

Often I send flowers or goodies AFTER things have settled down a little.  

I know (speaking of when MY husband died) and from my friends who are widows.  We all feel like when loss happens everyone is right there (at the moment).

The life takes over and everyone goes about their business.  Not being mean, just life goes on and everyone gets busy.

But the person who experienced the loss is STILL grieving.  Right?

So, why not send a card just to say, "I'm thinking of you".

Who wouldn't enjoy that?  I know I do and would.

[simplyfriends]

I agree with most that’s it’s not too late. I understand your apprehension but I think she will appreciate it and it may be just what she needs. 

[Big Joanie]

Why don't you just be up front with her .. so write a note ... you realize the card may be late ...

You don't want to upset her over again .. but that you do recognize her loss ....and she is

in your thoughts ...

[lOVETOSHOP]

I think your friend will greatly appreciate your thoughtfulness and you should go ahead and send her the card.

In my past experiences when I've lost pets, it was harder to open and read cards when the loss had just happened...many cards I just couldn't open until at least a few weeks passed.  

You're very kind and thoughtful and your friend will think so too!  

[mzlg]

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@luvmybeetle wrote:

I would send the card and write a little note in it.  That would be more meaningful.  I just lost a cat and I would not be offended if someone acknowledged my loss at this time.

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@Annie107, I would agree with luvmybeetle, send a card with a handwritten message.

~

@luvmybeetle, I'm so sorry for the loss of your dear cat. I know that it is difficult, but I hope that the happy memories you have helps ease the pain.

[seaBreeze]

There is no wrong time to send a sympathy card, even for a pet. I am still "grieving" after four months when I lost my Gabby, and finally not crying when someone mentions her.

[wildlifewitch]

@Annie107  Not only is  it not too late, I think it is better. I'd write something like, I know it has ben a few months, but I thought you would need some cheering up.  People send cards and call then crickets, while people are just beginning to grieve.