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Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,934
Registered: ‎05-09-2014

Need comforting today

[ Edited ]

My sweet cat Arrow had to be put down today. He was 17 and had been a shelter rescue that I had adopted with his brother Cupid when they were about a year old. Cupid was a delightful huge cat when  he passed away a few years ago, but Arrow stayed on as a wonderful cuddly sweet little guy. I live alone , no kids, no SO, and he was so important to me. 

 

Over the years he aged and lost his hearing, developed cataracts, and in the last few months lost weight and became kind of feeble. I was guided by my vet’s suggestions and treated Arrow as best as I could afford; he did not improve. He got terribly thin and finally refused to eat this week, though he took a little water. He made mistakes out of the litter box. He slept continuously under the covers on my bed and almost winced if I touched him. He stopped all vocalizing, though he had been a very meow-y cat.  But he spooned with me when I slept. He tried hard to be a pal even as he was failing. 

 

I knew I had to give him up before he suffered organ failure from no nutrition and dehydration. The vet recognized the duty of mercy, too, and I let Arrow go over the Rainbow Bridge. I stayed with him until he was gone, gave his soft fur one last ruffle and fled to my car. I cleaned up the supplies and paraphernalia when I got home so as not to provoke fresh tears. There are many tears. 

 

I know I’ll get to feel better soon, and that it was my duty as his mom to help Arrow have peace, but I am terribly sad. Sorry for myself, feeling like maybe I should have left him until he got even worse so I’d have been surer. 

 

I’m sorry I had to write so much and made this so maudlin. I needed to get it out.  I have no doubt every person who let go of a sick old pal knows how I feel. The courage it takes and the doubt it provokes because of the responsibility. Starting today, I’m not a mommy. Very tough day. Thanks for your thoughts.

 

Super Contributor
Posts: 257
Registered: ‎02-11-2012

Oh gizmogal, so so sorry to hear this sad news.  Horrible as it always feels, you did the right thing.  In time your happy memories of your sweet kitty boy will be a great source of comfort and happiness.  And one day Cupid and Arrow may persuade you to adopt more kitties who will have the same wonderful home you gave to them.  Take good care of yourself.

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,889
Registered: ‎03-11-2010

Re: Need comforting today

[ Edited ]

I am so sorry for your loss. Those of us who have gone through the pain of putting down our beloved pets know how you feel. Remember the good times, the joy you brought to each other. May you find peace.

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,900
Registered: ‎03-11-2010

I am so sorry for your loss of Arrow.  I know that it won't do much good, but I am sending you a big hug.  Will keep you both in my prayers tonight.

~Breathe In~ Breathe Out~ Move On~
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Valued Contributor
Posts: 817
Registered: ‎06-24-2016

@gizmogal

 

I'm so sorry.  You know you will have support here on the Q. I must say Cupid and Arrow are the absolute cutest names.

 

It is just so sad, I know.  Here:  I'm sharing a cup of virtual tea with you right now...

Take care, hon.

             

                                  tea.jpg

 

 

 

Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,665
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

@gizmogal  OMG, I am SO sorry for your loss.  I truly understand how you are feeling.  I also live alone and have no children.  When I adopt a cat or kitten, that animal becomes my child.  I'm sure it was like that for you and your sweet Arrow.

 

Three years ago I went through the exact same thing with my 15 year old cat, Zoe.  She went through all the same regression as your Arrow, and toward the end I knew it was soon to come.  She has lost so much weight that her bones were painful to me on my lap, but she wanted to be there more than ever before, so I couldn't deny her that need to be close.

 

On her last day, she literally dragged herself to me and died there at my feet.  I can still see her there today, and I never even removed the "my Cat Zoe will take your message" from my answering machine.

 

Only a couple months after her death, a six week old feral kitten came into my life, and I named him Al (it was supposed to be Ally because they though he was a girl when they brought him to me!).  He's a very big and wild boy now, and his personality is very different from Zoe, but we love each other all the same.

 

I know the day will come where I will have to go through it all again, but having him as my little buddy now makes it all worthwhile.  I hope you will find it in your heart to bring another little friend into your life when you are ready.  God bless.

Laura loves cats!
Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,934
Registered: ‎05-09-2014

I am so grateful for the prompt replies, the tender support, the sincerity of your forum bond to me. This is what it is to be humanely human. Splendid sisters and brothers here. 

Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,354
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

@gizmogal  I am so sorry for Arrow's passing and the hole in your heart. I've been there and it can be very hard.

Have you ever considered fostering kitties for rescue, esp.since you have a home available?

I rescued a new dog 6 weeks after my rescue Indy passed unexpectedly. It did help us, esp. with the house being too quiet.

I will keep you and Arrow in my prayers to St. Francis, patron saint of our furbabies.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 8,504
Registered: ‎03-10-2013

@gizmogal I’m sorry for your loss. It’s never easy to say good bye to a loved one but you did what was the best for your sweet Arrow. I’m confident that your Veterinarian did the best with your little sweetie.  I hope you are able to open your heart and home to another sweet pet. We’ve all been there so we feel your pain. Take care .

Honored Contributor
Posts: 16,837
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

@gizmogal  I'm so sorry for your loss.  I know how hard it is to lose a beloved pet.  I have no doubt you did the right thing for Arrow by letting him go today.  I feel like that's the last kind thing you can do for your pet.  He deserved to be freed from his suffering today, and you were there for him until the end.  It will take time to grieve and heal.


The Bluebird Carries The Sky On His Back"
-Henry David Thoreau