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Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,181
Registered: ‎03-29-2020

Re: How Do You Deal With The Grief?

the best advice I can give you--having experienced this more than I ever wanted to--is just...go with the flow, so to seak. If you need to have a good cry, go ahead and cry. If visiting a pet shelter makes you feel better, do it. If praying helps, do it.

ETA: you have my sympathy. Losing a pet IS missing a part of your family. The one last piece of advice I have for you (and I could be wrong on this so take it with a grain of salt) is to NOT adopt another pet right awa--your feelings are too raw...

...EXCEPT if you, by some stroke of luck, find the RIGHT ONE, right away. If it's meant to be, you'll know. (That's what happened to me (long story too long for this post.)

You have my sympathy and may, many hugs. Heart


Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,516
Registered: ‎04-03-2010

Re: How Do You Deal With The Grief?

First let me say how sorry I am for the loss of your beloved pet.  I know the crack in the heart that it leaves, and although that crack may fill in a little bit over the course of time, the crack still remains.

 

One thing that helped me when I lost my last pet (12 years ago now), was to write down a poem or a letter of all the silly things and things I loved about that particular pet.  He was an orange cat and was a fabulous hunter, always bringing me critters and leaving them around the house.  I drew a picture of him, and colored it in and dressed him up in a little hunter's cap, catching snakes, etc....makes me cry just thinking about it.  But to this day I still have this little hand drawn picture and poem that I come upon from time to time, and it makes me remember the fun that he was, no sadness.

 

So that's what I recommend.  Writing down your good thoughts and fun times, and drawing a little picture as you remember and tucking it away in a special place.Cat Happy

Flowers are nature's way of laughing
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,334
Registered: ‎07-17-2010

Re: How Do You Deal With The Grief?


@GoneButNotForgotten wrote:

the best advice I can give you--having experienced this more than I ever wanted to--is just...go with the flow, so to seak. If you need to have a good cry, go ahead and cry. If visiting a pet shelter makes you feel better, do it. If praying helps, do it.

ETA: you have my sympathy. Losing a pet IS missing a part of your family. The one last piece of advice I have for you (and I could be wrong on this so take it with a grain of salt) is to NOT adopt another pet right awa--your feelings are too raw...

...EXCEPT if you, by some stroke of luck, find the RIGHT ONE, right away. If it's meant to be, you'll know. (That's what happened to me (long story too long for this post.)

You have my sympathy and may, many hugs. Heart



Thanks, @GoneButNotForgotten . Hugs to you 💜 

 

I do have a little buddy I adopted a couple weeks before Milo died.  I had thought I would get Milo a buddy once I was fully vaccinated, and when I saw this new little guy, I thought, "he's the one."

 

We are still getting used to each other.  It has been hard, as he has been a little skittish, and it's made me feel worse at times.  However, just knowing a sweet little someone is in the house with me has probably been beneficial in some ways.  I want to get him a buddy, but I want us to be comfortable with one another before I think seriously about that.

 

I still cry about Milo being gone.  I don't know how long it will take to feel okay with him being gone; I'm not there yet.



"Heartburn Can Cause Cancer" -- www.ecan.org
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,334
Registered: ‎07-17-2010

Re: How Do You Deal With The Grief?


@jellyBEAN wrote:

First let me say how sorry I am for the loss of your beloved pet.  I know the crack in the heart that it leaves, and although that crack may fill in a little bit over the course of time, the crack still remains.

 

One thing that helped me when I lost my last pet (12 years ago now), was to write down a poem or a letter of all the silly things and things I loved about that particular pet.  He was an orange cat and was a fabulous hunter, always bringing me critters and leaving them around the house.  I drew a picture of him, and colored it in and dressed him up in a little hunter's cap, catching snakes, etc....makes me cry just thinking about it.  But to this day I still have this little hand drawn picture and poem that I come upon from time to time, and it makes me remember the fun that he was, no sadness.

 

So that's what I recommend.  Writing down your good thoughts and fun times, and drawing a little picture as you remember and tucking it away in a special place.Cat Happy


Thank you, @jellyBEAN .💜 

 

I got his ashes back from the vet.  They also did a little imprint in clay of his paws.  When I saw it, I cried.  I was expecting to get a cheap little tin with his ashes in it, but they came in a nice wooden box, and with an engraved plate.  I'm thinking maybe I will write a poem or do a drawing and put it in that wooden box.

 

It's still hard to feel anything but sadness.  I just keep telling myself he had a long life and he won't suffer now.  That's the best I can do for the time being. 

 

 



"Heartburn Can Cause Cancer" -- www.ecan.org