Reply
Valued Contributor
Posts: 826
Registered: ‎01-21-2011

My SIL, who is one of the best people in the world, is in a bad way.  Her beloved boy , around 16-17, is having kidney failure.  He's lost a great deal of weight and spends most of his time by himself in the basement.  He goes to the vet constantly but she knows he's not going to last much longer.  Her and my brother and I are all childless so our babies are our kids.  They have great faith, and she is strong, but my brother is taking this very hard.  This is the last of their 3 kids and they feel they are too old to get another.  On top of the kittie's illness, her only sister has spent the last 2 months in and out of the hospital.  I'm crying while I'm typing this because I don't know how to comfort her.  So much sadness and loss as we get older.

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,818
Registered: ‎06-21-2015

We just lost our Molly of 15 years and I wish I knew of something to say or do that could make it better.  There just isn't.  Going through this has been the most difficult thing we have ever had to deal with. All I  can say "one day at a time".

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,915
Registered: ‎06-15-2014

Just listen, and be there for them. Platitudes don’t help.

A shoulder,a hug ......with age comes loss.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 10,154
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

When a colleague of mine lost her young Siamese to an accident, I gave her a copy of the Rainbow Bridge and sent her a card.  Thankfully, they now have them for the loss of a pet.

 

She'd never seen a card like that and said it brought her to tears, but she was so grateful.  I believe we need to acknowledge that the loss of a family pet, is the loss of a family member.  The grief is just as real and strong.

 

Beyond that, just let her and your brother know you're there for them and you understand their loss.  Heart

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,890
Registered: ‎08-20-2012

Yes it breaks your heart when they go.  There is always grief at the loss.  What they must remember is that their beloved kitty boy has lived a cats age.  They cared for him his whole life long and that is what good guardians do.  We can try as best we can to make them comfortable and show them love.  Her boy is making ready to go in his own time and they must remember that thanks to them he is safe and comfortable in his declining days.

Perhaps in the future they could Foster a kitty or dog for a shelter.  Be the gateway to a forever home for some lucky furbaby.

I'm so sorry they have to deal with such trying times and wish them peace.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,307
Registered: ‎12-08-2010

I'm so sorry for what you and your Loved Ones are having to go through.  I agree with sweetee2, "one day at a time"  Just be there

for them.  Let them talk, let them cry, etc.  It's going to take time.

Lots of time for most of us.  These Precious animals, are not just a Pet.  They Are Family Members.  

 

Personally, I'm just starting month 3 without my PR.  It's getting better, meaning that I can talk about him now, without falling apart every time I do.  Of course it still hurts, but time is helping to heal.  

 

{{{Gentle Caring Hugs To You All}}}Heart

If you want to change the tenor of your interactions, you must become aware of the impact of your words...Karen Casey
Honored Contributor
Posts: 23,835
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

just be there for them... let them cry... let them be sad..... it is all part of the process. There is not a fix for such great loss.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 9,654
Registered: ‎06-10-2015

I am always at a loss as to what to say in these type of situations, being human or animals.  Nothing really helps.  They need to go through the grieving process.  Maybe you could cook them a dinner and take it to them.

BE THE PERSON YOUR DOG THINKS YOU ARE! (unknown)
Honored Contributor
Posts: 20,163
Registered: ‎10-04-2010

Re: How Do I Comfort ......

[ Edited ]

If you can find her a shawl, have her wrap it around her when she needs a hug.  I'm going to learn how and then plan to make prayer shawls to pass on to those in need of comfort.  Couple of years ago, on here, I read about something similar, I think at the time, it was a blanket.  If you read about prayer shawls, you'll read about the comfort passed on from one person to another.  Anything on that line, when they need a hug, when they need to wrap themselves in comfort (even as it is), maybe this will help your friends.

 

I'm so sorry for what they are going through.  I know this little one will be our last too.  In fairness to all, it just has to be.  It's going to be very hard to go through. Totally understand.

 

@bootsanne

Honored Contributor
Posts: 19,347
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Other than a hug, I'm at a loss. Are they really too old to adopt another pet?