Pet Lovers

[ChynnaBlue]

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@CrazyDaisy wrote:

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@RinaRina wrote:

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@Citrine1 wrote:

You may be a lovely person and a wonderful pet parent, but it just doesn't come across in this post. You took a 15 year old dog to 7 vets in one year and gave each a bad review because they couldn't help your dog?!  He was 15 and he was dying -- what did you expect?  15 is a good long life for a lab.  I'm sorry, but you come across as obsessed and borderline unstable.  

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I was hurt by your comment.  But in retrospect, you're right.  I was obsessed.

When I went over all my vet bills 2 weeks ago, honestly, I thought to myself, "I must've been temporarily insane."  I couldn't believe how much money I'd spent. 

So, you're right. 

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I am sorry you were hurt by this remark, however I must agree with Citrine2.  It is not the money you spent, it comes down to your willingness to accept vets assessments.  As with any medical issue, you often have to look at it with both your head and your heart.  15 years for a lab is a very long life, you need to be be grateful as well as proud of yourself for getting him that far.  Saying goodbye is always the most difficult decision we make for our pets. 

When you foster pets (I could never do it) you are always saying goodbye.  You never know if they will be there for days or months.  They are looking for stable environments to temporarily take care of the dogs.  Difficulty letting go of them can cause problems for shelters and rescues. 

I would suggest volunteering at a local shelter for now.  You can see how you would handle the constant leaving of dogs you may have become attached.  Then you can determine if fostering is for you.  While there you may just find one you just have to bring home for good.

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First, RinaRina, I love that you took a comment that hurt your feelings, reflected on it, and saw the truth in it. May we all be so wise and gracious.

You were going through the stages of grief even before your beloved pet died because you saw the writing on the wall and began the denial and bargaining stages. I think grief makes many people a little crazy for a while.

Second, I think that CrazyDaisy has a great point about saying goodbye to foster pets and volunteering instead of fostering. I'm sure that the fostering agencies can see your grief and how hard it was for you to cope with the loss of your loved one and worry for you when it comes to having foster animals that you may have to give up. Some of the people I know who foster animals keep them forever, but some also foster animals that people won't adopt because they are sick. My friend just lost her most recent foster cat to cancer this week. Foster families say good bye frequently and they may worry that you won't be able to handle that so soon after your recent loss.

Asking to volunteer may be a good opportunity for you to spend some time with animals to help you start to heal AND could help you build credibility with the rescue groups. It will show them that you're committed to helping animals and that you would be a suitable foster or adoptive pet parent. I think you should give that a shot if you can find a rescue center that yoou can get to without having to drive, since you don't enjoy driving.

I'm so sorry for your loss and I hope you find a new friend to love.

[labloverrr]

Sorry, you went through so much with your fur baby.  I, like you never wanted to euthanize any of my dogs. My 11yr Golden in 2012 which i had since he was 6 months, he was a "turn in" back to the breeder because he chewed their wall while he was leashed to the door knob, imagine that!!! He was the such a smart beautiful loyal dog, their loss - my gain.  My 15yr Lab in 2014, which i had since she was 7 weeks old, a birthday gift from my cousin. When it was time for each of them to leave me both were put down at home, each one by the time the vet arrived at my house they were almost gone but they still got the needle. Each time afterwards people kept trying to give me dogs. After losing each one I was in no condition to take on and train any new dogs. Especially after my my Lab went to rainbow bridge. Since it's pretty recent that you lost your Lab from my experience I would tell you to wait and heal first. I know I could never foster because i know it would hurt to see them leave. I can't even go to the shelters because I just want to take them all home. Right now I have only 1 dog, she's a Lab/Shepard I've had since she was about 7 weeks, she takes all my energy right now.  I'm still not ready to get another dog but I'm sure I will be sometime in the future. Good luck and if you're ready another place you can check is with your vet, my vet here gets dogs that owners don't want for one reason or another so they look for homes for them.

[gailcoco]

First of all, I'm sorry for your loss.  I can understand how crazy and angry you may have gotten but that's all behind you now.  Do you live in such a small town that they have you on the NoNo list?  I'm in a small town but the form I ever had to fill out was a small and pertinent form plus promising to care for the pet and spay/neuter.

I say keep trying and when you do apply don't go into all this past history.  Just tell them you lost a very loved family pet. 

I couldn't foster because I don't think I could part with any animal under my care.  A friend was fostering some kittens and their mother and I took 3 of the kittens.  All that week I kept thinking about the remaining kittens and mother.....so I went and got all of them.  My friend had to lie to the shelter because most shelters won't let you adopt so many - especially if you already have pets.  So I became 2 people for these adoptions.  Right now I have 5 dogs and 8 cats and I love each and every one.  As for dogs, I don't have to adopt.  They seem to wander up to my property and hang around.  That's how I ended up with 5 dogs.

I think you should try adopting an older dog.  They need love just as much as the younger dogs.

Anyway, good luck with your search and please don't give up.  I wish you peace and love.

Gail

[thisbe]

I worked as a adoption volunteer with my local humane society for several years before I quit.  They did keep a "don't adopt" list that they shared with other area rescue agencies.  I don't know that vets assisted in compiling the list but would be surprised if that was the case except in extreme situations.  People got added to the list by having (in the mind of whoever you are dealing with) too many cats/dogs/other animals/young children, not having a fenced yard, saying they would give away or euthanize a pet you could no longer take care of, returning a pet to a humane society or shelter, or just if they just impress the adoption volunteer in a negative way.  I found that people were added to the list arbitrarily and often without any factual basis.  It was all very subjective. Agencies are much more particular about approving adoption of dogs than cats. You might have more luck with a shelter than a humane society, or you could try adoption groups in the next county.

I'm sorry for the loss of your pet.  Good luck.

[Tadaki]

I think it's great that you want a rescue or shelter dog.  I do agree with others, though, that you probably need time to heal.

And I agree that all vets are not created equal.  Just like every other profession, there are some who are excellent and some who are just mediocre.  When you get another dog, I would try to find someone you trust for regular visits.  Then when anything is wrong, you'll feel more confident.   

We have to love our pets enough to let go when every day is an ordeal for them, and you did that for your Lab.        

[Kachina624]

I've been working with a breed rescue group for about 12 years.  We try to screen applicants "in" rather than "out".  We don't have set rules except for a yard and a sturdy fence of adequate height.  Even that might be waived depending on the activity level of the dog.  Many dogs are not suitable for the person who wants it, but we try to find one that is.  We do home checks but I'm not aware of reference checks being done unless there is an issue.  Many of our adopters are also former adopters.  It's pretty obvious when the home check is done whether the adopter will be able to adequately care for an animal both physically and financially.

I've never heard of rescue groups having "black lists" or speaking among themselves about potential adopters.  I rarely meet anyone in another rescue group, let alone compare notes.  We do reserve the right to re-take possession of an animal for whom adequate care in not available and all adopters sign a contract so stating.

I've adopted two of my foster dogs.  One will need lifelong medical care as she has an autoimmune disease similar to rheumatoid arthritis and she takes daily medication.  She has improved tremendously in the year that I've had her.  The other I've had 11 1/2 years, and she's going strong.

[RinaRina]

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@thisbe wrote:

I worked as a adoption volunteer with my local humane society for several years before I quit.  They did keep a "don't adopt" list that they shared with other area rescue agencies.  I don't know that vets assisted in compiling the list but would be surprised if that was the case except in extreme situations.  People got added to the list by having (in the mind of whoever you are dealing with) too many cats/dogs/other animals/young children, not having a fenced yard, saying they would give away or euthanize a pet you could no longer take care of, returning a pet to a humane society or shelter, or just if they just impress the adoption volunteer in a negative way.  I found that people were added to the list arbitrarily and often without any factual basis.  It was all very subjective. Agencies are much more particular about approving adoption of dogs than cats. You might have more luck with a shelter than a humane society, or you could try adoption groups in the next county.

I'm sorry for the loss of your pet.  Good luck.

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I KNEW IT!

THAT IS exactly what I suspected.  The last rescue agency I contacted was initially VERY ANXIOUS.  They emailed me almost everyday.  Yesterday, they wanted pictures of my backyard, which I sent immediately.  I sent 6 photos AND, I sent copies to myself to make sure they went thru.   This morning when I checked my email, they said they did NOT get any of the pics.  So, I resent one as a test.  They replied and said my yard had a weird shape AND THEY HAD NO DOGS FOR ME.  They also said that the dog I'd specifically expressed an interest in was inappropriate for me.  (HOW would they know?  I never filled out an application!)  It was a nasty email.  BTW, along with the last pic, I mentioned that I had $70 worth of dog food that was in the original carton UNOPENED which was shipped from Chewy.com that I was willing to donate.  They refused it.

I suspected my name was on a list.  I live in a small town full of snobs.  When I'm ready to get a dog, I'll have to get one off Craigslist.

Thanks.

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[RinaRina]

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@Tadaki wrote:

I think it's great that you want a rescue or shelter dog.  I do agree with others, though, that you probably need time to heal.

And I agree that all vets are not created equal.  Just like every other profession, there are some who are excellent and some who are just mediocre.  When you get another dog, I would try to find someone you trust for regular visits.  Then when anything is wrong, you'll feel more confident.   

We have to love our pets enough to let go when every day is an ordeal for them, and you did that for your Lab.        

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You know what sent me "over the edge" during my last conversation with the hospital vet?  When she told me that the Enalapril "attacked" my dogs kidneys.  Altho' I'd researched Enalapril last year BEFORE giving it to my dog, I only read about the side-affects, which seemd pretty harmless.  It wasn't until my dog started going downhill quickly that I went back online and AT THE VERY BOTTOM of the page, it said, "do not dispense to dogs with kidney disease".  

I went ballistic!  SEVEN different veterinarians had given me REFILLS for Enalapril.  It was like the blind leading the blind.  They just didn't care.  

[HappyDaze]

Why are they snobs? You wrote some not-so-nice things because of what they were telling you about your dog (and what you didn't want to hear) and then you expect them to allow you to foster with them? I mean, it is like writing a seething review about a company and then applying for a job. It is only natural for them to be wary of you after what you wrote and the experience they had with you.

It seems like you are continuing to insult them even now, even when you knew you were probably wrong in writing what you did. I would think if you really wanted to foster with these groups, you'd try to make amends and try to prove that you can be level headed, even under times of incredible stress. They are trying to do what is right for these animals, many of which have been abused, so they want to make sure that the foster parent(s) can handle the good and bad times.

Not to be rude but at this point, just by reading your posts regarding this, I would have to side with them and not have you foster, at least not at this time.

[RinaRina]

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@HappyDaze wrote:

Why are they snobs? You wrote some not-so-nice things because of what they were telling you about your dog (and what you didn't want to hear) and then you expect them to allow you to foster with them? 

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You're confused.  The above message is regarding the LAST rescue place I contacted.  I never wrote any disparaging remarks to them.  In fact, I never even filled out the application.  All they had was my name (from my email address) and pictures of my backyard, which they claimed they didn't get.  As I said, I resent one pic this morning, and then got a nasty response.  My yard is a weird shape??? Really?? Well, my LAB really enjoyed it for TWELVE years!  So did my neighbor's dog who used to wander in my backyard all the time.

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