Re: Would you love your child . . .

Zhills · ‎11-15-2011

It would be nice if love really was a 2 way street but you can love without sharing their life.

I love my daughter and grand daughters even though we are not always in touch.

I remember my favorite saying by James Coburn, "Love is what YOU feel."

You never know exactly what anyone else means when they say, "I love you." You assume they feel the same way we do, but do they? We will never know!

Just because they do not say it does not necessarily mean they don't love you. PRIDE makes us do weird things sometimes.

Unfortunately, it is what it is. You can't change the past. Today is a brand new day!

YorkieonmyPillow · ‎01-13-2013

@Melania wrote:

A sincere card would have meant more....without the "peaceful" dig.

My impression, as well.

No wonder she didn't reply!

Plaid Pants2 · ‎03-14-2015

@YorkieonmyPillow wrote:
@Melania wrote:

A sincere card would have meant more....without the "peaceful" dig.

My impression, as well.
No wonder she didn't reply!

I am always curious in hearing the other side of the story.

I'd love to hear the daughter's take on all of this.

Trinity11 · ‎11-16-2014

@Plaid Pants2 wrote:
@YorkieonmyPillow wrote:
@Melania wrote:

A sincere card would have meant more....without the "peaceful" dig.

My impression, as well.
No wonder she didn't reply!

I am always curious in hearing the other side of the story.

I'd love to hear the daughter's take on all of this.

@Plaid Pants2The problem with sharing here is that no one really understands all the nuances of the relationships involved. On the surface Ford's dilemma with her oldest daughter may seem easy to solve with just apologizing to her. The issue is time has made everything more ingrained in everyone's mind.

A good psychologist is necessary to really get to the bottom of this and since time is of the essence, personally, I would seek outside help. This board is full of well meaning posters who want to help, however, we are probably missing a lot of pertinent information about the people involved. Any conclusion we may come to could cause harm to all parties involved.

Melania · ‎06-12-2013

OP said she met with a counselor and when she was told she was wrong regarding her so called bad daughter....she ditched the counselor. Nuff said.

The bad daughter did nothing directly to OP but she has taken sides and it will never heal. Good daughter/bad daughter...SMH. To this day she can't help but send a greeting with a dig. Who wants to be around that??

But don't expect children to come to you when you have made it clear how you feel.

The thread title says it all. Love and respect is earned. Even as a parent. My gosh....

Isobel Archer · ‎04-04-2015

@Trinity11 wrote:
@Plaid Pants2 wrote:
@YorkieonmyPillow wrote:
@Melania wrote:

A sincere card would have meant more....without the "peaceful" dig.

My impression, as well.
No wonder she didn't reply!

I am always curious in hearing the other side of the story.

I'd love to hear the daughter's take on all of this.
@Plaid Pants2The problem with sharing here is that no one really understands all the nuances of the relationships involved. On the surface Ford's dilemma with her oldest daughter may seem easy to solve with just apologizing to her. The issue is time has made everything more ingrained in everyone's mind.

A good psychologist is necessary to really get to the bottom of this and since time is of the essence, personally, I would seek outside help. This board is full of well meaning posters who want to help, however, we are probably missing a lot of pertinent information about the people involved. Any conclusion we may come to could cause harm to all parties involved.

It seems clear that she has taken a side and does not want any input that her bad daughter could have points on her side. As I said earlier, she has brought this up over and over - always with the - poor me - I'm in the middle etc. etc. and refuses to discuss the original situation. Probably because when she did, some folks didn't agree that what the bad daughter did was so awful after all. Apparently, she has ditched the therapist for similar reasons.

RoseGraham · ‎06-27-2017

Exactly

Plaid Pants2 · ‎03-14-2015

@Isobel Archer wrote:
@Trinity11 wrote:
@Plaid Pants2 wrote:
@YorkieonmyPillow wrote:
@Melania wrote:

A sincere card would have meant more....without the "peaceful" dig.

My impression, as well.
No wonder she didn't reply!

I am always curious in hearing the other side of the story.

I'd love to hear the daughter's take on all of this.
@Plaid Pants2The problem with sharing here is that no one really understands all the nuances of the relationships involved. On the surface Ford's dilemma with her oldest daughter may seem easy to solve with just apologizing to her. The issue is time has made everything more ingrained in everyone's mind.

A good psychologist is necessary to really get to the bottom of this and since time is of the essence, personally, I would seek outside help. This board is full of well meaning posters who want to help, however, we are probably missing a lot of pertinent information about the people involved. Any conclusion we may come to could cause harm to all parties involved.
It seems clear that she has taken a side and does not want any input that her bad daughter could have points on her side. As I said earlier, she has brought this up over and over - always with the - poor me - I'm in the middle etc. etc. and refuses to discuss the original situation. Probably because when she did, some folks didn't agree that what the bad daughter did was so awful after all. Apparently, she has ditched the therapist for similar reasons.

@Isobel Archer

Which is why I would love to hear the "bad" daughter's side.

I highly doubt that the "bad" daughter is as bad as LT makes her out to be.

The "bad" daughter is probably hurt, angry, and just plain fed up with the fact that she has been cast out as the "black sheep" of the family, and for her own health, has distanced herself from the rest of the family.