What to do about "supposed friend?" - Page 2

Kachina624 · ‎03-10-2010

@Bubby Mommy Where's your backbone? This woman can take advantage of you only if you let her. Just say,"no", then tell her what you told us. You're not a bakery and you only bake when you're in the mood, for the people you choose to treat.

If you a accepted the baking supplies (bet you did) return them immediately with a recipe for apple pie.

If your "friendship" is ruined, it won't be much of a loss.

New Mexico☀️Land Of Enchantment

Love my grandkids · ‎11-24-2013

@Bubby Mommy I agree with Kanchina. Use your backbone.

Being me and having zero tolerance for fake friends, I would be putting all the stuff on her door step. I may or may NOT knock on the door and let her know!

She's a taker. Tell her you don't bake "on demand" and return her junk.

Glittergal · ‎05-12-2010

Here's another possibility. Your friend knows you bake at this time of year and to her it seems like it's something you love to do. She thought she was being kind by bringing you the ingredients you would need to thank you for all the times you gave her baked pies in the past. The critique about the sprinkles on the cookies was plain rude, however.

Icegoddess · ‎03-19-2010

@Flopsy wrote:
Slightly off the topic but similar we had neighbors a few years ago and had a bad snow storm. They did not have a snow ploughing so we helped out. Did a good job while they stayed indoors. Soon after he came over and said "you missed a bit" and asked for the snow blower. Gave him it on loan, damaged it, learned lesson, never again.

@Flopsy,I let my best friend's husband borrow the tiller my father had given to me after he had upgraded. I told her it leaked and needed oil added regularly. He apparently didn't believe me. Yeah, lesson learned.

Love my grandkids · ‎11-24-2013

@Glittergal If you read the other responses, you are the only one who thinks the apples and other stuff was a "thank you". NO way.

It was "here, make me some more pies as I consider you my personal pie shop."

GenXmuse · ‎05-15-2016

I'd have her over and teach her and her daughter how to make one and let her know your kitchen is closed. If she's not interested, she can buy one.

GenXmuse · ‎05-15-2016

@Love my grandkids wrote:
@Glittergal If you read the other responses, you are the only one who thinks the apples and other stuff was a "thank you". NO way.

It was "here, make me some more pies as I consider you my personal pie shop."

That doesn't mean she's wrong. I was thinking the same thing myself. Why assume the worst of people?

Sooner · ‎03-10-2010

@Bubby Mommy wrote:
I have a "friend" that I've known for years. I, myself, love to bake and in fact, I bake all the time. In the past I have made homemade apple pies, and I brought one over to my friend as a gift. She and her family loved it, and I'm glad they enjoyed it. However, now she expects me to bake pies for her all the time. The other day, she rang my bell with her 8 year old daughter and when I opened the door she handed me a huge bag of apples and a sack of flour and sugar and says: "It's that time of year again!!!!" Then her kid hands me a "gift" of some cutesy, but inexpensive earrings, I guess as a "thank you" for providing them with home baked apple pies. This really annoyed me. When I bake and I give gifts of my cooking to family and frineds, I do it because I WANT to. I don't like being TOLD to bake. Baking takes a lot of time and I think it is very presumptuous of this woman to expect me to be a personal baker for her. What to do? I can explain to her that while I am happy she enjoys my pies, I cannot be expected to make pies at her behest; I am not a bakery. She is obviously a taker. I have had enough. That will probably be the end of any so-called friendship; but that's really not the worst thing. By the way, that's not the only nonsense she has pulled. I have also baked Italian cookies at Christmastime, and after I brought a big basket of cookies to her family I got "critiqued." I was told they loved the cookies, but would prefer that if the next time I make them, to leave off the sprinkles(????). A lot of nerve, and I'm being kind with that description.

@Bubby Mommy Is this really a big deal? She was giving you some apples, you love to bake, I would think she thought you would be happy.

Couldn't you just laugh and said how sweet of you, but I won't be baking now I'm so busy. Or taken then back to her and said "I don't have time."

And I don't see asking to leave out the sprinkles as a big deal either. The same way I wouldn't see a big deal if she asked you to stop bringing them baked goods as they are not eating that sort of thing very much.

I don't see the issue here but a lot of people get furious if you don't accept baked goods, and worse if you accept and -- horrors -- they don't eat them. And even worse of they refuse the offer. This I get from reading posts here.

This comes up every fall and holiday season. It's a huge thing with many posters. Me? I simply don't see the problem with what other people eat and don't eat.

Is it already time to ring the bell and start round one of the annual food fight.

Desertdi · ‎03-13-2010

You could throw a dead fish in the gutter over her front door...

♥Surface of the Sun♥

chrystaltree · ‎05-10-2010

Doesn't sound like she's much of a friend to me. I would have ended the baked freebies to her after the sprinkles comment. I'm not really the doormat type so I would have handled the situation head on. I wouldn't have accepted the apples, sugar, cheap earrings etc. I'd have said something "sorry honey, I'm not your personal baker ha ha. I can give you a recipe if you need one". She sounds weird. I think she has mistaken your generosity as an obligation to give her family baked goods. She upped the ante and wants them on demand. She thinks that's ok if she provides the ingredients. I think you are going to have to put your big girl panties on and return all those ingredients and tell her what you told us.